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Christmas

From present ideas to party food, find all your Christmas inspiration here.

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Original poster

Worst present YOU’VE bought for someone…

114 replies

DottyHarmer · 13/11/2021 11:05

… when you thought you’d got it really right.

I was remembering when mil had mentioned a book she’d enjoyed at school, and for Christmas I tracked down a first edition and presented it proudly to her. The reaction was… silence. I garbled about how she had talked about it fondly. Shortly afterwards I overheard her loudly whispering to fil, “Why on earth did Dotty give me a charity shop book.” Pah.

OP posts:

Sarcobaleno · 13/11/2021 11:18

I bought someone a goldfish once. They were extremely unimpressed 😂

mam0918 · 13/11/2021 11:18

When I was a smallish child (about 7-8) child I tried to buy my dad a birthday gift all by myself with the money I saved, the only things I could afford were in the bargain bucket so I just picked something rubber thing (like a beer mat/coaster type thing) with writing on that looked pretty even though I didn't understand the writing.

Turned out it was ex-valentine stock and had bought him a sexy, smutty poem designed to be given to someone your sleeping with.

Now I'm old enough to understand I cringe so hard but at the time my dad nearly died laughing and my mam got really annoyed at first and yelled that I was inappropriate (although did laugh it off in the end) and it hurt loads because I tried so hard and thought I had been really grown up to pick it myself and didn't understand why.

Original poster

DottyHarmer · 13/11/2021 11:22

Awww, @mam0918 . Reminds me when dsis brought back some coasters from Greece for dm depicting some classical figures. Oh dear - the positions . Dsis hadn’t really looked as they were in cellophane. The coasters were most speedily hidden in the bottom of the sideboard.

OP posts:

WheelieBinPrincess · 13/11/2021 11:22

I bought my dad a pair of gerbils because he was divorced and I thought (wrongly, as it turned out!) lonely.

The dug their way out and escaped, made a nest in his work bag and ate his ticket to the upcoming Euros. The woman he was seeing discovered them, thought they were mice and lobbed the whole bag into the garden.

I ended up with the buggers who lived a long happy gerbily life.

VitalsStable · 13/11/2021 11:30

I bought DD a car cleaning kit to give to XH the week after I got the car in the settlement. He was an abusive arsehole and after years of abuse me having the car which he was still paying off was karma.

Wiglio · 13/11/2021 11:44

@VitalsStable

Stinkyslippers · 13/11/2021 12:04

I’m going back a few years now but when I was about 8 I spotted an ornament I loved in a shop and thought it would be lovely for my mums birthday

I save up for weeks to buy it (I got £1 a week and I think it was about a tenner)

I proudly bought it,got it home and wrapped it up

The big day rolls round and she unwraps it

She make a huge fuss about how ‘fucking awful’ it was was and ‘you have such shit taste’ (my golden child brothers gifts where always loved)

It went straight to the charity shop-I’m talking within a few hours

(She never got any better with gifts I bought her over the years-best thing I did was to go nc-the charity shop has taken the hit from me not buying her anything)

Worst bit is that there is a vintage charity shop where I live and the rotten ornament seems to always be there,sat on the shelf mocking me

Still stings

wanttomarryamillionaire · 13/11/2021 12:23

@VitalsStable

This is brilliant

Hairwizard · 13/11/2021 12:45

That makes me sad reading posts where your younger child self saved up and tried hard to get something thoughtful only to be shamed and made to feel bad.

I was actually thinking of taking my older 2 to shops and letting them choose something for dp for the craic. I just know they will be so excited to pick something for daddy.

ExPatHereForAChat · 13/11/2021 12:52

When I was about 6 I went to the pound shop to get my younger sister a Teddy for her birthday. I picked a funky red one that had a cape and horns.
Only thing was, it was actually a devil and had the words "Horny Devil" written on it. My mum just laughed.

TaraR2020 · 13/11/2021 12:55

Flight socks

PoshWatchShitShoes · 13/11/2021 12:58

I once bought DH nothing. He said he wanted nothing. It went down very poorly 😂

TaraR2020 · 13/11/2021 13:08

In my defence they were part of a larger, travel themed set of presents but they looked terrible!

Thethreecs · 13/11/2021 13:14

When my eldest sister's, baby had her 1st birthday (there's 10 years between us), I was saving my pocket money to buy a present, I got a brain wave to buy in the pound shop as I'd get more things for the money. I picked up a doll, a squeaky ball, and bubbles and some other things. My niece loved dolls and loved squeaky things. My sister opened them at the party in front of everyone, I was chuffed thinking I did well. My sister's eyes welled up and I thought it was tears of happiness, she looked at me and said "who gives a young child a doll who's hair comes out (as she's pulling on the hair), and who the fuck buys a dog toy for a child". She flung them in the bin and I was so mortified. Most of the people there were her friends and their kids so I ended up locking myself into the bathroom downstairs crying, while listening to her rant about how mean her family were.

TheChild · 13/11/2021 13:28

Not a Christmas present but a birthday present for me DH. I bought him a blender. He loves cooking and baking and really would have loved a KitchenAid type mixer. For some reason I thought a blender was near enough the same thing.
A few years later I realised, that was a crap gift! And I use the blender more than he does!

user1488622199 · 13/11/2021 13:29

@Stinkyslippers - that’s not a story about you buying a bad gift, that’s a story about your mother being a complete and utter bitch. She didn’t deserve you - I would be proud if my 8 year old showed such thought about a present for me. I hope life has been kind to you since.

@VitalsStable - you are a modern day hero and an evil genius to boot.

mam0918 · 13/11/2021 13:42

My favorite gifts are things my oldest bought when little, sometime his school would have a fair with items donated alongside the tuckshop and he spent his sweet money on me.

A string necklace (but one you buy not make) when he was 5
A bottle of decent perfume (shockingly don't know how) when he was 6
and
A box of chocolate when he was 7

I don't think he's bought me anything in the last 6 years although his dad usually takes him to a jewelry shop and tells him to pick an item that they give to me.

The ones he bought himself all meant so much to me that I want to protect and keep them forever so I never use them, although just realising I probably look like I didn't like them since I never use them which certainly wasn't the thing.

I definitely look batshit keeping a 6 year old unopened box of poundshop chocolates though.

lockdownalli · 13/11/2021 13:55

Years ago I pulled the name of the Team Bitch in office Secret Santa. I bought her a pair of earrings.

She didn't have pierced ears.

I know it's ridiculous but it really made me laugh, and she never knew it was me

callmeadoctor · 13/11/2021 16:04

I was mid 20s and I bought my 2 nephews (15 and 13) a dictionary each..................................... At the time I thought I was helping them with exams (am now mortified of course!)

whoopy1 · 13/11/2021 16:26

My fil was in a Care Home and I didn’t know what to buy him. I thought about getting him a new dressing gown, so asked sil what she thought. She said no, get him a new tie and some real hankies as he always likes to get those. I managed to order some nice quality hankies and had his initial embroidered on them and a really smart tie (which cost more than the dressing gown would have been).

When we visited him on Boxing Day, he opened the parcel and just looked at the tie and hankies, and asked why had we got him those as he had 6 packs of unopened hankies and a drawer full of ties. He then said, why couldn’t we be more thoughtful like sil and showed us the, yes you’ve guessed it, new dressing gown she had got him. Still, I don’t think he should have been such an ungrateful sod!

Sarcobaleno · 13/11/2021 16:30

@lockdownalli

Years ago I pulled the name of the Team Bitch in office Secret Santa. I bought her a pair of earrings.

She didn't have pierced ears.

I know it's ridiculous but it really made me laugh, and she never knew it was me

This made me laugh

Rainbowunicorn76 · 13/11/2021 16:36

Another secret Santa one..... loads of people were buying each other joke presents rather than something nice, EG inflatable Zimmer frame. So I decided that was the way to go. I bought the bloke who's name I pulled out one of those toilet rolls with jokes on it and a couple of other silly novelty gifts.
He didn't see the funny side AT ALL and sat there with a look of disgust on his face for the rest of the gift opening.
I go hot and cold thinking about it still now

kwiksavenofrillsusername · 13/11/2021 16:36

Worst bit is that there is a vintage charity shop where I live and the rotten ornament seems to always be there,sat on the shelf mocking me

What a sad story. You should buy the fucker and smash it. It might be a good form of therapy.

I once bought my grandma a teddy bear from the charity shop when I was a kid, which I thought was just a cute teddy in a dress. I didn’t quite realise that the dress was actually supposed to be a sexy nightie and the ‘let’s go to bed’ slogan printed on the front was suggestive. Also, didn’t spot the red lipstick mark on the arse. Who designs and makes these things????

Rainbowunicorn76 · 13/11/2021 16:39

@Stinkyslippers