Help me bring a little joy to Christmas please

[RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie]

I'm feeling a bit downhearted about this year. The adult dc have said they don't want gifts (although I do still want to get a few) and we're likely to be having our 'family Christmas' on Christmas Eve, so it will probably just be two of us on the actual day.

Ideas for:
ways to make Christmas Day nice

what to maybe eat on the day, since we won't want 'Christmas dinner' two days in a row

how to make it lovely and pass time, without lots of presents to open?

:( As somebody who enjoys choosing and wrapping gifts and is actually currently and luckily financially comfortable enough to be able to buy some nice things, I'm finding it all a bit bewildering!

Things to eat:
Maybe a buffet to graze or do you have a family favourite meal you could have instead.

Could you have a secret santa, that way you could still do a gift swap, there's a game version where you can 'steal' someone elses gift if they get something you want and then they have whatever yours was.

Is it all adults or kids too, do you like board games, I find they always go down well, or you could get something like pretending to grown up of flux for something a bit different. Charades, cheesy but I think it's good. A quiz?

Get dressed up so it feels like an occassion or all wear christmas outfits.

I think you'll still be able to have a lovely day.

There will be 6 of us on Christmas Eve, all adults. A quiz is a good idea, as is a board game. I think charades needs a bigger group? Christmas Eve secret Santa is a great idea. Will suggest that.

Thank you!

I would do leftovers for your Christmas Dinner. I always make Delia's Turkey Flan wwith Leeks and cheese on boxing day and seve it with leftover gravy, bread sauce etc. It is almost better than the 'proper' meal!

We love Christmas Day on our own. We normally have a slow start to the day and a leisurely breakfast before walking the dogs and dropping into the local pub for a wine or 3! We normally eat around 5pm. This year we’re having brie, caramelised onion and pear tart to start, then a seafood platter with different breads, oils, dips and salad with a cheeseboard to finish. We always make a huge effort with the dining table although it’s small and just us with candles and nice champagne/wine. After the years spent running around after the children we really enjoy Christmas Day being just us. We buy each other gifts and open them first thing in the morning and make a huge effort with the gifts we choose for each other.

Please don’t be downhearted, it’s just a new chapter in your life and one to be thoroughly enjoyed. For years we often couldn’t afford to treat ourselves so we more than make up for it now ☺️

Im kind of surprised that your adult children don't want to buy their parents a Christmas gift....there may be more to the story there but seems a bit mean assuming you've spent years buying for them as they grew up. I'd never not buy my parents a gift for birthday or Christmas (unless we were estranged) - after everything they've done for me over the years, seems inappropriate otherwise!

@JamieFrasersBitOnTheSide

We love Christmas Day on our own. We normally have a slow start to the day and a leisurely breakfast before walking the dogs and dropping into the local pub for a wine or 3! We normally eat around 5pm. This year we’re having brie, caramelised onion and pear tart to start, then a seafood platter with different breads, oils, dips and salad with a cheeseboard to finish. We always make a huge effort with the dining table although it’s small and just us with candles and nice champagne/wine. After the years spent running around after the children we really enjoy Christmas Day being just us. We buy each other gifts and open them first thing in the morning and make a huge effort with the gifts we choose for each other.

Please don’t be downhearted, it’s just a new chapter in your life and one to be thoroughly enjoyed. For years we often couldn’t afford to treat ourselves so we more than make up for it now ☺️

Omg, this sounds absolutely blissful. When we start having Christmas on our own once the kids are grown up, I’m doing this!

Make it special by dressing your house, lovely Christmas tree, Christmas candles etc. Have a special Xmas breaky planned, play Michael Buble Christmas album (or whatever your favourite is) and then presumably you can still buy each other gifts, so take turns unwrapping lovely pressies you have purchased for each other! Have a nice walk with mulled wine, have oysters & champagne, maybe go out to a pub in the afternoon for dinner. Watch a special Christmas movie in the evening. Make sure one of your presents to each other is new pyjamas and wear those

Ooh I would have a delicious cheese board and baked camembert instead of Christmas dinner. A nice, relaxing brunch, a long walk & then home looking at all the lit up trees just as it’s getting dark. I hope you still manage to have a lovely day.

Loads of fairy lights

Could you do something like cocktail hour / make your own cocktail or card games with small money bets?

Have a lie in, then laze around in your `pJ’s.
Maybe a full English for brunch, and maybe something like lamb and new potatoes on the day. Or book in at a pub so you can have the day off cooking and treat yourself.

Buy cards against humanity! Good game for the adults.

Get a selection of rubbish gifts and wrap them, deal out a pack of cards. Then using a second card set turn over the first card - the person who matches this card chooses but doesn’t open the gift. The next person either chooses a gift or takes the first persons gift. Keep going. You either have some or no gifts at the end. It gets a bit competitive!

Get yourselves an escape room game. Or plan some board games for two.
Cocktails and nibbles.
A Star Wars binge day / Pirates of the Caribbean / Lord of the Rings / Harry Potter etc.

The first and absolutely essential step is to keep a mindset of aren't we lucky to be having Christmas Day with just the two of us.

Once you get that clear, everything else will follow on.

What do you most like to do together. Are you sociable, early morning drink down a club, or a walk together? Help out at a local crisis centre. Stay in bed all day.

Do exactly what you want and enjoy it.

A filet steak and salad each ?
Mac and cheese ?
Box of delicious chocolates
Jigsaw spear out on the dining table without getting in anyone's way.
Church service?

What did you enjoy doing before DC came along all and filled all your leisure time ?

What's your favourite meal/treat food? Have that on Christmas day. As others have said, this is just a new phase in your life so you need to adapt.

@purpleflowerlegs

Im kind of surprised that your adult children don't want to buy their parents a Christmas gift....there may be more to the story there but seems a bit mean assuming you've spent years buying for them as they grew up. I'd never not buy my parents a gift for birthday or Christmas (unless we were estranged) - after everything they've done for me over the years, seems inappropriate otherwise!

No, you've misunderstood. They want to give us a gift but say they don't want any gifts for themselves.

Thanks, everyone. I actually really like the sound of a walk and a couple of drinks in the pub.

Last year was the 1st Christmas Day my husband and I had been alone since before our sons were born! (eldest is 40). We stayed in our nightwear, drank too much, had a curry with samosas etc. Then we scoffed lots of chocolates, watched what we wanted, had a nice day.

Our sons always say they don't want presents, but I buy them stuff anyway! It's always a bottle of something, books, shirts, some toiletries, something for their homes.

I think one of my problems is that I don't really watch TV. The idea of spending a day in PJs watching stuff is something I'd never do, unless I was ill!

Is the reason they have said they don't want stuff because they are rejecting consumerism/eco conscious? If so there's still so much you could (and should if you can afford to) get them. Pay for a one off deep clean of their house/flat? Tickets for a show/gig that you could go to together? Vouchers for restaurants that they can use later in the year? I totally get the whole 'don't buy me stuff' thing but I would still appreciate any of these things.

Yes, l am the same re tv, l dont have one and have never spent whole day in pjs, its not for me.
Just relax and enjoy the day, dont overthink it, l have a lie in until 9.00 ish and then put some lovely xmas music on, carols etc, shower, potter, see to animals, cook a lovely lunch for myself and two teenage sons, then we often go for a walk over the fields and woods, come back, have an irish coffee and mince pies, chat to family on phone etc, light candles, switch on my many fairy lights inside and out, and just relax. Utter bliss.
Boxing day is a busier day, usually go out and see family, or have them here.

I’d go out, if it’s just the two of you on Christmas Day, why not book a
Lovely place for lunch, no cooking, no washing up! It’ll be a different sort of day than you’re used to but might be quite nice.

My next door neighbour always goes on holiday on Christmas day, she says it so much cheaper to travel, why not book a mini break?

I also love buying and wrapping presents, if that’s something you love to do could you maybe pick a charity like a children’s one and shop and buy stuff normally? They’d obviously be gone before the day itself but I did this last year, found out about a local charity for underprivileged kids and signed up. I was assigned 4 kids and received their wish lists and it was lovely shopping for stuff they wanted! (Sorry not trying to sound all annoying and virtuous or anything but I am currently living abroad and missing out on buying presents for friends and family so that was a great alternative!)

What are your children doing on Christmas Day and what will they be eating? That would affect what I cooked on Christmas Eve.