Ok if you are bored I will tell you about the conversation I had with a bloke at the bus stop on Tuesday.
It went something like this:-
Bloke (in Suffolk accent) (standing about 2 " away from me): - Well, I'm the oldest of 3 boys, see there's Adam and Terry and Chris, and Chris, well he's reely norty see, he likes putting spiders and worms and things in people's food. he was gonna put a spider in me Mum's tea, but she said If you do that I'll smack you one.
I've got two cats - well I had two but they died, they got run over, so I've got another two, they're called Smudge and Miffy, and Smudge is reely norty he sits in me mum's chair so she can't sit in it.
Have you got any cats?
Me:- No I haven't.
Bloke:- Whoy??
Me:- Well, I'm not really a cat person...
Bloke:- Have you got any dogs?
Me:- No I haven't
Bloke:- Whoy??
Me:- well, I'm not really a dog person...
Bloke:- Birds... have you got any birds?
Me:- No, I don't have any pets at all.
Bloke:- Whoy??
Me:- I'm not really a pet person at all actually.
Bloke:- Well me Mum once had a cat, well you know me Mum had a pan in her kitchen? Well, the cat did a whoopsy, a poo you know, in the pan, and she had to throw it out, it wasn't no good after that.
(Taking a handful of 5p pieces from his pocket) See these? I've been saving them up, I've got a jar at home for them. One time I saved up eleven pound, and another time I saved up twelve pound...
Me:- So what did you buy wit it?
Bloke:- Well, I saved it didn't I?
Me:- Yes, but for what?
Bloke:- Well, I saved it didn't I?
At this point I was mighty relieved when the bloke's mate came back from wherever he had been and took bloke away with him.
Also bloke had very drippy nose which he proceeded to drip over my shopping trolley - bleeeuurrgghh!