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Christmas

From present ideas to party food, find all your Christmas inspiration here.

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Original poster

Is it mad to give 3 year old the 'big' present now?

42 replies

OchNoAgain · 26/08/2021 12:07

Was planning to get 3yo DD a toniebox for Christmas - with some figures it's £100 on sale at the moment so would be a big present for her, with some smaller cheaper presents to go along with it.

The trouble is massively playing up at bedtime at the moment and is desperate to listen to a story at bedtime like her big brother does. He has a CD player and loads of CDs and listens to one each night in bed. I was thinking she could listen to one Tonie character at night before falling asleep and I'm hoping it might improve bedtime.

Is it mad to just do this and then she'd only have the smaller gifts on Christmas morning? Obviously she has no idea what things cost and will be delighted with a plastic Frozen hairband and some playdough tubs...

It feels wrong and indulgent somehow!

OP posts:

SmileyClare · 28/08/2021 10:28

The fact is, this isn't just a device to play audio story books, it's the latest "In Toy" for a 3 year-old, complete with figures from their favourite programmes/films.

If the issue is that dd won't settle at bedtime then that can easily be solved by without giving her this big present she will no doubt be over the moon to receive. Why not find a CD player for her like her brother has? You could probably get one free.

And yes, I do think it's unfair on her brother. There isn't a need for her to have her present early.

Maggiesgirl · 28/08/2021 10:32

We use an Alexa ans audible.co.uk for books at bedtime for DGD. Managed to get a Alexa for 18.00 quid in a sale. She us linked into my audible account so I can buy her books from it. Sometimes I buy them with a credit other times if I see them cheap. You can also get lots free under the audible plus now.

crimsonlake · 28/08/2021 10:50

I also hope the audible recording is in addition to you reading to them at bedtime. I used to love reading to mine and now they are proper grown ups I would love to go back in time and be able to do it again.
I have also been known back in the days of blank cassettes to record stories read by my voice for them to listen to. This was always to supplement never to replace.

ViceLikeBlip · 28/08/2021 11:00

I would just give it to her now. If the older brother kicks up a fuss, I'd just say I got it cheap on fb marketplace 😉 And then get her a normal amount of cheaper presents for Xmas so she feels she's had a "proper" Xmas, but you've stayed on budget.

In fact, when mine were little (and two of mine have bdays within a couple of months of xmas) I would occasionally get them "big" items just because it's what they wanted/needed right then. I don't mean I just chuck money at them all the time, but things like bikes- I've always bought secondhand, and my kids weren't particularly keen on learning to ride anyway, so they just got them at a convenient time.

MobyDicksTinyCanoe · 28/08/2021 11:02

You can get kids cd players for around £10 and packs of story cds really cheaply on the works. What about something like that? It sounds like she's bright enough to understand plus you have a cheap back up for holidays etc.

Abraxan · 28/08/2021 11:04

@mam0918

I feel like I have fallen into a world of madness, you do know you can just sit and read to your kids right?

its completely free

I didnt even know these existed but it seems so sad to me, bedtime stories are such a bonding time between kids and parents (especially woking parents or school aged kids that dont get to spend all day together) and a keystone in developing a love of books so that passing it off to a machine is a really sad state of the world right now.

I always wondered what people are on about when they say christmas is about the 'gift of time' not presents but if parents no longer take the time to read to and tuck their kids into bed then Im starting to see what they mean.

Your attention shouldnt be a 'gift' and neither should something that replaces it.

You know it's possible to do both, right?

TakeYourFinalPosition · 28/08/2021 11:07

Absolutely get it if you want to and think it’ll help.

But it won’t be a Christmas present in August. You can make the decision to get it now and then try to bulk out her presents with cheaper things in December, but this won’t be a Christmas present, it just can’t be in August.

LucyFox · 28/08/2021 11:30

What about a letter a few days before from Father Christmas to say that the elves have been really busy this summer and have just finished making a present - he was looking forward to giving this to her at Christmas but they are running out of space in the workshops to store everything so he wondered if she would like it now? If Mummy & Daddy agree then he could deliver it next week (but it will have to come by post because the sleigh is being repainted ready for Christmas & the reindeer are still on their summer holidays in the Swedish forests before they come back home to start their intensive flight preparation)

(Then for Christmas he could bring her another story or two for it? And another letter that will help remind her that he brought it early ...?)

You will have to be VERY surprised by a letter from Father Christmas in September!

Givemeallthegin8 · 28/08/2021 11:38

Don’t say it’s a Christmas present though , it’s august . That would be complete madness

Original poster

OchNoAgain · 28/08/2021 16:02

Ah yes, the purchasing of a speaker that plays age-appropriate stories to young children using fun character shapes, the tell-tale sign of totally negligent parenting

I'm trying to buy something for my daughter that she will love and that is in no way harmful to her. I just want to know when is best to give it to her. I judge my own parenting harshly enough, I really could live without condescension and judgement from strangers based on absolutely nothing.

OP posts:

SmileyClare · 28/08/2021 20:54

I'm sorry that the comments here upset you Op.

I suppose the point is that there's not really a pressing need to present your dd with her new toy now. It's not something she actually "needs" right now. There probably are some other options you could try first so you could save her lovely present for Christmas.

However, it's up to you. I'm not sure you need to complicate this by dressing it up as a Christmas present. She certainly won't really understand the concept of an early present?

But it would be sensible to deduct it from her Christmas budget if money's tight. Toddlers won't grasp the concept of money so this is more with the family finances in mind I'm guessing?

I do remember how difficult and exhausting 3 year-olds can be so I can understand why you're hoping this device will solve her bedtime issues!

Helenluvsrob · 28/08/2021 20:56

In theory yes. As long as in no way can it be interpreted as a reward for playing g up.

Helenluvsrob · 28/08/2021 20:58

When they were small the kids got what they needed along the way and mainly a stocking at Xmas. They get so much anyway it didn’t matter

BunnyBerries · 29/08/2021 19:15

OP, either a Tonie or Yoto is a wonderful gift at any time of year. Any child would be lucky to have one.

You honestly don't need to wait until Christmas. Christmas isn't all about gifts. Or about competition between siblings. We gave a Yoto player for 4th birthday. It was basically ignored that day as it was small, for the other cheaper flashier sweets and toys. In the following days though it has been loved and used EVERY single day. Age 4, for example they can read cards and sit in their own room to play and use the player without help. We always have read books ourselves to our children every night, the Yoto is used for cards in the day and only used on occasional nights to listen to the free daily short 5 min educational podcast or 'jokes Friday' together before we read books. It also has a birthday shout out you can email in for. On nights where they are not sleepy, you can turn on the free sleep radio (normal radio in the day) which plays lullabies and orchestral versions of popular songs. It also has a clock that turns from moon into a sun at a time you set on the app, and a nightlight if you turn it on its side that you can choose colours for on the app.

Good luck choosing one (Tonie or Yoto). Some people here have no idea of the amazing functions they have, the world has moved on and children learn tech, and coding and gadgets use young!

BunnyBerries · 29/08/2021 19:17

(Oh and you can make your own cards for Yoto, maybe you can do that with Tonies but I don't know anything about those)?

TheFairPrincess · 29/08/2021 22:44

I wouldn't do this, I know DC have no concept of value but you do, your other child might and if it is something that would be a real "wow" I would save it til Christmas.

My DC have a CD player that cost about £20 from a supermarket. I have also put Audible on a phone or tablet, and if you have apps like Spotify there are even completely free bedtime stories (e.g. the nightly bedtime stories podcast).

I would save the present for Christmas

ItsAllBlahBlahBlah · 30/08/2021 17:27

Personally I would wait. As PP said if I brought DS a big present now I'd end up buying something else in December as the pile would look small, the spend would seem small, they'd need something else... Plus I would worry its rewarding bad behavior too. I'm sure she will love it whenever she recieves it though

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