Christmas for teens?

[Lovemusic33]

DC’s are 15 and 17 (will be almost 16 and 18). Trying to scale down Christmas, neither of them need anything, they both have iPads and phones, dd1 has a games console and a lap top which she doesn’t use, neither of them are into clothes, both have ASD and their rooms are full of the things they collect (lego and pokemon).

Big birthdays next year for all of us, big 40 for me and 16 and 18 for them so we are thinking of a weekend or week away to celebrate in the new year.

Dd2 is mentally quite young, still loves Lego (big sets) and a few toys, dd1 into tech but has everything so I was planning on just getting dd2 one big Lego set and maybe giving dd1 cash?

They are used to getting quite a lot to open but dd1 isn’t really bothered and ends up not touching most things I buy her, she now has her own money as is receiving PIP so tends to buy things when she needs/wants them.

How do you make Christmas special for your teens and have you scaled right back as they have got older?

Days out are tricky as neither like busy places, we go on a city shopping trip in October but I don’t think they would like going any closer to Christmas. Pantomime or theatre trips are a no go too as DD2 can’t cope (she’s more severely autistic). How do you make it special without buying too many gifts?

Is driving on the cards? That could be a good option for the older DD.

If not I would have been happy with cash at that age. Any interest in investing? You could buy them shares in something.

In terms of making it special, go all out on the food.

A full day of whatever their favourite things are to eat! I loved the food around that age at Christmas.

The best bit was going to the shop to chose what cheeses I wanted for my cheese board.

@redtshirt50

Is driving on the cards? That could be a good option for the older DD.

If not I would have been happy with cash at that age. Any interest in investing? You could buy them shares in something.

We are considering it, dd1 has dyspraxia so would need to learn in a automatic, she has a disability car (which I drive), I would like her to learn but I’m not sure if it will be possible with all her conditions

We usually have dominoes Christmas Eve as that’s Dd1’s favourite food, her diet is quite restrictive so food isn’t always enjoyable. She does love cheese though, so we will probably go to the local farm shop to choose some.

Mine are younger (12 and 14) and NT but facing similar issues - they have all the tech they need, not into clothes, no space for more toys / collectibles!

In terms of presents we will get them things like Beano/Dandy annuals (a tradition!), nice food, new PJs or onesies, stationery etc. Their top presents from last Christmas were Oodies. They will also get some money to spend on online gaming.

Our local National Trust places usually have lovely Christmas lights up so we will visit those if they're running (all cancelled last year). Last Christmas we couldn't visit grandparents so also hope that will be possible this year

How about involving them in the planning like a 12 days of christmas bucket list?

It doesn't have to be extravagant just things they want to do over christmas eg family lego evening / competition (Christmas theme), christmas movie marathon with takeaway pizza, walk around the neighbourhood to find the best decorated house, make and wrap gift box for local food bank etc..

You can start with a few ideas of what you think they would like and then get them to add in their own ideas.

Oodie was a big hit here last year too. Dd1 loves a stocking fulled of tat (probably likes it’s more than big presents).

We do have national trust places near by that do light displays so I will try and get tickets (they sell out quickly).

I have a restricted eater too so we make Christmas and other celebrations special with table cloths, dishes and decorations.

By normal standards I go overboard on this - we have different table settings for Christmas Eve meal, North Pole breakfast, Christmas dinner and then use Christmas cloths until new year. But it compensates for the lack of variety in his food.

I have severe DCD (dyspraxia) and only did automatic because no one would support me in learning in a manual - downside automatic cost a lot more from lessons to car costs.

I have actually driven manual cars on private land plenty of times and can do it ok, if I had support to teach me I think I easily could have passed manually (I have a manual motorbike license so can deal with gears).

The DVLA state that its not a disability that effects driving and we can take any driving test and as long as we pass we are classed the same as everyone else.

@mam0918

I have severe DCD (dyspraxia) and only did automatic because no one would support me in learning in a manual - downside automatic cost a lot more from lessons to car costs.

I have actually driven manual cars on private land plenty of times and can do it ok, if I had support to teach me I think I easily could have passed manually (I have a manual motorbike license so can deal with gears).

The DVLA state that its not a disability that effects driving and we can take any driving test and as long as we pass we are classed the same as everyone else.

Thanks, I’m not sure if she would be able to drive or not but we would like to try, it’s hard finding a understanding driving instructor and most are booked up. Dd has Aspergers, Dyspraxia, hypermobility and hypertonia so she may not be able to drive without a few adaptions. Cost of a car isn’t a worry as she has a mobility car funded by her PIP mobility, it is a automatic (most are now), at the moment I drive the car but if she passed she could drive it. She’s unsure if she wants to drive be ideally she needs to as we live rurally and she wants to look for work in a years time. I will see if I can find a instructor.

I try to buy things they wouldn't ordinarily get for themselves. Doesn't have to be big or expensive, just thoughtful. My sister is very good at things like this - she has bought a death Star cookie jar filled with sweets, t-shirts from favourite films, just little things that people tend not to get for themselves. We also do stockings full of really unusual sweets that they don't buy the rest of the year. I got adult DS a heated massage seat one year because he works ft and has games console, games, phone etc. Expensive trainers are my 'go to' if I can't think of anything else - my teens can never have enough shoes!

NT older teens here but things they have loved in last few years for Xmas have been - heated blankets, going out for breakfast, little hamper of treats from Japan, painting by numbers adult (great over lockdown) having a few family friends over for some silly drinks/party games, pub early Xmas eve with us and another close family, choosing bath bombs from lush (started when kids)
With my sister and hers one year we also went to a town with lots of charity shops, small £5 budget to find either a bargain or cheesiest gift we could find. Was very funny and all for a good cause.

Cash for DD1 and lego set for DD2 sound good, imo. If you want to add something to the list then maybe a family experience instead of a physical gift would work better? Are there any fun places like trampolines or air tubes or fun art classes that you can attend together and have fun time?
There are also plenty of digital stuff to do at home, like creating a Youtube slideshow with family photos and music to send to other relatives or making custom calendars to print out and have in their rooms, etc. Could be fun for the older DD who loves tech and computer stuff.
Christmas photo shoot at home is also fun especially if you all come up with some costumes or even book a photographer and have a whole family shoot.

Pokémon have some 25th celebration items coming out which they may be an idea for them

Thank you, I think dd1 wants a new polemon game that comes out in November (there's 2 of them 8 think) bit her dad will probably get it for her and she will buy the other with her own money as she wants ot as soon as its out.

Family experiences are good but we generally go out a lot anyway.

Dd2 likes things to open but I want to reduce tue amount I buy, hopefully she will be happy with a lego set and a few other bits that she needs (clothes/trainers). Dd1 is always happy with cash but I feels wrong her not having much to open. Christmas day is pretty low key anyway as we usually spend ot just the 3 of us, food is tricky as they both have sensory issues around food and I'm lactose intolerant 😬.