Childfree couple and buying presents

[helloxhristmas]

Best mate is child free, she always buys presents for my kids. We agreed to stop gifts between us years and years ago, before I had kids.

She buys for my kids because she loves them and enjoys it but I feel bad that I'm not reciprocating it. She won't ever have kids so it's not like I can reciprocate at any point.

Do I buy for her and her partner again, but will that then make them buy for me again?

I'd buy a token gift from the kids. Chocolates or wine etc

I was childfree and single for a long time and bought two of my friends kids presents for a long time.
I do so because I loved them and one is my god daughter.

If your children are still young and do craft stuff, they could make her a special Christmas card and include a small token gift from them - eg hand cream or small box of posh chocs, home made biscuits,

You can reciprocate in other ways, pay for coffee and cake, when we can do these things freely again, make sure the kids give her a birthday card.
The thing that most irked me was not getting a thank you, a text or a phone call would have been nice. Lack of appreciation or just acknowledgement that a present had been received combined with a total lack of interest when I adopted my son is what ended it for me

I buy for my children's god parents whether they have children that I buy for or not. I send it from my DCs.

Talk to her. I think commication is key here.

Wow @Ted27 exactly the same here.

One friend has three kids, I struggled for fifteen years with infertility. Had Dd and she said oh let's stop gifts now, they get so much. I had done every Christmas and birthday.

Also agree re thank you cards or notes. I know not everyone does them but really love receiving them and made a huge difference to me.

One of my best friends does the same but she does also buy for me and DH. I always tell her she doesn’t have to but she insists she wants to, so I make sure to get her and her DH nice gifts, so the value is pretty equal.

Get the kids to bake her a cake

I agree that it’s not the money, it’s the appreciation. Something like a tin of biscuits or pairs of silly socks obviously chosen by the children with a nice card would be fine.

Yes get her something to open "from the kids". A nice tin of biscuits or chocs or something. Keep it small and say we're still keeping the agreement, it's just the kids are old enough to join in a bit now or something.

A friend of ours used to buy for the children so I used to reciprocate with a gift to her from the DCs. Now she has a DD so I buy for her DD instead (my DCs are adults now so they don't get a gift now)

Maybe buy her a gift for from your DC?

I dont have kids and buy a couple of friends kids presents. One friend I exchange gifts with the other one I dont. I see it as a totally separate thing so I wouldn't start buying for her again, I do appreciate a homemade card from the kids though if they are into doing it!

Thanks all, will get the kids to make something:)

I don't have children.

I buy for birthdays (currently up to about 15 kids I buy for). I don't exchange presents with their parents anymore and I'm very clear I buy for the kids because I like doing so and don't expect gifts in return.

My love of a thank you note/ drawing is well known and I usually get them!

However, several families do buy me a present from the children periodically citing the fact that I spend money on their kids and don't get in return and they think it's unfair. Sometimes it is something daft but very me and sometimes something fairly expensive. Whatever it is it is always appreciated. And I always write the kids a thank you note!

Token gift from the kids.

I'm childless and I get upset that I buy everyone's kids presents but get nothing in return. Just like if you have a present to a friend you do it because you want to spoil them it also hurtful to get nothing in return.