Buying for someone who saves everything "for best".

[HotSince63]

What can I buy for a 66 year old woman who saves everything "for best", which basically means nice perfume languishes in a cupboard and eventually goes off, champagne doesn't get drank and lives in the garage for some mythical 'special occasion' that never happens, a cashmere scarf and gloves only gets used once a year, gorgeous candles are left unlit until they don't even smell any more, lotions and potions don't get opened and gather dust in the bathroom.

I'm all out of ideas - please help me!!

A hamper of food she will eat.
Nice biscuits, mince pies etc.

Family picture or a print/painting.

A grow your own seed or bulb kit with a lovely pot

Any idea where sis selling the bulb in a pot things? I looked in tesco asda and B and M and havent seen any

@RememberSelfCompassion

Any idea where sis selling the bulb in a pot things? I looked in tesco asda and B and M and havent seen any

Debenhams do, Morrisons usually do but haven't looked yet this year

Magazine subscription?
Or a book?

Or flowers? My mum has sometimes sent me a huge box of scented narcissi from the scilly isles - she usually sends them to arrive around 12th night as a thank you for hosting Xmas and it’s lovely to fill vases with scented spring flowers just as all the decorati9ns are coming down,

M&S are good for bulbs and plant basket things.

Fab don't have a morrisons but will look in M and S . We just happened to have been looking for one in the supermarket!

A flower subscription from Bloom and Wild - flowers through the letterbox one a month - you can do just 3.
Nobody can keep flowers for best!

And the scented narcissi a pp mentioned are lovely - a co. called Fentongollan do them from Cornwall, too.

A bouquet of flowers, a good book and a bar of nice chocolate

Can you book an 'experience' like posh afternoon tea somewhere, or fancy restaurant? Then said person can wear their perfume etc which they save for 'best' to such an occasion!

Flowers. I've had those boxes of narcissi too and they're so cheerful, make you think that spring is on its way.
Or food. Or vouchers for somewhere fairly ordinary like John Lewis.
Not an 'experience': they won't get round to booking it.

I just at wouldn’t bother tbh 😂 we stopped buying anything for mil because of this - it’s just so wasteful

We found a beautiful food hamper we got her 2 years ago at the back of the cupboard all out of date recently - it cost a fair bit! She’s not even appreciative of any of it tbh so we just stopped 😂

But maybe get practical things if you must buy something

I got my parents a digital photo frame this year

Or usually il just take them out for afternoon tea or for dinner some time in lieu of gift

Window bird feeder and bird seed?
If you get food it has to be fairly everyday, so eg: cheese and crackers might work but not fancy chutney or it won't get opened.
If they cook, an new pan/baking trays (they can still keep the old ones too, if they must!)
Pot plant
Ready framed family photo or picture of eg: where they got married/went on honeymoon etc. (Maybe as a jigsaw if they do jigsaws)
Calendar/diary
Voucher for clothes shop where they could buy everyday clothes/pants if they'd rather (m&s etc)
Big box of stamps and assorted birthday cards and blank cards for all genders/ages to save them having to go to the shops.

Jigsaw with a personalised image of grandchildren or family on it

I'm a reformed 'keep for best' person, or maybe a partially reformed one. I think it's a throwback from childhood.
Things that worked for me were a pot plant that's easy to look after (succulents are a good bet), something consumable linked to a hobby, or something nice but not so nice it would tip into their 'for best' category.

Thank you - some good ideas here.

I had already wondered about doing a hamper with some nice but not too fancy stuff. You're right about flowers - can't keep them for best! A magazine subscription might be a good idea too.

We've done gift vouchers for a restaurant and experience before now, and they never got used because there was never an occasion 'best' enough to book it. They sheepishly admitted when pushed, that the vouchers had expired.

@Heyahun I'm nearly at the point of not bothering in future. It actually irritates me when I find these things that I've bought, not used and fit for nothing but the bin.

@LolaSmiles I had a "we must save nice things for best" childhood and I hated it - it's made me the complete opposite as an adult - I use, wear, enjoy, eat, drink, burn (the candle) everything every day.

She admires objects in our house, or my perfume, or whatever, and says "oh that's so lovely" or "you're so lucky, I'd love (to own) that" and then once I get it for her it doesn't get used/worn. I feel like I'm wasting my money.

Op it’s like you’re talking about my mother! I didn’t know other people did it too! It’s frustrating and sad that she doesn’t get to enjoy the things she is given 😢

This is my MIL and I’m currently reforming DH.
Ive found it best to not buy anything too nice. For example if she wants slippers I’ll buy a cheap pair from Tesco and tell her when she opens them they’re from Tesco and cheap. She loves that she’s got new slippers, and there’s no stress about wearing them.
Once I bought MIL a candle and said I was going to light it every time I came over, and if she wanted to light it any time in between that was fine too. Once I’d started using it, it was no longer ‘for best’ and she admitted she loved having a candle - even bought herself a cheaper one after it finished!!

Or you can just buy very practical gifts, or things that won’t get ‘used up’
Plants and plant pots for the garden, or some diy things.
‘upgrade’ something in her house that she needs like a kettle or something.
A fruit basket that will go mouldy in a few days

..good luck