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Christmas

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Original poster

Okay then, these charity goats. Let's have a heated debate

59 replies

CappuScreamO · 16/10/2007 11:29

I don't agree with buying them for people

I think if you want to give money to charity that should be your own responsibility and you should buy yourself a charity goat

but giving charity goats to people as presents seems a bit 'ooh aren't I good and beyond reproach and you can't complain that you have no gift because that will make you look grasping and mean'

I give money to charity at Christmas myself

but I buy my friends and family presents out of love hoping that they will bring them joy

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MaryBleedinShelley · 16/10/2007 11:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Boco · 16/10/2007 11:57

I would like actual gifts from friends and families with good taste and goats from friends and families with poor taste / little imagination.

morningpaper · 16/10/2007 11:58

RE: the wedding thing:

After getting married in our surprise wedding in the summer I was very curious as to whether people really would ASK to buy us something ("People WANT to give!" is always the argument given for people who have wedding gift lists)

Only THREE people asked at all (we had 100 or so on the day) - all 3 were over 60. One was grandparents so I said they could give us £20 for a new saucepan, which they did. The other was a friend and I said we would like a cutting of a plant from her garden. The other insisted on giving us money which we spent on an evening out to celebrate.

No one under 60 asked to buy us anything - and I really don't think most people WANT to give at all. Most people are just happy to celebrate and offer congratulations. And I think that's lovely.

Dropdeadfred · 16/10/2007 11:59

My brother bought goats, prize bull semen and lots of other supposedly weird and wacky charity gifts for the whole family.....funny how he didn't say he was doing it (he also bought them for my dc's)when we asked what him and his wife wanted..

He asked for cds, dvds, chocs and perfume/cosmetics...

artichokes · 16/10/2007 12:00

Cappo "if you are going to give someone charity cash shouldn't you ask them what their favourite charity is rather than foisting yours on them?" - yes, of course you should. in the case of DH and his parents we know their charities. Also DH always donates to the hospice my mum died in. I am not advocating giving goats to people who don't feel passionate about a particular charity (sorry, I know it would be more fun if I was).

morningpaper · 16/10/2007 12:00

RE: Goats

No

I do not want a bloody goat

Yes we've all got too much stuff but I still appreciate a little gift - a book, a home-made card, a photograph, a little necklace or earrings

NOT a goat

artichokes · 16/10/2007 12:01

MartianBishop's post encapsualtes what I was trying to say. Its just she is more eloquent.

SeaShells · 16/10/2007 12:03

I'd like to receive one off the people who mormally buy me rubbish and things that show that they clearly don't know me at all, and I have to smile and pretend I like it, so yeah would like to receieve one.

I wouldn't give them though, think it's more of a smug thing to do for yourself, to feel good about yourself, and not particularly for the person you are buying for.

I would actually love someone to buy me a real goat for myself actually, I've always wanted a pet goat

Blandmum · 16/10/2007 12:05

goats smell imho

Tamum · 16/10/2007 12:05

Agree that it can, in carefully defined circumstances be appropriate but I am Not Keen in general, too sanctimonious.

Original poster
CappuScreamO · 16/10/2007 12:05

my sil always buys us what she thinks we should have, rather than what we ask for, in what seems an attempt at our improvement

eg "can i have a cd by x' and she buys you one by Y, the undiscovered alternative intelligent genius

goats feel very much like the same kind of 'doing you good' kind of present

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mummymagic · 16/10/2007 12:07

Morningpaper,
people did ask us about our list and we said 'oh we have a charity list, or you can donate to charity in our name' but people mostly went and chose their own personal things - like your thoughtful gifts (and we got loads of vouchers - obviously useful, but...). I think it is the 'done' thing, to buy a gift for a wedding. But I agree that people aren't stupid, they can think of something to get you all by themselves.

Like a goat.

newknifenewslainthreadslayer · 16/10/2007 12:08

You can buy me a goat but I want to keep it in my garden, is that ok?

Blandmum · 16/10/2007 12:10

Like any present it can be a hot or miss affair.

I love getting perfume. Other people might be miffed because it is the wrong sort, or 'Does my SIL think I smell?? '

It is just another option.

For me the school meals thing was great, because I teach. I don't know how I would have felt over a goat. I was just rather warm and fuzzy on christmas day with the gift. I didn't feel, 'Gosh what an ace person I am, not to mind', I blubbed because it was such a nice thought.

and a total aside.....we have booked the weekend in Rome, for this weekend. Keep everything crossed for us chaps!

Tommy · 16/10/2007 12:16

My brother and SIL bought us one for Christmas couple of years ago and DS1 really thought they had bought us a goat and was looking forward to it living in the garden.

Try explaining that to a 4 year old

I think they are great but, as everyone else has said, you have to know who to give them to

Blandmum · 16/10/2007 12:19

I wouldn't give them to a child.

Sheherazadethegoat · 16/10/2007 12:20

why does nobody ask the goats?

Wags · 16/10/2007 12:20

MIL got all the grandchildren goats or whatever last year. The older ones (teenages) chose what they wanted to give, books, animals the like. She chose a sheep for my DD and DS who were 3.5 and 1.8 at the time. Tried to explain it to DD, not sure she really 'got it'. She also didn't seem to mind not getting a present. I wasn't that put out, but felt a bit miffed that she has spent the best part of 17 years buying presents for the other older grandchildren but chooses now to go all saintly and do the charity bit. She did say that maybe we should all get her a cow or something for her present. We didn't but maybe this year...... ?

Original poster
CappuScreamO · 16/10/2007 12:21

she gave a fecking sheep to a 3 year old?

the woman is a sanctimonious feckwit

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TellusMater · 16/10/2007 12:23

BIL bought PIL a goat the other year. It did not go down well at all. Still, they gave me a plastic microwave omelette maker. I'd rather have had the goat TBH...

Blandmum · 16/10/2007 12:24

It is interesting that most of the people who are a little unhappy over the goat thing, were given them by inlaws.

Do you think that this is because they don't know you that well, so they would know if you would really appreciate a charity gift or not?

I'm lucky in that SIL and I get on very well, so she knows the sorts of things that I like. So when SIL gave me the school dinners I knew that she had thought about it, not just done it to look good herself/ save herself the faff of buying me a 'real' gift.

Blandmum · 16/10/2007 12:24

LOL at the platic omeltte maker!

TellusMater · 16/10/2007 12:25

Not their finest hour. But better than the tea towel set I suppose...

themildmanneredaxemurderer · 16/10/2007 12:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
CappuScreamO · 16/10/2007 12:28

or like dh with the £5 agreement they run out and spend £20 because they 'wanted you to have something nice'

and you have spent £4.81

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