Ideal number of gifts ?

[Bikingbear]

What would you say is your ideal number / amount?

I'm never sure how much I should pad out their piles with 'extras' they will have 6 things from Grandparents/ Aunties.
Stockings in this house are generally filled with novelties whatever I find.

How do people end up with all the presents from friends and family under the tree? Don't you just open them with the friends and family when you see them as and when? I have one friend who always does a present drop off Christmas Eve, and I think they go around all of their friends and family giving and presumably expecting to collect gifts for their kids. It's caught me by surprise a couple of years when I haven't wrapped their presents yet. They are the only people I know that do this though, I have wondered if it's common with other families.

We have got ds age 2 a stocking, one main present (£30) a little book and a small toy and nothing more. Wouldn't change a thing even if we suddenly won loads of money.

I agree with not padding out for the sake of it, although ours have huge stockings there’s not much in there that I’d class as tat. The poly glider definitely is but they all enjoy playing with those and having races while they last and the one year I didn’t put them in there was outrage!

They get spinning tops which I usually get from a local carpenter, these are in a big carved dish on the side and everyone who comes to our house has a play when they see them. Might need to change that tradition soon though as we won’t have room for many more after this year.

There’s a lot of edible stuff which I suppose could be seen as padding out but it’s the kind of treat I don’t really buy so they all love it. Also some of their favourite foods so they don’t have to share (a jar of cornichons, some chai tea, a packet of lotus biscuits...). I know some people think those shouldn’t be presents but my children love getting them.

For my younger ones I get add ons for existing toys where possible so a train for the train set, a small playmobil or Lego set, some happyland animals... I also split multipacks of figures so for some people a pack of pj masks figures would be one gift but for mine it’s 6 separate stocking fillers.

@user686827

How do people end up with all the presents from friends and family under the tree? Don't you just open them with the friends and family when you see them as and when? I have one friend who always does a present drop off Christmas Eve, and I think they go around all of their friends and family giving and presumably expecting to collect gifts for their kids. It's caught me by surprise a couple of years when I haven't wrapped their presents yet. They are the only people I know that do this though, I have wondered if it's common with other families.

We don’t open anything until Christmas Day, so any presents from family and friends go under the tree, it’s how we have always done it.

Between 15-20 including stocking fillers (chocs , book and socks usually) no gifts at ours from family as we see them on the day

3 - 1 from Father Christmas (main present), 1 from us and 1 from sibling.

They also have presents from family and friends

@user686827

How do people end up with all the presents from friends and family under the tree? Don't you just open them with the friends and family when you see them as and when? I have one friend who always does a present drop off Christmas Eve, and I think they go around all of their friends and family giving and presumably expecting to collect gifts for their kids. It's caught me by surprise a couple of years when I haven't wrapped their presents yet. They are the only people I know that do this though, I have wondered if it's common with other families.

Well, they are Christmas presents and therefore opened on Christmas.

Family lives abroad so they normally send parcels and while DH and I check if everything has arrived safely it is tucked away for Christmas.

@Bikingbear - I have teenagers so things like edibles, books, Xbox game, headphones, small items of clothing, bath stuff/cosmetics, jewellery (not the pricey kind), Funko Pop characters. Last year I also put in a new wallet with some money in it. When they were little they would get things like Lego, Sylvanians, lush bath bombs and a small cuddly toy.

I honestly don't think I've ever counted, but it would be quite a lot. Probably too generous but we could afford it and rarely bought anything through the year apart from birthday which is mid year for both.

It's hard to judge really as in my case, DC would get presents from relatives but they were usually money and that doesn't really mean much to a small child so we'd overcompensate. DH and I grew up in poverty with parents who tried but we really really got anything expensive or what we might really want.

Some people on here will buy their DC 3 things and castigate anyone for buying a lot when their parents are getting DC a pony or something. Or they bought the DC a new toy every month. It's really all relative.

If I had my time again, i think I'd cut down a little and make more a thing of birthdays. Don't get me wrong, they'd get gifts on birthdays but usually just a few things.

I think "filler" presents don't have to be tat and can still be things DC want, so things like a tube of pringles, big bag of popcorn, can's pf fizzy juice, jar of nutella, pyjamas, new tubs of playdoh, colouring books, new duvet set etc or instead of a plain new top, they'd get a slightly more expensive one with a character or brand they like, so either stuff they might need or consumables.

I like to do a really good stocking. I put about 8 or 9 things in there.

Under the tree is always 3 things from DH and me - echoing gold, frankincense, and myrrh.

The pets always buy a present for DC too. They often have a knack for sniffing out the kind of tat that DC love but that I would disapprove of.

DC buy for each other too, just little things using their pocket money.

to the OP I think everyone varies so wildly that there isnt really an answer to this question:

I know people like me who do a room full of gifts and people who do the strictly 4 gifts thing and litrally everything in between and people who spent £20 and people that spend £1000 (which can be any catagory, some people spend £500 on one gift and others will get dozens of gifts for £100).

Shear numbers make our xmas sound excessive but its not really, I only spend £110 per child this year and a lot of the things are small/cheap - my toddler is obsessed with bubbles and the a tonne of bubble related toys/game usually real cheap and small that he loves way more than a big expensive gadgets that will break or grow out of quickly etc...

Usually around 10 presents each under the tree and 6 or 7 in their stocking.
I never match what they've had spent on each other as I feel like it has tallied up evenly over the years.

@Marlena1

I once heard "something they want, something they need, something to wear, something to read".

Bingo @Spacerader

We have a teen now and do a stocking for her which we fill with nice things and fun things - this year she'll have lip balms, facemasks (skincare type), makeup brushes, nail polish, pop-tarts, nesquick, lush bath bomb, an apple charger (lost her own and using cheap one ) a mug (we're each getting one with our initials from Anthropologie) chocolate on a stick for hot chocolate, underwear, soft drink - fancy coke - a clear one one year that I ordered from Japan. Chocolate including a coin and a chocolate orange, retro or Japanese sweets

Then she'll get 1 main present - in the past it's been an ipod, then phone, last year airpod pros. These are all v small and we have always put them in the bottom of her stocking so she didn't spot them straight away.

She gets about 10 gifts in total but we don't buy her a gift separately, they all came from 'santa' and we keep up the traditions.

She gets very little from anyone else so we've always been very generous.

Dh grew up in a family who really didn't do santa and placed no emphasis on presents or making it special for the children where as my parents always made a big deal of Christmas even in years when money was tight.

Dh has totally embraced my way of doing things and he loves it as much as I do. Some of our favourite memories are sitting in the sitting room after filling the stocking and placing out the gifts and having a drink and basking in it all. We still do it despite having a teen!

In the past couple of years we've started doing stockings for each other too and the pets have always had a stocking - dd insisted when she was small.

We both love finding small but thoughtful things to put in the stockings - this year dh will have new socks, an initial mug, rare whiskey minatures, liquer chocolates, a tshirt, L'Occitane Shower gel, L'Occitane shaving foam, a big toblerone, chocolate florentines, special chilli sauce, a fancy air freshner for his car

I will have a similar level of things in mine - small prosecco, mug, socks, a beautiful glass, a book etc

I really LOVE doing the stockings!

12 stocking gifts from FC and I try to do 12 from us. But some are very small like a book, or craft stuff.

@FortunesFave

Marlena I always thought that was the most po-faced advice ever.

What? So...one gift they want, then some bloody shoes and a book?

How completely Dickensian. It's good advice if you're rolling in cash and your kids have everything they could possibly want or need...but for most people, Christmas is a time for some treats.

It could also be good advice for people not rolling in money too. It's not Dickensian, it's moderate. If you/we don't want to follow that then we needn't, we all have different incomes and idea of 'that's enough'.

This bit not geared at you but in general; I think we should be more tolerant of other people's views on presents/Christmas and stop projecting so much.

Whatever you can afford. I have 6 presents for my two younger sisters and won't be buying anything more for them.

If it gets to the point that even the Christmas tree is covered by presents as in the doc Christmas excess it's way too much.

*together

user686827 Things end up under the tree because Santa delivers them. In my house he keeps them save out the reach of prying little fingers and delivers with the help of his Elves. He delivers, like the Postman, but not everything is from Santa.

I'm thinking I'm in the sweet spot by aiming for about 10 things from us. As others have pointed out little extras don't need to be complete junk.

My daughters will get far too much but its all used and appreciated.

We do 1 gift from santa and a sack of stocking fillers (mostly things they need or edible bits like tube pringles, sweets or craft activities and bath bombs etc) all things I'd buy over Christmas anyway.

Then a pile from us, they never really have an expensive main gift, its all bits and pieces. So this year my youngest is mostly dolls and my eldest clothes and funko pop figures. Ive spent a little more this year as we will save on the panto/visiting santa etc and they were so good during lockdown even though they both found it very hard. Do what you feel is right, some will say mine get too much but I dont buy anything outside of christmas/birthday. They don't have pocket money or have magazines or anything when I go shopping. Even a new backpack/lunchbox I buy for Christmas rather than at the start of the school year.

When there were Santa believers, we'd do a small stocking (chocolate orange, chocolate coins, dvd, 1 or 2 little things) then downstairs there were 5-7 bigger unwrapped presents also from Santa. Then a few from parents mostly books or clothes and a present from siblings. We've got a massive family on one side so the Xmas night gathering there would be a present from Granny and 1/4 aunties. This was brought in after we witnessed the carnage of 10 overtired children unwrapping 4 presents each after 12 hours of excitement. During the year they would still have got clothes or books but toys were only really for christmas and birthdays or holidays.
Now as they're 16, 23, 25 we still do a Santa stocking and 5ish more presents from parents and siblings as well as about £200 each but you don't get a Granny or auntie present if over 18.

I have a budget and the amount of gifts fit into that. When they were younger they'd get a fair few but now they're older the amount of gifts are getting a lot smaller.