Christmas and birthday cash in an envelope for kids?

[CashForQuestions]

Last year I gave up wife work and refused to remember birthdays, buy presents, or send cards to any of DP's family members.

As predicted, this year no-one in his family has received birthday cards.

His plan is to put cash in a money wallet for each of his nephews/nieces and call it birthday and Christmas cash combined. The amount would be equivalent to what we'd give for birthday and Christmas so probably £50 or £60 each (covering £25-£30 for birthday and £25-£30 for Christmas).

The kids are 12, 6 and 4. For context, we are not at all close to these kids or their parents.

DP is now convinced that his idea is the best idea ever and that these kids would rather get a big amount once a year than that value split over two celebrations. I don't agree but we don't have children ourselves so its just opinion based on very little really.

So, parents, is this a bad idea? Or a good idea? I guess its kind of a moot point because it's going to happen but I'm just interested.

I’d much prefer cash to an unwanted gift.

@TiceCream Oh, I completely agree. My suggestion was to get them a box of sweets/chocolates so they've got something to open then cash.

I guess my question is more about whether combining birthday and Christmas cash into one is better than getting two lots of cash (one at birthday, one at Christmas)?

Cash is good and will please all kids but nicer to get it in a birthday card on your birthday and in a Xmas card at Xmas.

Separate card and cash at birthday and Christmas better, IMO.

I think you need to seperate the money and not just give it at Christmas. Otherwise they might expect more money on their birthdays too.

Why doesn't he just wait until they are 16/18 and then give them £1000 for all previous b-days/Christmases?

I started this last year.
We never see the children and dh isn’t bothered remembering. It’s also a bit risky sending money by post.
I wrap a personalized chocolate bar with £50 in their card.

The kids are delighted because they can get a big thing in the sales for that amount.
My kids didn’t get birthday cards this year so they must be doing the same for us.

He's just being fucking lazy - and also inconsiderate. These are children, for heavens sake! They should know that their family members care enough about them to remember their individual birthdays.

I wouldn’t send cash through the post, write a cheque their parents can cash for them.

Some aunts and uncles don’t bother with Xmas or birthday presents at all.

It is a practical solution to a common problem (forgetting individual's birthdays) and as a mum I can tell you mine would prefer the cash in one go.

Why doesn't he just wait until they are 16/18 and then give them £1000 for all previous b-days/Christmases?
This was his suggestion when I said I was giving up wife work!

I wouldn’t send cash through the post, write a cheque their parents can cash for them
Sorry, I didn't mean cash through the post, envelope of cash would be given to PILs who'd pass it on to the parents of these children.

He's just being fucking lazy - and also inconsiderate. These are children, for heavens sake! They should know that their family members care enough about them to remember their individual birthdays
No disagreements from me about this.

My DC 10+8 would be happy to receive the lump sum

Cash is cash whenever it's received.

Cash is king for kids

Thank you everyone

Cash is fine but I think he should give it on their birthdays and Christmas separately. The point is to make the dc feel you are thinking about them!

I think birthdays and Christmas should be treated separately.

And I think a 4 and 6 year old would prefer an actual present to cash.

Yep, I completely agree that birthdays and Christmases should be separate but DP can't be arsed to remember when the birthdays are.

Well it doesn't sound like they're that close. So they're lucky to get anything.
Honestly a decent bit of cash should be appreciated whenever it's given.