Spending different amounts on each child?

[TCody]

I have 3 DSSs (15, 14 and 12) and 3 DS’s (6, 6 and 3).

We have spent a lot more on my DSS’s for Christmas, though amount wise it looks fairly similar as the things the younger boys have are generally bigger.

I thought this was quite normal but when speaking to a friend today she was really surprised and quite insistent that I should be spending the same amount on all the children.

I really don’t see the point in spending more on the younger boys for the sake of it but after speaking to my friend I’m stating to doubt myself!

If you have kids of varying ages do you spend a similar amount on presents or does it differ?

I have a ten year old and six year old my ten year old loves Nintendo switch and has asked for a £45 game I said he can have it but not much else he is cool with that my six year old likes dinosaurs I'm not spending £45 on a dinosaur

I've tried really hard since dd2 was born (dds 9/nearly 10 and 7) yo spend the same and have same number of gifts and it's worked out well, but they were young and wanted cheap bits. This year there there seems to be a big difference in dd1- she has grown up!! Doesn't really want toys. We are getting her a laptop which she will love, love, love. Dd2 still wants toys- the 2 kego sets she wants were in the sales so I got one for 35 and one for 20££. Decided I'm not buying for the sake of it, bith dds have what they want and will love and that to me makes it equal. Dd2 will no doubt get a laptop when she is around the same age but if she got one this year she wouldn't be in the slightest bit interested and if she got 600£ worth of toys she would be so overwhelmed she would have a meltdown and the day would be ruined!!

I spend totally different amounts on my kids (7 and 2) but get them similar amount of things and try to ‘match’ them (eg a book each, an item of clothing each, some art supplies each, a toy each). Older child tends to have more expensive taste! Little kids are more easily pleased with several cheap bits but older kids/teens will prefer something more expensive, if you spend £££ on a games console/laptop/whatever for a teenager it would be silly to try to spend the same amount on toys for a small child because they’d end up with so much stuff just for the sake of trying to match how much you’ve spent!

DC's are 17, 16 and almost 9. Each get the same number of gifts but so far this year One DC is over budget by 145 one is under by 50!

I think teens just are more expensive than toddlers. Also how do you calculate something like a phone? I’m getting ds2 a new one for Christmas, it can often be £0 upfront cost, but then a monthly fee.. Whereas if ds1 wants trainers, I’m paying the full price in the shop. They get similar stocking fillers (sweets, socks, pants, nice toiletries etc) and then a couple of “big” presents, but that’s as much as I’d do to keep it even.

Hard to spend large amounts of money in the smaller ones, and they grow out of the toys so fast. Even the classic Christmas present of a bike is much cheaper for a three year old than a twelve year old.

The little ones won’t notice and neither will the older ones. As long as they all have similar amounts of presents to open.

You house must be mental though - six boys😂😂

I would lay money your friend doesn't have children with your age gap. It'll even out over time as your little ones grow up. Of course you need to be fair but fair overall through their childhood, not spending £400 on a baby because a 15 year old needs a laptop.

Have each of the DCs got something that they will enjoy? Does it seem as if they are all getting a nice present?

If DSC1 wanted something costing £££ but very small, while DSC2 wanted something quite large but actually only costing £, would it be unfair to get them exactly what they wanted (if the budget allowed for both)? Or would it be fairer to get both what they wanted but getting extra for DSC1 as their item was only small - or is it that DSC2's larger pile would be made larger to balance out the money element?

That's just to take out the DSC/DC equation entirely!!

As long as each DC - whether DSC or DC - each gets something that shows them that someone is thinking about them in particular, their likes and needs, and has got them something with them individually in mind - then I don't think the spending needs to match for each D(S)C - nor that the size of present needs to match - but that each feels valued as a person and that someone knows what they like and dislike and has tried to get them something good for them.