Christmas our/your way?

[3littlemincemeatpies]

Just been reading an other thread and love hearing how other families enjoy their Christmas’s. So many variations on traditions and the way things are done, no right or wrong in it but I guess because it’s an important, special time for most families we become quite protective and defensive over the way we do it and it got me thinking that some of the things we do might seem alien to someone else for example we....

Don’t hang stocking on our bed, two of my girls (while they absolutely loved Christmas Eve and the excitement of it) were pretty scared of Santa coming into their room and were much happier if the stocking got left downstairs with everyone else, MIL has to get her tuppence in every year about what a strange tradition that is and how I’m breaking a long line of tradition from DH’s side!!

Everything comes from Santa in our house, apart from presents from grandparents, Aunts and Uncles. I’m more than happy for Santa to take all the credit and I don’t think there is anything more magical than Santa with a big sack of presents on his back and ready fo drop off.

Stockings are a free for all but sack presents are opened taking turns. We started this a few years ago and it’s actually my 3 girls that keep it going now. It makes present opening last longer and think they are a lot more aware of what they are opening rather that tearing the paper off, chucking gift to the side and going NEXXXXT!!! We also have a break before we do presents under the tree and traditionally get dressed up, open more fizz and have some posh nibbles while doing them. On top of that we also have presents for the table, sometimes a main thing, other years something thoughtful.

We always have a trick present (another one my MIL doesn’t get) Santa leaving a doll in the freezer the year my middle asked for the talking Elsa, dove soap bars wrapped up beautifully at the table last year, which my eldest two couldn’t wait to get their hands on as they were determined they were the fitbits they had asked for, obviously they got the Elsa doll and the Fitbits but I like to draw it out to make it more memorable and we quite often have a “remember the year...” conversation around this time!

So how would these traditions go down in your house and in what ways do you think you might do things slightly different to the rest?

I always feel sorry for Santa (Father Christmas in our house) getting miserable glasses of cold milk on a bleak-midwinter night. He's magic, so no question of booze-related accidents - it's not as if he's going to collide with other sleighs, anyway.

Always a tot of something to warm him up here.

When I was a child it was little things in stockings only from Santa, everything else was from family and people had to be thanked. My folks were usually pretty skint so it stopped us asking for anything too big/expensive/impossible. It was still incredibly exciting, though. Stockings always went on the end of the bed - admittedly a bit of a PITA when you have to creep in to retrieve, fill, and replace without anyone stirring.

We did the same with our two, and dd now does the same with hers.

@BiddyPop that's lovely to have that time of reflection.

I found it hard to adapt when I married DH as his family are very low key about Christmas, and aren't British so have very different traditions. 11 years and 4 DC later they've become a bit more jolly thankfully!

We've stopped buying for our siblings and we just buy for each others children. All far happier as we all confessed that we were putting stuff on amazon wishlists just for the sake of it.

I'm doing stockings for DS and DH for the first time this year. We do a Christmas eve box but disappointingly for the haters, it has 2 secondhand Christmas books and a pair of secondhand Christmas pj's that get passed down the DGC

DH and I love a Christmas walk wearing santa hats and greeting everyone we see.

@GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER I agree, it was always a measure of good whiskey or sherry left for Santa when I was growing up and now he’s left a glass of red wine but o think I might bring back the whiskey/sherry thing as something so nostalgic about it...

Here’s a question for everyone do you find you have taken and carried on your DH/partners childhood traditions as much as your own? I definitely haven’t but in my defence I have a much better imagination than him and his Christmas’s growing up didn’t sound at all magical of special. My MIL really hates the way I do some things (stockings down stairs) not letting find kids getting stuck in in a unwrapping rampage...

I heard if said up end there thread but a calm Christmas is just such a good way to describe it, the whole day in candle light, Coventry carol on repeat the smell of the fresh herbs and meat filling the house and our girls being so spoiled with love all the while carrying the traditions of their grandparents and great grandparents before them, it does just feel such a special and magic day...

I love our Christmases, and they very much reflect my own childhood experiences.

Our children get a Christmas Eve box delivered by the elves, and they come down to find it after their bath. They get some new PJ's, hot chocolate, a treat like popcorn, a Christmas book and a new Christmas film. I reuse the same Christmas mugs every year too.

They hang their stockings on their door handles, and then I put them at the end of their beds when I know they're asleep. They come in to us in the morning, and stockings are opened on our bed. I do my husband one too, and my parents are with us this year, so I'm doing one each for them.

I then go downstairs, turn on the tree lights, and get my camera on to record them coming downstairs. Father Christmas always leaves them a handwritten note, along with the crumbs of whatever treat he was left the night before. We start openening presents whilst my husband makes croissants and coffee.

It's entirely my old traditions, as my husband's family didn't have any. His was a very subdued upbringing, and he left home at 16 and only ever spent a few Christmases at home due to his job, so there's nothing to carry over from his side. It took him a while to get involved really, but he enjoys it now. He's finally found his Christmas Spirit!

We have a small gift each at the table, homemade crackers, and then a single gift on the tree for the evening. I do all the shopping and organising, so I don't usually get the extras like the stocking, table and tree items, unless my Mum is here as she always thinks of me!

We have stockings but the presents that go in them are not necessarily the low value presents, it’s just whatever fits. (Did the same growing up too). Each child has a stocking and overfill presents next to the stocking all from Father Christmas / Mum & Dad. So physically larger presents obviously don’t go in the stocking and little ones do but there is no distinction between silly stocking fillers and high value presents (in fact, I think small tat bought for the sake of being a stocking filler I think is very wasteful).

@BillHadersNewWife I mean that when dc buy gifts for their sibling and parents they pay 10% of the costs.
They are old enough now to want to get each other something nice but don't really have their own money to do so.
They got in the habit of asking each other for expensive items, the 10% idea means that they are learning about budgeting for gifts while still not being too constrained by 11 year old finances.
When they were little they used to buy tiny things like chocolate bars for everyone.

@Cookit

Our stockings aren’t necessarily low value either and definitely go after quality rather than quality. My folks always went for sustainable items in our stockings when growing up and it was always the kind of things I could imagine an Elf making at the North Pole so I try to keep this going as much as possible. Organic bath bombs, wooden bird whistles, riding socks, a purse, hair nets, riding gloves, a book that they might have seen throughout the year...

We open our presents one at a time to see what everyone else gets and always have presents in the afternoon.
I think my parents started this so we would be eager to do all the washing up after Christmas dinner while dad has a snooze 😂 Had stockings on our beds in the morning.

Stockings don't go on the beds here either. My parents always put them on the end of our beds but when we moved into this house my eldest (then only) daughter got the room with the creaky laminate floor. It was a Christmas disaster waiting to happen! So we decided then it might be best to pop it outside the door. I put one of those plastic command hooks up and she hangs it on the outside of her door for Santa to fill. then when my second daughter came along that was just tradition!

Presents here are split into 4 categories. Christmas Eve box, santa sack, regular gifts and stockings. It sounds complicated but I actually do it this way to make it easier for me to organise on a spreadsheet in the lead up! Let me break it down...

The Christmas Eve Box is something we never had when we were kids however my mum would always let me have one gift from under the tree on Christmas Eve. So I see this as just our take on that. We have an Elf that visits around December 12th, usually just after our Christmas tree has gone up. He leaves a note asking if he can stay and celebrate Christmas with us until Santa needs him back at the North Pole. The kids have named him and look forward to him coming each year. On the 24th he will have disappeared with a note thanking the girls for taking such good care of him and he leaves a small box for them each. The boxes contain new PJs and bath robes, some sweets, a dvd, a story book or sticker book and hot chocolate. Basically a Christmas Eve care package!

Stockings mainly contain the bits and bobs I pick up that don't really fit anywhere else. So my eldest might get some bits of jewellery from Claires and the youngest might get a new TY beanie boo. I also try and get a few bits that look like they could have been made by elves. :)

Santa Sack gifts are from the man himself. We get the girls to write a letter to him early December. They are told they can ask for three things but we always strongly suggest that one of those things should be "a surprise". They are also told this is a suggestion only and not to ask for anything electrical or something that won't fit in the house (rule added when the eldest thought to ask him for one of those ride on unicorns). We try to get them what they ask for and a few other little bits too. Santa has his own wrapping paper so if they ask for something that doesn't quite fit in the sack it's obvious it still came from Santa.

Regular gifts are from us or whomever sent them. We like them to see we all buy for each other and take time thinking about what other people would like. We also encourage the girls to buy for each other (via the bank of mum and dad currently as they are still little). We feel this teaches them to think about each other and be thankful to one another. They're shockingly good at picking for each other too.

Stockings are opened on our bed, the Christmas Eve boxes sit under the tree the morning before then big gifts are opened after (a rushed) breakfast. We take gifts in turn rather than a frenzy. I do this because my parents did it that way. I remember me and my brothers once begging to just open it all at once and see what it was like. Mum gave in and afterwards we all sat and said how we much preferred taking it slow and seeing what everybody got! We never did it that way again.

Other traditions involve making a ginger bread house kit with Daddy the weekend before Christmas. We also have a "North Pole" party in the lead up where we invite all the kids in the family to come over and do crafts, have fake snowball fights and finish with a Christmas buffet that consists of everything from pigs in blankets to candy canes.

Basically, I bloody love Christmas.

We do box from the elves on christmas eve - new pjs, christmas themed marshmallows, cookies and choc etc. (all stuff they would have anyway on xmas eve just in a parcel)

Stocking are hung at the end of the bed (stockings are just tiny things like chocolates, funky pen, socks, novelty items like slime etc)

Then Santa leaves bigger presents in the middle of the lounge (normally one main present and then a couple of smaller things)

We then have breakfast and get dressed and then do under the tree presents that are from us and family - i normally give a medium sized present and then a parcel of books and maybe a couple of other things

When the kids were little - 3-6 ish we took them to the poundshop and they all choses something for each other and for me and DH. then 6-10 ish we gave them £5 per person they had to buy a present for and took them somewhere like home bargains, now they are young teens we give them £10 per person they buy for and take them shopping/let thme order things online.
Part of the magic of christmas is thinking about what people will like and finding them the perfect present. that takes practise so hopefully by the time they are adults they will ok at giving and not just receiving.

Re children buying presents, we've always done something "from the children" since they were babies and it was a photo of them in a frame. They got involved with handprints etc and it's evolved into them making something for GPs etc every year. I don't think the GPs are that fussed tbh but it's important for the children. They also buy something for each other and for us now, either something small (Eg blu tack - it was a craze!) or we will match their savings if they want to give something bigger.

OP with your DD, I wouldn't expect her to initiate buying you stuff from cold if she's not been responsible for it before. Maybe your DH could plant the idea in her head before her shopping trip next time. She could well be really enthusiastic and generous but just needs a bit of help initiating the idea and following through. I bet she will love getting you something and feel really proud of herself.

We are also a downstairs stocking family. Father Christmas brings stockings, a book people box set and one other thing such as a game. I try to make DC the odd gift as well as buying them stuff. I've painted them pen pots, made them fudge, and I think I'll do bath bombs for them this year.

@MistressMind thanks, I’m going to make more of an effort with her and her sisters next year with giving as well as receiving.