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Christmas

From present ideas to party food, find all your Christmas inspiration here.

Original poster

I might have cut present buying down to the extreme lower levels???

36 replies

hidinginthenightgarden · 10/11/2019 08:41

I hate tat. DH hates tat and a sister expressed to me a few months ago that she is "over getting bought stuff".
In light of this I have suggested to DH that we don't buy for each other and for siblings we have an afternoon together doing something nice as we rarely get together. All ideas gratefully received!
On top of this I don't buy for friends so I only have my kids, parents and grandparents to buy for.
Extreme? Have I gone to far? DH parents (and both grandparents) give us money not gifts so we will only get presents from my parents.
I don't think I will regret it but am having doubts!

OP posts:
Wildorchidz · 10/11/2019 08:43

We buy for our dc, godchildren and each other. Haven’t bought for siblings for years. It’s fine.

DelurkingAJ · 10/11/2019 08:43

As an alternative you could add a secret Santa for siblings? We do this with DH’s siblings and everyone gets a really decent present rather than a handful of duty presents!

GreenTulips · 10/11/2019 08:44

I think it’s a great idea

We do stockings - some fav chocolates socks maybe a new mug etc which is nice to open and we can find fun things

Sibling why not do a family panto or a grown up comedy club night?

Elbeagle · 10/11/2019 08:45

I don’t have siblings and DH has one who lives abroad and doesn’t do Christmas so that is completely normal for us!

PermanentTemporary · 10/11/2019 08:45

We do this, started when we were broke but its been so nice we've stuck with it. Makes christmas minimal cost, maximum fun.

If its physically ok for everyone, how about meeting for a special walk followed by dinner or tea? I had my birthday on the Malvern hills, it was fab.

Mintypea5 · 10/11/2019 08:47

We buy for our children / nieces and nephews and each other.

DH family we did secret Santa for the adults (there is a lot of them) and my family is just my mum and brother now so we get them a gift each.

wildhairdontcare · 10/11/2019 08:53

How about a stocking for you and DH to set the morning apart from any other. No need for tat, DH and I do a stocking for each other, it usually includes a bottle of aftershave/perfume, a bottle of alcohol, luxury sweets/chocolate, a treat candle and a mandatory satsuma!

Satsuma is eaten there and then and everything else is used up quickly/would have been purchased regardless.

Justapatchofgrass · 10/11/2019 08:57

We do similar. My DH and I don't buy for each other- we have joint money and can get anything we want anyway. Our uni age children- cash plus token stocking (order from they amazon which list or what they ask for). We buy a token stocking for whoever is at our house on Christmas morning (no Tat) - so my usually parents. Then I have 6 DN under 18- who mostly get cash. His DP get sent a crate of wine.

Very easy, no older DN, no siblings, no friends. Minimal family

Oh and the dog- he gets the most gifts, balls and toys.

MY DP give everyone cash. How DP send a small cheque for the whole family which we give to the children. My DC no longer get gifts from our siblings as they are over 18- agreed family cut off point.

My DC don't get us anything but a very token gift. As I pay for them to be at uni I would rather they didn't waste my money!

So 8 lots of cash
1 crate of wine
4 token stockings
The dog.

StormyLovesOdd · 10/11/2019 08:57

We do similar, only buy for children and our parents, total number of gifts is 7. It's so much easier and saves us a fortune.

We make Christmas special by having a lovely meal out somewhere over the Christmas period instead of having lots of tat to open

Justapatchofgrass · 10/11/2019 08:58

everything else is used up quickly/would have been purchased regardless

Then why not just but it when you need it? I don't get this gifting for gifting sake.

Lovemusic33 · 10/11/2019 09:05

Last year we decided not to buy for siblings of niece and nephew, instead we all went out for a meal together, hopefully we will do the same this year as it’s much better than buying/receiving tat.

Pukeworthy · 10/11/2019 09:06

I only buy for my DD really...

Original poster
hidinginthenightgarden · 10/11/2019 09:07

Thanks all.
As siblings we are going to do a theatre trip or something similar with dinner.
I could do a stocking for DH but judging by what we got eachother last year, it would just be full of sweets, chocolate or booze and we already have plenty of that!

OP posts:
Exp1etiveDeLighted · 10/11/2019 09:13

We more or less do this but its tricky as there is one sibling who is long term single and childless and buys for all the nieces and nephews - they wouldn't get any presents apart from one from their Dad if we all stopped buying for adults. Similarly there is another married but childless sibling who buys for all the children but then would get nothing in return. So we still buy for them but not the others with children.

MrsElijahMikaelson1 · 10/11/2019 09:14

We buy for DC and all adults go in a secret Santa with a £20 limit.

allthegoodusernameshavegone · 10/11/2019 09:15

You will never look back, giving your time is a far better gift

Noroof · 10/11/2019 09:15

Yeah...I buy for my dad. DH and I buy token small things so that the dc have something to give us. I have to buy gifts for my childcare. Otherwise its just for the dc. I have a sister and we just promise to do a spa day. My friends and I don't bother... we'd rather have a meal out at some point.
I love not feeling stressed and spending a fortune on stuff people don't want.

blibblibs · 10/11/2019 09:19

We're pretty minimal too, 5 neices and nephews, which is now down to 4 as one now lives with a partner.
Me, DH and DM have a stocking each on Xmas morning but it's not got anything expensive in it, £15 each at most. And then 2 DC.
We don't buy for friends or any of DH family as they don't bother. I don't do DSis apart from sending the yearly school photo, same as she did when her DC were school age and the only reason DM gets a stocking is because she spends the holiday with us.
It's great not having to think of what to buy for people and all that extra expense and hassle.

danmthatonestakentryanotheer · 10/11/2019 09:19

I buy for my DD DD'sP, OH and Parents (mine) and that's it. Buying for siblings, nieces, nephews and their children would bring the total to 23 people to buy for otherwise.

TheSquashyHatOfMrGnosspelius · 10/11/2019 09:20

This would be my ideal Christmas to be honest. It would take the stress right out! If I only received food or drink it would be great but I end up with stuff and I am trying to de-stuff not get more!

Original poster
hidinginthenightgarden · 10/11/2019 09:28

This would be my ideal Christmas to be honest. It would take the stress right out! If I only received food or drink it would be great but I end up with stuff and I am trying to de-stuff not get more!
Last year I got a random photo frame and a candle melt. I have never used candles - ever and I don't display many photos either.
I also got some random bits like slippers that don't fit, eye mask - never used etc. I just don't want it!

OP posts:
Spam88 · 10/11/2019 09:29

We don't buy for siblings. We all had kids around a similar time so stopped buying then - that's 6 less people to buy for, hurrah! Oh I do actually buy for my sister but she's much younger than me and I still consider her to be a child 😂

I would love to stop exchanging presents with parents and a few aunts/uncles as well but I'm meeting a lot of resistance with that one! I'd be happy to keep buying for them but really would like them to stop buying for us - they spend far too much and it's just not necessary. But apparently we're their babies, so they're having none of it 🤷‍♀️

TheSquashyHatOfMrGnosspelius · 10/11/2019 09:36

How good would it be for the planet if we all stopped buying each other tat at Christmas? All the shops would shut but think how lovely it would be. I feel stressed by being given stuff and that is not in the spirit of it all at all. Makes me sad. A jar of pickled walnuts and a can of Guinness would make me beam from ear to ear. I have no interest in pig shaped bookends or another feckin windchime. Food drink but preferably nothing but a hug.

blackteaplease · 10/11/2019 09:53

Me and my siblings do kids only instigated by me the year my brother bought me a naff candelabra that went straight to the charity shop as soon as it was open.

on DH's side we do a not so secret Santa to a max of £25. They are a fan of lists so everyone gets a gift they want. Dh and I do a stocking for each other as well as presents.

We did no adult presents on both sides one year and it was a bit rubbish.

billandbenflowerpotmen1 · 10/11/2019 09:53

This year I'm buying for those who are in need and will appreciate something. So, 4 people. Last year it was 35 including various GC of siblings who I've hardly met, never acknowledge the gifts and have a lot more money than me
I've told everyone what I'm doing and haven't had one negative or snide comment. It feels very liberating, I haven't even started looking for things as will actually buy what people want and need rather than a gift for the gifts sake