Health and happiness and a slightly better year than this one. Since March we’ve had:
-DSD suicide attempt no1: 50 paracetamol (severe MH issues started by utter fucker biological father)
-Pregnancy (‘oh shit! Sterilisation failure , I’m 52, WTAF’.... followed by ‘oh wow! This is wonderful!!!)
-Three months later, miscarriage (night before Mother’s Day, really, really nasty, but then, is there a nice one?)
-Nervous breakdown by me caused by above plus intolerable work stress). Three months off, half pay for two of them.
- in the middle of this, DSD suicide attempt no.2 (104 paracetamol, saved by an hour, week in hospital, permanent liver damage, almost sectioned)
-funding private therapy on a single income because 5 months later she’s still on the waiting list for long term care..
- DD moving up with us permanently to go to local uni (pretty wonderful , actually)
-DD revealing emotional abuse by mother and older DS (not so wonderful...)
- bankruptcy caused by inability to pay unbelievably huge legal bills incurred taking Mrs Xorn’s utter fucker ex to court over contact (A tale for another day..)
- a soft ‘put ’ from Mrs Xorn’s direction followed by continuing mental issues (I wonder why....?)
But.... in between too many wonderful things to list, life ain’t bad really...
For example,
DS and DSD are such supportive sisters, they pull each other along and look out for each other in a wonderful way,
DSD is in her first relationship with a lovely young man, a kindred spirit with the same issues. Watching her flower gladdens the heart. I think she’s smiled more in the last month than in the last two years.
DD becoming the talented artist she always was, but didn’t allow to emerge. She is carving out a wonderful niche.
The fact that we began to grow a little human pice by pice, even if it didn’t stick, we were parents for a little while.
Mrs Xorn passing her taekwondo 3rd dan after two years hard work.
Mrs Xorn opening her first TK club
Amongst others.
But, please Mr Universe, next year, could the good outweigh the bad?