Depression over xmas

[Cherryrainbow]

Hey guys not the usual kind of post theme, and hope it's ok to post on here. Any tips or advice for getting through holidays when you get depressive phases?

Xmas is my favourite time of the year, i think part of why I like it is I get a few months of distraction by looking up ideas, shopping etc.

But cos of the nature of stuff one moment I'm all excited and up for every thing then the next I'm dreading it and thinking I can't be bothered with this, and feel no joy/wanting to do things or feeling like it's gunna be rubbish anyway, would rather stay in bed and cry and/or watch movies.

Having kids means I do force myself to do fun stuff and xmas stuff to help them enjoy the holidays and just general every day functioning as well.

Anyone else feeling like this or know people who do, and understand? X

I understand you. I haven't suffered from depression but I used to look after my Auntie (she sadly passed away 4yrs ago) who was bi polar. My aunt never married or had children and I was closer to her than my mum. She loved Christmas, a lot of it was because of church, though I am an atheist. Some Christmases she would participate, which I loved seeing her animated and enjoying life. Some Christmases she would take to her bed for weeks and I would wait for that part to be over and for her to kind of come back to life, having missed a lovely time of year. From being little to a grown up I understood it and never resented her or nagged her to snap out of it. I think you should be proud of yourself for being able to function for your children during down times. Try not to beat yourself up about your down times, they don't last forever and better times follow. x

Actually started to hate it a little because each year I feel I'm no further along than the last. Even worse because my parents want me to go home to visit and its like 'hey you escaped this shitty town but you're back and - still a loser' (not them just my own feelings :/) I'm always friggin single too xD Brigit Jones eat your heart out haha.

Its a shame because I actually like Christmas. But I'm really starting to resent it these days.

I wouldn't be depressed about it if it weren't for circumstance though. It sounds like maybe its a touch of s.a.d you might be dealing with? Winter weather can bring it on and stressful 'milestone' times certainly don't help.

I get it OP. I start early so that I can get as many of the “have to’s” out of the way. It helps me hugely to know that no matter what happens to me Christmas can happen for the dc because it’s already organized. I pack away my decorations in a particular order so that I can grab the essentials easily.

In December I concentrate on cosy, self-care hygge. I do activities with the dc but mostly christmas versions of what they’d do anyway. Instead of watching a movie, it’s a Christmas movie under blankets. Instead of baking scones we make gingerbread. I get advent calendars which require no extra effort from me after buying them. I burn Christmas candles instead of the usual scented one. It looks like a full on month of Christmas activities but it actually doesn’t require much input from me at all.

Anything that I can make ahead and freeze, I will. I also have simplified a lot over the years. I love reading about poster’s poncetastic food plans but I really can’t depend on being capable of peeling hundreds of potatoes so Auntie Bessie’s are in the freezer. We entertain quite a bit over Christmas, and I plan and prep well in advance so that it’s as easy and stress free as it can be.

I wear Christmas jumpers because they are minimal effort but people assume you’re enjoying the season if you’re wearing one.

I’ve never actually been properly depressed for Christmas (touch wood) but taking particular care of myself and putting a good face on for the dc are factors in that, though obviously that’s only ever a part of it.

I like Christmas, or at least the idea of Christmas but if I could run away by myself for a few days and it would all be over when I got back, and nobody would have missed me, then I would do it in a heartbeat too.

Thanks guys, for sharing your thoughts and experiences. There's some great ideas I'll try and follow up, I've read a bit about hygge when I've looked up self care ideas like meditation, different types of self care etc. It seems to fit in with the cosy autumn and winter months. Sometimes it can be easy to think I must be the only person who feels this way etc. It's good to share these feelings and hopefully help others feeling the same time.

From my own experience I've been on and off medication for depression since I was 16, im 32 now. Recently been diagnosed with fibromyalgia too so it makes a lot of sense for where some of the lack of energy/ wanting to sleep/ feeling low side of things, from chronic pain. Don't know about yourselves but I think part of why I haven't really responded much to my diagnosis is because I've had to crack on on with things over the years anyway I've been kind of like oh ok that's the name for it, now to carry on doing what I've been doing...

Hopefully the xmas cheer will be contagious, if I don't force it to happen maybe it just will. Nothing wrong with going all I'll do tonight is watch movies and drink hot choc then other days feeling up to adventures x