How do you make Christmas special for children who no longer believe?

[LyraBelaqua]

This year is the first year that my children aged 7 & 9 do not believe in Santa. I’m feeling rather sad about it and want to bring in some new traditions to accompany the old ones to make sure Christmas continues to feel magical for them. Could you give me some suggestions please as to what we can do? We will still do Santa sacks, cookies and milk and a carrot for the reindeer etc, I’m just looking for new things too. Thanks very much.

How about a tradition of going to see a pantomime/ play before Xmas, see the lights switch on etc so it's still exciting in the run up. I'd still do hot chocolates, films etc Xmas eve which is still enjoyable and not need to believe in Santa for that. I still think Christmas Day, with games, seeing the family, all the food etc is still fab. This will be our last year before our first little one arrives so I have all the magical years to come, but for years Christmas for us has been all adults and it's still my absolute favourite tome of the year and I still find it magical.

They get to be Santa now! Are there any younger kids in the family who they could pick a stocking filler for? Or something for a toy appeal?
We walk round the lights locally on Christmas Eve and post thank you/ Christmas cards for our favourite each.
Make decorations for the house.
Maybe give a budget each to do you/ dh/ each other a Stocking?

We always used to go to the panto on Christmas Eve- followed by a "picky tea" (lots of things to pick at-all our favourite munchies) while watching a film or whatever. We still did "father Christmas " and stockings- but we all pretended, they knew, we knew, we all knew but we all played the game.
Christmas morning nice breakfast (varies) presents, dog walk and picnic (hot soup, mince pies, mulled wine) then Christmas dinner.
The menus change- sometimes traditional, sometimes not but everyone gets a say. Grandparents joined us, or we wrote them.
Some tv, silly games.

Do what works for you- Christmas is special, do things you all like and give everyone a say.

Thanks for your suggestions. I will definitely do these. We’ve only been to the panto once so I think we could do that instead of the usual visit to Santa. And a really nice idea to do stockings for each other or get them to chose an item in each other’s stockings or something.

It is the first Christmas you know that they no longer believe. I bet they knew long before now, most kids do and many keep up the pretence. Christmas can still be magical.

There are so many things to do at Christmas that don't need you to believe in Santa-it will always be magical for them as long as they get presents!!
Get them involved in prep like making cake/pudding/mince pies, decorations for the house, presents for aunts, grandparents-it's a great time of year for baking and crafting.
We always have a trip to London to do an activity/show and see the lights up West, usually the weekend before Xmas.

Well I have a feeling you are right LoreleiRock I don’t think the 7 year old has fully believed for ages, as he told 9 year old about the tooth fairy yesterday which lead to the Santa question. She definitely did believe, it was awful she was devastated but is quite philosophical today thankfully.

Yes you are right ChiaraRimini I’m sure we will be able to keep it magical. It might even be better because it has always been stressful trying to get them to sleep, sneak in with presents etc. I’ve always found it quite tense.

My lovely Mum got me to help buy and wrap the presents for everyone. Included choosing the wrapping paper, tags etc and writing a special message on each gift. That way I got to learn the pleasure in giving a thoughtful gift rather than just focusing on what I get.

I really miss those times now.

That’s a lovely idea MrsGrindah I’m definitely going to encourage that.

Probably going to point out the bleeding obvious here, but how about talking to them about the real meaning of Christmas?

Absolutely, Ellzebellze! I was coming on to say the same thing.
Why not take the DC to Sunday School and let them have all the fun of acting in a nativity play, while learning about the birth of Jesus and the whole bloody point of Christmas?!

I still carried on our little traditions for my younger brother for years after he stopped believing, because it was tradition! We still left treats for Santa and the reindeer, still left our stockings out etc. They might still be up for it!

Are there any "winter wonderland" type things near where u live? Down here they set up a funfair with a skating rink, Santa, rides etc something like that may be fun.

It might be a good time to think about the real "giving" side of Christmas. Could your family sponsor another family who do not have the resources right now to exchange gifts/have a special meal? Where I live there are a number of charities that will register families in need that are eligible for sponsorship. You receive information about ages etc. and ideas for gifts. Your children could help pick and wrap them.

We have done this and the children were enthusiastic and learned about the spirit of giving.

We have also made Christmas goodies to parcel up and give to the older and less mobile members of our community. I remember being beyond excited doing that when I was little.

One other tradition we developed is that each family member became a sort of specialist in making a traditional holiday food. My sister made special cinnamon buns for Christmas morning every year, for example.

Good point ellzebellze. Why didn’t I think of that?

Yes we do go to church over Christmas, always have, always will. The religious side of things are not what I’m particularly concerned with at the moment. They still believe in that. Well, daughter doesn’t actually but that’s a whole different story .

Thanks everyone for your suggestions, I really appreciate them.

There are so many things you can do around Christmastime, pantomimes, Christmas markets, concerts, parties, watching films, making amazing meals.. not to mention they still get presents. Literally the only thing that changes is where the presents come from (in their mind).

I still wrote a letter to Santa until I was 20 hahaha (didn't believe before anyone asks - just a family joke) but Christmas can be magical for people of all ages whether they believe or not. If nothing else, the time spent with family is special :).

Mine are 16 & 18 and they still believe!
Believe in the spirit of xmas! We had a few yrs when they were too old for santa, but then they came to me and said it didn’t feel the same without all the rubbish!!
So we still put notes up the chimney ( gas fire flue) stockings , pjs bedding etc.....
But, we now include, Acts of random kindness, charity donations, the jingle sock, look on Pinterest, make mince pies and sausage rolls and buy and put up a fresh xmas tree each yr.
Christmas for your family should be just that, whatever works for your family!

Cancel it !

Joke BTW

Oh op I get it ds2 said he didn't believe last year but I kind of ignored him. This year he definitely doesn't.
I still keep little traditions that make it xmas. Putting the tree up. New pjs on xmas eve etc. Might get eye rolls from the teens but its traditional and they go along with it.

DD now 12 thinks of herself on the adult team and wants to keep the magic going.

Every year she has to think of someone that she can be a secret Santa for. Last year she picked an elderly neighbour who lives on his own and made him a wee hamper and a pair of slippers. She wrapped it and left it with a note saying it was from Santa. She was so chuffed to see him in his slippers and he was so happy to get a surprise.

@petiteonion Bloody hell thats made me cry! There’s some lovely threads on here today.