Did anyone ever really overdo it when DC were small?

[areyounow]

My 2.5 year old DD has been so good since her younger brother (3mo) has been born, I was so pleasantly shocked but I'm worried I'm going to be massively overdoing it for her Christmas. I've already bought her 12- yes, 12 presents. I'm returning some of them, some of them I can't but did anyone else really overdo it when they had smaller DC, if so what happened?

I forgot to mention, DM has bought a MASSIVE present already for DD and a few toys as well!

Yes, I think a lot of parents overdo it. We certainly did and in all honesty I wish we hadn't. My DC are 8&9 now and they are used to a huge pile each but it's difficult when things they like get more expensive.
Each year there piles look more modest and I feel like we haven't bought 'enough'.
It's extra pressure I've piled on myself unnecessarily.

Absolutely - particularly last year aged 3. I’d squirrelled things away and didn’t really realise how much there was until I brought it all out Christmas Eve and my husband was horrified. Really going to try and scale back this year before I set an expectation!

I did last year, new baby and Christmas at in laws where I couldn't do Christmas the way I wanted. So I made up for it with stuff. I dont think anything happened as such just some stuff has not been played with / was a waste. I am determined not to start shopping early this year as that always means I buy too much. My kids are older but still young enough to change their tastes.

Yes we did and we have always gone overboard at Christmas. I try and avoid tat and we don’t do stockings and I’ve stopped getting helium balloons so we are making changes.

No

Under 3 they didn’t get gifts from us, big family 4 aunts, 2 sets of grandparent and 1 great grandmother plus friends all brought gifts.

We paid for clothes and shoes and days out

My mother gave money and we used that for days out, now we use it for the Christmas panto.

Now they get one large present, a stocking and a few smaller things they asked for, usually T-shirt’s or socks phone case etc

Up to age 3 we stuck to a small number of gifts and then the pile gradually increased but so far I don't think we've had a year where we went ott. Though of course everyone's opinion on what's too much/just right is different!

You say your DD is 2.5 so I'd think the obvious solution would be to put some of your purchases away for her birthday. I really do think a big pile can be overwhelming when they're so young and instead of the happy, excited child you pictured as you bought and wrapped everything, you end up with a fractious and overwrought dc on Xmas day!

Plus IMO dc get better play value out of their toys when there aren't too many of them. I've noticed that some friends dc and my nephew, all of whom had/have stacks of toys within easy reach, seemed to struggle to settle to playing with one thing for more than a few minutes.

Yeah I really overdid it on my DDs first Christmas. My MIL was even worse than me and DD ended up with a ridiculous amount of presents. I look back at the photos of her literally surrounded by stuff and think WTF. I’m still not sure what my thought process was. I have scaled waaaaaaayyy back since.

Facebook doesn't help. I can't stand the photos people post of the massive pile of presents ready for their darling. It's showing off at its most grotesque.

If we've bought too many they get put back in the present box for next Christmas/birthday. Some have spent a while in the box!!

I did, but the vast majority was bought in the summer at car boots so didn't spend a lot but absolutely loads of toys

Yes, I insisted on piles of stuff because that's what I had.

Then I realised that I didn't actually appreciate or remember most of it because it's what I expected.

I buy 1 wanted item, 1 surprise and a few little token gifts now. Probably about 5-6 each and not necessarily toys.

Dd is 31 this year and I'm still doing it

Last year I managed to spend around £700 on presents for an almost 4 year old and a six month old. In my defence, I'd just lost my dad plus I had horrendous mental health issues after the birth of dc1 and desperately wanted to make up for that even though I'm not sure he'd noticed.

Dc1 was happy with the contents of his stocking, the christmas tree and the fact that his remaining Grandparents were all there. Dc2 just wanted cuddles and milk.

This year, they are getting less, much less.

God yes, I was only thinking about this the other day. When my ds was 6, I split up with his dad, I went completely OTT that Xmas. We went to my mum's for Xmas day and I think she was shocked at what I had bought. I was thinking about it as I have no idea how I afforded it, I must have really hammered my credit card! It didn't happen again...

If she's 2.5 then her birthday must be in Feb or so? Could you save some of the presents for birthday ones rather than take them back?

It's hard because you just want everything but they do get overwhelmed if there is too much. DS2's just had his first birthday and we haven't finished opening his presents (and he only had 5) because he spent ages wanting to look and play with each one, I like that.

Yes, once when our oldest was about 2.5. It wasn't fun for him, just overwhelming and opening presents became a chore. And of course he doesn't remember it.

Since then they get a toy they've asked for from Santa, and small stocking with chocolate/small toys/bath stuff/socks, a present they've asked for from us and some books and clothes. They also get a present from both sets of grandparents, and a couple of aunts and uncles.
That's plenty to be honest!

We have a massive family and DS birthday is in January. It overdoes itself!

Wow won’t she have grown out of stuff your bought her now by the time Christmas comes along? They change so quickly at this age!

I don’t overdo it (4 yo and 1 yo) but feel bad and measly for that, so you can’t win.

We overdid it massively for DD's first Xmas, all the grandparents went nuts as well.
This year we've asked everyone to stick to one or two presents maximum and if they would like to give money for her bank account, lovely, but NO MORE PRESENTS! 😂 last year was obscene and she was only 6 months old. Me and DP will stick to a couple of presents each as well and that's it

Yes we did and we do

But each child is told a set amount is sent to Father Christmas for them. And he gets what he can from their lists with that money

It has tended to stop the ott present asking (although this years surf boards was met with a complete wtf from me!)

We went Ott for my first’s second Christmas. A lot of the things were things she needed and really I should have spaced it out over the year rather then saving them for Christmas as she was overwhelmed.

In my opinion it depends what the 12 presents are. Are they all toys or do they include books, mazes, play dough, paint etc? Do they get presents from others? Do they get things all year round or mainly just birthdays& xmas?

first couple of years it was family that went ott. then they agreed to money towards a season ticket - we've had zoo and now soft play. appreciated all year long and saves the house from another mountain of plastic.

No. I think it's pointless tbh. Don't get me wrong - I love Christmas, love the decorations, the carols, the food etc. But tiny children do not need gazillions of presents to enjoy Christmas. I've never spend more than about £100 on each child including stocking bits, and mine are 11 and 14 now. When they were little it was much much less than that.

She probably won't remember, but money and waste wise plus setting a prescedent don't do it! I like the something they want, something they'll wear, something theyll read and something they'll use (ie craft stuff) a good balance.