How old are the DC? Are they in school yet?
And what things don’t you like - the presents, the big meal, the expectations, the “we’re all going to be jolly no matter what, and so should everyone else”, the music and ceremonial aspect?
Is there anything that you do like about it?
Are there family locally that you feel must be involved and don’t want to be in order that you feel you can’t stay at home yourself?
Renting a cottage is expensive for Christmas. Whether CP or elsewhere.
And do your DC have any expectations about the holidays?
Can you think about what you do and don’t like, try to unpick it enough to put together a list of things that you would like to do and see, a nice meal that you and the DCs would enjoy, and treat it as a midwinter hibernation?
Lots of things I do are not Christmassy, like trip to the cinema or walk on the beach or through the woods (we try and see what the animals are doing for winter, can we see any tracks, and pick up pine cones to use as firelighters now that we don’t use them for crafts).
There are lots of the “Christmas standards” played in shops non stop, but there is a lot of beautiful Christmas music which is very different, across all genres. And there is also lots of lovely music that invokes winter without Christmas.
Decide to ignore the bits you don’t like- don’t go shopping in the mania, try to get stocked up on food ahead of time or get to stores at quiet times or do online shopping.
Find ways to acknowledge your grief at the time - we have the youngest light a Christmas candle on Christmas Eve, an Irish tradition to show that there is “room in our inn” for weary travelers even if there was none in Bethlehem. But we always follow that with a quiet family reflection on the good and bad things about the year just ending, and talking about those no longer with us, finishing with a short prayer. It’s a quiet time just us as a family, no tv or radio, just gentle lamplight and firelight.
And just because “everybody” does something, doesn’t mean that they all actually do - lots don’t go to work parties, family’s have different amounts they spend on presents and different ways of doing presents (only for DCs, for everyone, small tokens or large piles), eat different meals etc and at different times - so decide what suits YOU and YOUR DCs for yourself.