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Christmas

From present ideas to party food, find all your Christmas inspiration here.

Help me to help ds13 buy for dh please!

12 replies

Howmanysleepstilchristmas · 01/12/2018 09:54

Posted in chat by accident so reposting here:

Ds is 13 and tends not to give much thought to presents for other people, to the extent it doesn’t occur to him to think about them at all. His siblings all plan what they’d like to get one another and their dad, I give them a budget (and the money) and we go together to buy what theyve chosen. Ds never has any idea, so I pick a shop/ department and take him to look. He tends to grab the first thing he sees, so often I redirect by suggesting eg something Spider-Man related/ craft related/ a certain clothing type/ style and he chooses from available options if that makes sense. Without the guidance the present wouldn’t match the recipient! I’m stuck for what to suggest for dh. Budget is around £20-£30 and it needs to be something we can find several versions of for him to choose between, preferably in the same shop as ds would grab the first item in the first shop otherwise rather than looking for one dh would like. I’m trying to encourage a bit of thoughtfulness in his gift giving.
Dh likes luxury type items, the outdoors (walking, camping), has his own business and tends to buy himself anything he particularly wants so isn’t easy to buy for anyway!

OP posts:
ja9r · 01/12/2018 11:14

Can you enroll any of the older siblings in helping him think through the gift?

Or as a group suggest lots of ideas and you find some online that match those ideas them encourage him to buy one of them?

Howmanysleepstilchristmas · 01/12/2018 13:20

He is the eldest! He’s 13, the others are 11,5 and 6 just more thoughtful!

OP posts:
BrokenWing · 01/12/2018 14:29

I never bought my parents presents until I was an adult with my own money and thinking back anything I bought was received with much enthusiasm regardless of what it was (even when it was an electric can opener in the 80s - sorry mum!!).

If the idea is you give your dc money and they choose their own gift for their dad then just let them choose, even if it isn't quite right yet. It is all part of the learning process which personally I think he is too young for yet. It shouldn't be what you would choose or the whole thing is pointless and he'll never put the thought effort in because you will "redirect him" anyway.

Howmanysleepstilchristmas · 01/12/2018 16:08

Hmm, I agree with that when it comes to my presents, but dh is likely to notice a lack of thought and interpret it as not caring. Ds has suggested sweets ds likes but dh hates, a PS4 game (dh doesn’t play on/ own a PS4. Ds does.) etc. I want to let him choose, but to choose for dh rather than himself iyswim

OP posts:
Howmanysleepstilchristmas · 01/12/2018 16:10

I’m surprised people think 13 is too young to choose gifts. The other 3 are really good at it.

OP posts:
Elenorrigbywoes · 01/12/2018 16:29

Expensive socks - the happy socks or Pringle. TK Maxx do a range of brands and do nice gift sets at this time of year. He would have a range to choose from.

BrokenWing · 01/12/2018 16:31

dh is likely to notice a lack of thought and interpret it as not caring

well dh needs to grow up and realise its a present from a child who hasn't quite learned how to choose correctly yet. some people are just better choosing presents than others and even adults aren't good at picking presents sometimes.

Howmanysleepstilchristmas · 01/12/2018 17:24

@Brokenwing Maybe. But meanwhile I’d like to help ds buy a present that he can enjoy choosing and giving and dh can enjoy receiving, hence the post asking for suggestions!

OP posts:
Ricekrispie22 · 01/12/2018 17:53

My Dc are giving my DH:
A Chillys water bottle
iPad case
Washbag

For previous birthdays and Christmasses, they've given a mug that they've hand painted at a ceramics cafe, thermal gloves, portable speakers, BBQ tools, fancy chocolates....

TheFairyCaravan · 01/12/2018 18:02

Waterproof socks or waterproof gloves.

Howmanysleepstilchristmas · 02/12/2018 16:28

Hopeful bump?

OP posts:
NaturalBlondeYeahRight · 02/12/2018 16:32

Is there a film they have good memories of watching? My dd has just got her dad a repro poster of planet of the apes as they both really like the new films.

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