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Original poster

I'm worried Dd will be disappointed

29 replies

Badwifey · 21/11/2018 22:07

My 4yr old dd is so very excited for Christmas this year. It's the first year she's actually fully aware of what's going on.
About a month or two ago I started gathering a few bits for her, books and Lego.... things I know she will enjoy. She hasn't really said up to recently what she actually wanted apart from the Lego. She has mentioned things she's seen on tv but she is pointing out literally EVERYTHING! She has repeatedly talked about a playmobile set that's a pool for seals. I'm not sure she's actually really into it but more the fact it'll have to be filled with water. She has told my brother she's getting the Masha and the bear house and told me she would love the enchantimals play house!! I have already ordered the dolls for the enchantimals and was going to pick up the house soon until she mentioned the Masha house. I've tried talk her out of the playmobile set today and she got a little upset about it.

I don't know what to do! I'm worried she'll be very upset Christmas day if I don't get it for her. I can't afford, nor want to buy her the 3 sets but I feel she'll be disappointed no matter what I do.

Has anyone ever had a disappointed child on Christmas day or do they generally just be too excited to even notice on the day.
Should I bite the bullet and get the playmobile set (even though she'll wreck the place with it?!!)

OP posts:
TBDO · 21/11/2018 22:10

I would stick to your budget, don’t buy her extra. Explain that Santa only has room for one or two things so she’ll get one/two of this things that he has heard her two about (or are on her list).

On another note - why would water make a mess? My DD has similar playmobile set, we just stick a few towels under it when she’s playing.

ThisIsGospel · 21/11/2018 22:10

"Oh! DD Father Christmas has to get presents for all the children in the world so we must make sure there is enough to go around. We can't have all the toys as there won t be any left for the other little boys and girls. Shall we write a letter to him with a few things and one of the big sets? You can post it yourself!"

muchprefersummer · 21/11/2018 22:22

We've always got our DS to write to Father Christmas with his wanted list. He's only allowed to ask for 5 things and they can't all be big and expensive. It's helped to find what his actual priorities are. We tend to still buy a few additional gifts, chocs, stocking fillers etc. He's never been disappointed when he's not got something - they're far too hyped up!!

Knitwit101 · 21/11/2018 22:27

Sometimes they are so overwhelmed with all they see that they can't actually decide what it is they want.
Ds wants about 105 different things. He's getting maybe 6 things and he'll be so excited about those he will forget about all the rest. Your dd will be exactly the same. Pick her what you think she will play with the most.

Pebblesandfriends · 21/11/2018 22:30

Stick to your budget and manage her expectations. Mine also ask for everything. I tell them they may get one or two things off their Christmas list. They know it's just to give father Christmas ideas. Don't set a precedent byou can't keep up with!

Original poster
Badwifey · 21/11/2018 22:31

TBDO she's an awful spiller!

Thisisgospel that's the track I took today when she got a bit upset wondering why she would be the one not to get one.

Because it's her first year knowing what's going on I don't want her upset Christmas morning.

I suppose I could always keep something up for her birthday and get her the playset and get myself some wet floors Wink

OP posts:
MiniMum97 · 21/11/2018 22:48

Tell her that no-one gets everything they want for Christmas. It's ok to have a big list of things you want but you won't get everything on the list. Whatever you do get will be a lovely surprise. You need to set her expectations and that will avoid disappointment on Christmas Day. Having said that if she appears to want the water set more than anything else I would take back something and get her that.

Hideandgo · 21/11/2018 22:51

It’s very important for you to teach her to appreciate what she does get (which sounds like a lot) and that Santa can’t get her everything she wants.

Asj0405 · 21/11/2018 22:52

She's still at the age where you can set expectations for the future. If you get her everything on her list she may come to expect that every year and when she's a teenager and wants all the expensive things that may not be achievable.

Let her know this year that either she can only ask Father Christmas for X amount of things as he can only fit so many on his sleigh

...or that her list is only a guide for Father Christmas and she will get a couple of things from her list and then a few surprises.

I do the latter with mine so I can make sure they get a few things that I know will actually be played with rather than all the latest plastic tat they've seen on tv that I know will last 2 minutes before it ends up in the bin or collecting dust.

It also adds to the excitement of oooh I wonder which I'll receive rather than i already know I'm getting because it was all on my list.

Everyone has a different approach just do what works for you Smile

TBDO · 21/11/2018 23:57

If she’s got her heart set on the water one, get a cheap shower curtain, lay down 2 towels and let her play!

Jemimafuckinpuddleduck · 22/11/2018 07:19

I have 3 DD’s and take it from me, 4 is the perfect age to set the bar!

We have always gone OTT with the girls and are now kicking ourselves as as much as I would love to rein it in as they now get a lot more spent on them during the year with various clubs, animals and hobbies etc I genuinely can’t bring myself to in fear of little disappointed faces that their Santa piles are much smaller than previous years!

I have read some posts threads where people have given their kids different sized presents/piles through the years due to changing circumstances and I wish I would be more like that and spend what is there rather than for the sake of it and breaking our backs trying to carry the financial load but I just can’t!!

Beetlebum1981 · 22/11/2018 07:23

My DD is 3 and is asking for everything she sees on tv for 'my birthday'. I keep pointing out that her birthday isn't for a long time and that Christmas is first. I tell her every time that she can't have everything she sees or wants - I think you just need to repeat every time she tells you so that it slowly starts to sink in.

LooksBetterWithAFilter · 22/11/2018 07:26

My brother is 10 years older than me and remembers being worried one year that I’d be disappointed when I got up because I wanted everything. He said I opened my stocking and was so excited by everything in it then he said let’s go and wake up mum and dad and go see what Santa left you. I looked at him and said you mean there’s more?
From my own experience of 3 dc is that they ask for everything but are so excited by what they get on Christmas Day that they don’t notice the things they didn’t get.
We have also always gone for the list from them is a wish list not a shopping list and they get some of what is on it as well as some others things I’ve chosen myself like you have with the Lego and books.

Equimum · 22/11/2018 07:28

Maybe sit her down and get her to think of what she really wants for Christmas, and write a letter to Father Christmas together. Perhaps say she needs to think of the one thing she would really love, and then she can let Santa know other things she would like if it’s possible/ he can’t get what she wants. This is what we do with our boys. We give them a day or two to make sure they are certain, then ‘post’ the letters.

cheesymashandbeans · 22/11/2018 07:31

She will love whatever she gets at that age... it's all just so exciting! Will soon forget all the things she's pointed at on adverts!

But FYI... the enchantimals house is on offer for £35 this week in Smyths toy shop ! Just got it for my niece!

Rachelover40 · 22/11/2018 07:33

She won't be upset badwifey, she'll be terribly excited! You won't be the only buying for her either, other relatives and friends wlll give surprises.
If she goes on about Playmobil - and they do want everything they see at that age - just tell her all her presents are sorted already and maybe next time. That's the truth, no Santa nonsense.

You'll have a great time, new toys, games, staying up late, fun.

Breadfoam · 22/11/2018 07:41

My dd is nearly 3 and also asks for lots of things she sees on adverts / YouTube.
However she has had several constant asks that she also ‘wrote’ on her santa list - shopkins, hatchimals, barbie farm set, Elsa dress. She has those but she definitely doesn’t have everything she’s asked for - however I doubt she will remember everything she’s asked for.
She would absolutely for sure notice if she didn’t have one of the above, whether she’d be upset I doubt. She would probably mention it, even if not on Christmas Day, she would say afterwards ‘oh I didn’t get x’ but I think she would be happy with only one or two things off her ‘list’ in all honesty.

That said, if your daughter is fixated on the playmobil I’d be tempted to get it especially if I could find it cheaper on eBay or something.

EvaHarknessRose · 22/11/2018 07:51

Also, get her excited about making and giving gifts and cards to others and about christmas traditions - this will give her a better experience.

Original poster
Badwifey · 22/11/2018 08:29

Thanks everyone for the advice. I have been trying to gently remind her that she won't get everything. I think she has become fixated on the playmobile set and so I'll get that for her. I have already ordered some enchantimals dolls so I might ask someone else to buy her the house.

Thanks everyone. I might start getting her to make some cards to go with the presents we've bought for her cousins.

OP posts:
CantSleepClownsWillEatMe · 22/11/2018 08:29

When writing to Santa started with ours we encouraged them to ask for one or two specific items (taking the opportunity to encourage them in a certain direction if necessary Smile), a "surprise" and books. They get more than that but it makes them focus on what they'd really like and doesn't sell them the idea that Christmas is just a huge grab fest.

If they ever made noises about something we absolutely didn't want them to have for whatever reason (expense, age suitability, overpriced land fill and so on) we did a mix of:

Santa has millions of children to give gifts to/might have something even better in mind for you/might decide you're too young for that/checks with mums and dads about the rules on things like that.

She's still young enough to manage her expectations and you've got 4 weeks. I bet she'll be delighted with whatever she gets but I'd strongly suggest (to any parent of a small child) limiting their exposure to tv ads, toy catalogues, YouTube and so on. They're an advertisers dream at this age!

Weenurse · 22/11/2018 08:38

We did small present from Santa as he has soo many children to give presents to. Mum and Dad provide the big presents.

apostropheuse · 22/11/2018 08:52

I told my children they could ask Santa for a few things, but that he might not be able to bring them all because he had to bring presents to all the children all over the world and that if there was something he couldn't bring this year he would choose them something even better! He may even bring the present they didn't get the following year. This saved the hassle of travelling the length and breadth of the country to find that year's elusive toy! Wink Santa also brought lots of surprises.

As others have said, your DD will be delighted with what you get her.

Angelinthenight · 22/11/2018 11:24

When she see's all the gifts xmas morning she will forget what she has asked for and if she does then say she can get it for her next birthday.when my kids do their santa letter i let them know that santa may not bring all they want and then say the birthdy thing.kids do forget ,dont worry im sure she wont be disappointed on the day x

Lazybonita · 22/11/2018 12:49

Hiya, I noticed that the playmobil set is 20% off in Argos. My boys had the penguin version but were only allowed to play with it on the bathroom tiled floor or sat on a big towel. They did really enjoy it.

DownAndUnder · 22/11/2018 12:53

I doubt she’ll be disappointed, they’re too excited with what they have on the day and she has some bits she wanted. My son was 4 last Christmas and was adamant Father Christmas was bringing him a flying hoverboard, he was fine when it didn’t materialise Grin

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