Possibly last year of FC and me not working-how to make it extra magical

[PerverseConverse]

My eldest dd is 11 and still firmly believes in Father Christmas. I suspect that now she's at high school it might be the last Christmas she believes. She has younger siblings who are 10 and 3. I'm not working at the moment but once my ds starts school (possibly before) I'll be back to work and therefore won't have as much time next Christmas to do things.

I'd really like to make this year as magical as possible for them all. Ds will understand far more this year about Christmas as last year he wasn't excited in the run up as he was too young.

I'm a single parent on a limited budget so can't do any shows or trips away except maybe day trips. No family and I don't drive so reliant on public transport.

I'm planning on doing baking, local walks to see everyone's lights, Christmas movie afternoon in pjs with popcorn and sweets, bike ride if the weather is ok, Christmas craft things like making snowflakes.

What else could I do to make it magical for them all?

In the unlikely event that your 11 year old daughter, who is at high school, still actually believes Santa is real I would gently tell her the truth and enlist her help to create fun things with your younger children.

The ideas you have sound lovely.

apostropheuse she truly does. She was assessed recently for asd (told no way she has asd) and I mentioned this in the assessment. She told the practitioner that she had seen him one Christmas Eve and that he is most definitely real. There's no swaying her on it and I wouldn't want to anyway. I said more magical for them, not less.

My grandson has autism, but in his case he's very analytical and was doubting by seven. I know not all children who have autism are the same though.

I would worry about her being teased at high school, but maybe she doesn't tell the other children she still believes.

Anyway, I hope you have a nice Christmas.

Honestly? I think that any idea that this is going to be the 'last good Christmas' is a really good way to ruin it - nothing ever benefits from too much pressure and anticipation. By all means do all the stuff you describe - all of which sounds great - and anything else you fancy, but do it because it will be fun now, not because you need to cram all the fun in before a grim working future!

That's not what I meant at all but the reality is that once I'm working I won't have as much time to do things with them over the Christmas holidays especially as for the DDs their time is shared between me and their father. I have 5 days with them all over the holidays and want to make the most of it.

I have a DS with asd who can’t cope with upheaval and too many outings and crowds so we do a lot of gentle, calm Christmas activities. It’s not how I imagined celebrating Christmas but I actually love our build up.

Every afternoon we do something between lunch and homework. They don’t have to join in (that’s important) or see it through to the bitter end.
We bake stained glass biscuits for gifts. Sorting the sweets into colours and bashing them with the hammer is great fun.
We make easy sweets like chocolate dipped marshmallows, jazzles, candy cane lollipops.
We make beeswax candles from a kit, decorate jam jars.
We make and fill our own Christmas crackers.

When we decorate the tree each ds has their box of ornaments to put on. Sometimes DH sets up a camera to do a time lapse of them decorating.

We go walking in the woods to collect pine cones to add to the decorations, make salt dough and orange pomanders with cloves. We have festive music and a scented candle to add to the mood.

We cut out snowflakes for the back windows and make Santa’s washing line out of paper and strings of paper gingerbread men. The fridge gets a make over and becomes a penguin or a snow man.

At least once we pull all the sofa cushions off and make an igloo in the living room.

I like to have a Christmas jigsaw on the coffee table that we all work on from time to time.

I have a few mismatched Christmas dishes that come out for December and on Christmas morning we do a North Pole breakfast with paper decorations on the glasses and holly designs painted on my white plates in food colouring. The dc help with this (it’s not done by elves: I’d never have the energy). They make fondant snowmen for the Christmas cake too at some stage (it’s basically play dough for grown ups!) The dinner table has lots of little heirlooms and symbols so we talk about those when we set it, and remember relatives who’ve passed on.

It sounds like lots but in reality it’s ten and twenty minutes here and there, and all cheap or free. But lots of fun and we have lovely memories.

I’m hoping that some of these activities will evolve and grow with them as they get older, so that the magic doesn’t die off with Santa.

Hoping that there’s a couple of ideas in there that would work for you.

i used too ( and still do but a bit embaressed by this) write a letter from the elves to my dc about mid dec, outlining things they may like to consider in the lead up to christmas..it was lighthearted and full of praise for good behaviour so far..so went along the lines of

' babybean.. we have noticed you have been very good at keeping your bedroom tidy but lately your bed has not been made every day..lets see if you can do it for the next week or so as mrs christmas makes all us elves make our beds ..'

i often referenced things they had done during the year to make it seem real.

i also made dds ( and they still do now) write letters to santa, and not just a list it had to be a proper letter, asking after the reindeers well being and how training was going etc. i have kept them all they are so funny...then we had a day when we walked to post box and posted them ( substitute ones) , if dc are very little a picture drawn for santa will do.

then i used to use a cow pat ( we lived in the country) and freeze it and spray it with fake snow and glitter and left it on the trampoline with snow sleigh tracks...that was the year santa did a hair raising landing and rudolph did a poo ! it was hit with young dc who love all poo related things...

Just a minute - you put a cow pat in your freezer? above and beyond!

When we stayed over at PIL's and DC were younger, MIL used to get up first (around the time the DCs were stirring, don't know how she got the timing right) and used to jingle sleigh bells at the bottom of the stairs, as if FC had just finished his deliveries and was heading back to the North Pole.

DCs used to think that was magical .

Alana that’s an amazing list of things you do! What’s the Santa’s washing line?

Alana I love the fridge makeover idea, that's inspired . Redjellybean the cow pat is brilliant though you have to be pretty dedicated to go that far!

Our free to do stuff isn't as exiting or unusual as some:

We usually make the tree decorating a bit of an occasion. Christmas cd on, take turns hanging ornaments, then pjs, pizza (or treat food of choice) hot chocolate while we watch a Christmas film.

In the days before putting the tree up an afternoon of making decorations.

Make stained glass cookies and chocolate bark.

Pinterest is great for craft ideas that might inspire you.

PerverseConverse it’s just a string “washing line” with paper cutouts of Santa’s hat, coat, socks, underwear, gloves pegged on.

this is a posh version but ours is a bit - ahem- more basic!

Now 15 odd years post the cowpat dds still talk about it.. It if family legend.. And my dgodd and dgrandneices love hearing about it too.. Poor rudolph.. He is clearly delicate of constitution.
Might resurrect it this year as have several under 10's coming for Christmas and frankly all the adults find it hilari too.

I believed at 11 and so does my 11 year old.
People believe what they want to believe. I was gutted being 'told' and would rather have had my own imagination, I wouldn't have embarrassed myself at school or anything.

To be honest there's part of me that still believes in Father Christmas. DD1 swears she saw him fly over the house in his sleigh so there's not much that will dissuade her from that and I think it's lovely. Dd who's 9 nearly 10 is still a believer and ds is only 3 so just getting his head around Father Christmas. I don't remember stopping believing at any point. More a gradual thing.

mine will be 16, 13 and 11.
They don't actually believe, but they love to engage in the magic. Quite happy to have santa secretly fill their stocking and leave lots of presents!

We still do lots of bits and bobs, and they are quite happy to join in and be christmassy, you don't need to be a firm believer to keep wanting Christmas magic