What do you actually do on Christmas day?

[Roccocconut]

Need some ideas to try and avoid another crappy Christmas.

It’s me and OH, no kids, no family within 5000 miles. No friends in the local area, acquaintances further afield all have families so no other singles/couples to meet up with.

I hate being stuck in the house at the best of times. We’ll phone family in the morning, and take the dog on a long walk in the country, but have no other ideas. A day filled with TV or books isn’t inspiring, we can do that anytime. Neither of us are big into cooking - I hate it with a passion and DH isn’t fussed, so it’ll be a regular meal rather than a big spread. Volunteering is out - I’m a regular volunteer as it is but my role isn’t needed on Christmas day.

How do I stop it becoming another disappointing Christmas day? I’d rather just have a normal day being out and about but the world doesn’t agree!

Some good ideas, thanks! The poster who said it sounds quite lonely is right, life here is kind of lonely as it is and it feels worse at Christmas when you know people are socialising and having fun with friends and family. I’d love to be back in the UK with family, sadly it can’t happen.

I wouldn’t mind doing a decent hike if the weather allows. Last year we went up to the mountains for the day, which was nice apart from the 8-hour traffic jam we endured. We had booked Christmas dinner in a restaurant, but missed it, so Christmas dinner ended up being chocolate, coffee and a packet of crisps from a petrol station. Can’t go away because of DH’s work commitments.

I can’t volunteer in a different role as I don’t have the necessary training for the roles available on the day. I did look at volunteering somewhere else but they are full and have a waiting list.

I do like the jigsaw idea - I’m not usually into puzzles so it would be fun to do that as it’s a little different. Cinema is a good shout too, I think there’s at least one nearby that’s open. Pub is out as there isn’t one within reasonable walking distance, and there’s no taxis round here.

Anyway, thanks!

I'm in the same boat. We don't have much money either so grand holidays are out.

This year we are going for two nights down south in the Cotswolds. Just a cheap air bnb. We are taking our bikes and will just eat our favourite foods which for us is pizza (!). It's not a traditional Christmas, no. But it's a nice break.

I’m not usually into puzzles so it would be fun to do that as it’s a little different.

I think, actually, you have hit the nail on the head here. The key to making the day special is to do something you wouldn't normally do, even if it isn't something which in itself is wildly exciting.

I think the first thing I would do is not just have a usual day to day meal. Can you have some food brought in? Something you both love but don’t often have, or something completely out of the ordinary. If there is the equivalent to M&S ready-to-cook available there then do that? It all comes ready in trays to just pop into the oven.

We have a tradition of Buck’s Fizz for breakfast, with German grain bread and smoked salmon. Sometimes a croissant as well. We do this every year, so it feels a little bit special every time.

Alternatively are there any foods or things from home that you miss that you could order in advance? Even simple basic things might make it feel a bit more special.

Where you live sounds really isolating for you, sorry I sympathise. I moved abroad, but my husbands family is here so we have that.

I think I would try to do something completely different as it sounds like "doing Christmas" isn't going to work well for your circumstances.

I think just doing the dog walk, and cosy home day and trying to just treat it like a lazy Sunday would be my approach. There will be other Christmasses where you can back to the UK and celebrate with family, in the mean time don't stress about trying to make a Christmas as you would want it to be.

We always do adult stockings and a nice breakfast, so that happened even before kids.

You can do nice pampering things at home, or do a project together to make the day productive.

I do feel for you, it is often such a hard time of year for people who don't have that "family Christmas". But, if you try to ignore all of that... you can still have a lovely, quiet day at home x

OK, so you know the mountains will have a traffic jam, but would you LIKE to go there and have a good long walk?

And if so, make it special for yourselves.

Bring a flask with good coffee or hot chocolate.
Or even bring a small gas or biofuel stove, and boil a kettle there for it. That might be done at your parking place before or after the walk rather than lugging it along with you.

Bring along a nice picnic with a few things that would make it special FOR YOU. If you have the stove, you could cook up something basic (bacon for a buttie? Soup? Marshmallows on a stick for smores with your hot choc?).

And have supplies with you in case that jam is bad on the way there/back.

Are there any cinemas open, or other places, that you could go?

What really jumps out at me is that you sound unsettled anyway, and Christmas is making it worse. Are there ways to get involved in the community around the festive season? Carol services or musical performances to go to, and chat to people at. Community pot luck dinners. Office parties. Etc.

Or a time to investigate groups locally like walking groups, evening or weekend classes that might interest you and allow you to meet others (relevant to work, or a hobby, strengthen existing skills, or just something you have had an interest in but never taken time to pursue). Or join a local choir or drama group or Toastmasters or ...whatever is local - many of those will have something social as well as their regular meetings over Christmas.

Could you offer to host a gathering of work colleagues around the holidays, maybe just a wine and cheese thing rather than a full-on dinner, but allowing you to get to know others on a more social level (and perhaps their partners) than just the office necessity.

Fill a stocking of little surprises for one another and open stockings in bed with coffee and a little treat. Get up late and have Bucks Fizz and your favourite breakfast then go for a walk. Come back, open presents then either make it to prebooked restaurant meal or have a casserole cooking slowly to be ready when you get home.
Have a new film, luxurious chocs and some drinks of your choice then a romantic early night.

Genuinely interested to know where there is an 8 hour traffic jam to the mountains on Christmas Day? Is it a ski resort?

Possibly somewhere like the mountains in the USA or Canada, where you’d get lots of people moving around and used to getting out into the mountains on any day off they get in winter (and possibly summer).

I know I'm missing the point here but does anyone else find it a bit sad that even cinemas and/or bowling alleys feel the need to be open on Christmas Day? Poor staff.

Present opening in bed
Sex
Cooked breakfast
Fiddle with/try on presents
Nice walk
Dinner
Christmas films cuddled up on the sofa

That's how we usually spend ours and it's fab!

Eat.

What country are you in @Roccocconut ? It might help us work out a few ideas.

I’m in the USA.

8 hour traffic jam was because of a crash, that was exceptional but 2-3 hour traffic jams are quite common as it’s an area popular with tourists and the roads aren’t good.

There’s been some good ideas on this thread. I think the person who said make it different from the norm has got the right idea. I can’t face trying to host a party or anything, but I might see if DH fancies getting together with some of his colleagues and their partners for a meal between Christmas and New Year.

Maybe the US is very different from the UK, but is there anywhere like hostels/shelters for homeless people that put on Xmas dinners where you could volunteer?

It’s just DH and me this year - we will-
Open stockings
Breakfast pastries and Buck’s Fizz
Walk to Church
Watch the brave do the sea swim!
Walk home
Make the Christmas table beautiful with candles, flowers, crackers, table presents
Eat a leisurely lunch
Walk on the beach
Open presents, eat cake, drink tea/wine
Play a game/watch a film/watch TV (whichever appeals most)
I’m really looking forward to it!

Depending where you live in the USA there is usually a lot more cinemas, theatres, places to visit open than there would be in the UK. And most Churches will know about volunteering opportunities.

In your boat I'd have a relaxed morning followed by a lovely meal out somewhere, since neither of you like cooking. Then go for a nice country walk to work off lunch, and then once my stomach had emptied sit in front of the sofa which lots of lovely Christmas nibbles and watch some good films.

I stay with my parents so the food is in the majority cooked for me so I stay in bed until around 9am, then get up have a cup of coffee and a bacon sandwich. Laze around a bit and open presents. Then go for a long walk with dog and get back around 2pm and crack open some sort of alcohol and have dinner around 3pm. Then laze and drink a bit some more and watch tv/netflix and maybe call DP.
Boxing day is better as we go round and visit relatives so not as boring

I am lucky enough to have the day off so will go runnng with friends.

Book a meàl and eat out.

Not sure if you are in the U.K. but I would book a 3 day break somewhere scenic, maybe Scotland

What else do you enjoy?

I would make a favourite meal and also a lovely picnic for a lunch. Perhaps part cook the meal incase of delays.

Jigsaw/games etc before dinner. After dinner lovely PJs & a favourite movie or box set