Nobody wants to come to us for Christmas dinner, how to make it special with just us?

[lostlalaloopsy]

So nobody is keen to join us for Christmas dinner. BIL has plans to invite girlfriend and her family for dinner - obviously MIL can never turn him down. And on my side - sister has been a toxic cow to me all year, she has made me cry a couple times. So I'm not inviting her, but there's a chance she would end up on her own so my mum will go to her I would imagine.

So it will be me, DH and 3 dc's who dance from 4-10. What can I do to make it seem more special? Not just like a Sunday!! Thanks

I don't think with three kids that age it can be anything but special, can it? They are so totally full of Christmas spirit that everything you do is amazing.

Have the tree up, play games, watch a Christmas movie, go for a walk, eat nice food all day...what else is there to do???

How lovely. You can do exactly what you want. For many people, you’re living the dream- enjoy it!

I know a family who did this one year. They said it was lovely. They made sure to play games in the afternoon to make it different from a Sunday and no TV or tech.

When I was grown up we had one year when I was about 17 that was just our family of 6 instead of the usual crowd (around 18 for dinner then the ones who call later) it was so nice and relaxed to just have to suit us. We had s much more relaxed morning,ate s bit later,had dessert hours after dinner,in the living room. We did miss the noise etc but was s nice one off change. Think this year there’s 14 for dinner!

You say you imagine your dm will go to your sisters, try asking her what she is doing.

As another poster suggested make the day special by playing games and turn off all tech.

Ask the dc’s to organise a show for you to watch

That's us every year OP - DH and me, and three kids a similar age to yours. It's a wonderful day! It's nothing like a normal Sunday, what with stockings, crackers, the tree, Christmas music, everyone pitching in with the food, chocolates, we all wear something nice, it's lovely.

Ask the dc’s to organise a show for you to watch

Yes! Children love putting on a show for anyone who will watch. It will get their creative juices following, be a good way for them to burn energy, be something to look forward to in the run up and excitement on the day! Plus they’ll love having your undivided attention and lavish applause!

I miss being a kid.

Flowing, not following 🙈

It sounds ideal and won't be anything like a regular Sunday! Music, games, presents, excitement, nobody but your absolutely favourite people, fantastic food, cuddling up for a snooze after dinner...

I don't agree with the no TV as suggested above. Xmas TV is an essential part of the festive period.

jo Isn't that just normal for a large number of people these days? Certainly most people I know don't have scads of relatives round.

Open one present every hour and either play with it or find a Christmas related activity. Say, one Carol each time.

Can you visit your MIL anyway? Just for a couple of hours?

It’s just myself and daughter every year (apart from the odd pity invite we can’t get out of) and it’s always great, we decorate the dinner table, play games, relax, stay in PJs all day.

Thank you everyone for replies, and putting things into perspective for me. I was just feeling a bit sorry for myself and unappreciated as I always make a huge effort for Christmas guests. But the idea is growing on me now, my dc would love the show idea!! And I am really loving the staying in pyjamas all day idea!!

Matching Christmas pyjamas all day

Put the kids in charge of making/serving or presenting part of the meal each, and get them to create place settings and table decorations.

Myself, my daughter and the dog have matching Christmas PJs daughter and dog refuse to wear them, can’t think why?

If you want to spend the day with others how about inviting friends for Christmas?

This is every xmas for us and I love it! The kids just play with their new toys, and relax watching xmas films.
Get them stuff you can enjoy together like board games, things you can build together etc.

Last year I didn’t do anything much for Christmas. Put your children in charge of setting up the table or have them socialise with each other too. Ask them politely to assist you with table decorations. Or you could always get them to entertain you. Another option is to have them help cook dinner. Traditionally families went to church on Christmas Eve. Christmas movies are lots of fun too.

Put your children in charge!

Would they like a massive Christmas breakfast instead of a roast lunch? Would they like pudding for breakfast and pyjamas all day? Should you all go out to see something or for a wintry walk or take hot chocolate to the beach/woods etc? Get their ideas - my DC would love to ‘be in charge’!

We used to do the having everyone over and it was always fun but very very stressful at times. Last year we decided we were going to have a Christmas to our selves Me, DH and 3DD all exactly same age range as yours.

...it was BLISS, so chilled . I had time to play with the kids as I wasn't running around doing all the hosting stuff. I allowed myself to have a cup of tea and enjoy the present unwrapping instead of dashing back and forth to kitchen trying to get things on for diner. I wasn't falling over people every time I tried to move or toys because i'd had the time to get them all organised and majority taken upstairs. We went for a walk after diner to get some fresh air and then came back and played board games, it was a very relaxing day.

We enjoyed it so much we're doing it again this year. Next year we'll probably invite everyone again and then maybe alternate one year on our own and one year with every one after that but certainly enjoyed having the break.

We always do it on our own with just the one DC, it's enjoyable instead of the ordeal that it would be with PILs involved.
We order extravagant pre-prepared food to just bung in the oven so we can relax and play games together. We usually go for a walk but nothing strenuous.
Maybe some music but no tv or gadgets, phones put away, a proper break. Highly recommended!

I think it will be lovely & magical with all of you. Perhaps each think of a game/activity to do in the day.

This is us this year, we are abroad and it will be awesome.

I’m even ordering in the food pre made and everything! I’m so so looking forward to it 😊

We have Christmas day just the 4 of us every year, My Dss are now 18 and 17. One year we had my Mum and one year we went out but other than that every christmas has been just us four or prior to that, just the two of us (one year on my own as DH was working). Neither of us has any parents anymore and our siblings are usually doing stuff with their partners parents. It's fine. Just set the table nicely, proper napkins, candles etc. have crackers at the table and have some games after.