How to scale down presents?

[SnicketorGinnel]

It feels like time to begin to scale down the gifts that we buy for DNiece and DNephew now that they have left home and have their own flats and both have Partners. In the past I've probably spent £50 on each of them - a combination of vouchers and smaller gifts. We spend similar on SIL and BIL so £200 for the family. We're not that close and don't see them more than once a year (sometimes not even that).

I don't want to be seen as mean and I know that family is important but we're trying to spend less on Christmas this year. Does anyone have any ideas for nice gifts for young adults? I had thought about putting together a bit of a hamper for the family but think it would be very obviously 'different'.

How about £30 each on the kids and a hamper for the adults ?

Do hampers for each household?

Easier still, look at the beautiful hampers at Fortmum & Mason - send a Christmas Breakfast hamper or a Welcome Home hamper both around a £100.00 for the whole family to enjoy at Christmas. Just send a note saying to the neice and nephew that from now on you will be sending a joint family gift to their parents house for them all to enjoy when they meet up. Remember to send them Christmas cards though.

Send champagne. It looks generous and you can spend £25 instead of £50 whilst remaining fabulous.

A nice bottle of wine.

Wow I’ll be your niece 😂 I would send a thank you card and phone to say thanks !! I would be happy with a cheap bottle of wine let alone £50!!
When we were little gifts were till 16 years of age. After that only birthday presents for 18, 21 birthday etc! Gets to expensive

A gift card for a cinema or something. Something they can do together?

If they’ve left home, I’d be sending token gifts only, if anything. The gift to the household that some other posters have mentioned is a nice idea, although hampers are surprisingly expensive for not all that much and we don’t know what your budget is.

And I wouldn’t worry about your gift giving being different this year, unless there’s a strong element of reciprocity in your family gift giving and you’re therefore concerned about imbalance. In which case, have a conversation with them about scaling down, sooner rather than later.

Our family stopped gift giving between adults years ago, much to everyone's relief - we only send cards.

Perhaps you and your family would be happy to do the same.

I don’t buy much once they are adults. I would end a food or drink gift each or a small family hamper.

I wouldn’t do a gift to the household when some of them don’t live there anymore.
I think personas champagne idea is a good one, because no one thinks: ‘champagne how tight’ (do they ) but it could half your budget.

My aunts and uncles all send my siblings and I a gift at Christmas - we are grown up and have our own families so there is really no need. I would understand (without the need of a note/explanation) if they just stopped.

They usually send something cozy or something edible which is always well received and well used, if you really want to send something a nice set of pyjamas or some treat food/drink would lower the expense alot!

In our family we stop buying for nieces and nephews when they turn 18 which has always worked well.

Im sure they would understand you cutting back it has to happen at some point and you have been spending alot on them over the years. As for gifts id say gift sets are nice to get or as joint gifts wine and chocolates. Your not being mean and i dont think that they would think that. With my SIL we discuss it with each other so we give kinda the same x

One side of my family stop at 18 (there are shit loads of us so it had to stop somewhere 😂). I just have one auntie and uncle on the other side and they normally just get a token gift for DH and me, a bottle of wine or tin of biscuits generally, and I get them similar. Definitely time to scale it back I think OP!

I decided last year that our Christmas buying was just out of control. We were spending £50 on each adult in DHs family just because there's an expectation of all buying each other loads (and none of us particularly want or need anything so you're just spending hundreds of pounds on crap for the sake of it). So we halved all the adults budgets but I did some proper good bargain hunting so the gifts looked worth a bit more. This year I'm sticking at £25 but am less concerned about making sure there's at least one substantial present in there, so it's a bit of a more gradual approach so doesn't appear too much of a change in any one year. Maybe that kind of approach might work for you? Otherwise champagne or hampers are lovely ideas, just be careful you don't get too carried away with the hampers because they can get pretty expensive.

My aunt sends us a harvester voucher or money. The meal voucher is nice as it's part of our Christmas treat. I would maybe suggest spending less first so they can also do the same.

I have to say as well, these days I'm very happy with food or other consumable gifts that don't just fill my house up with more clutter 😂 my MIL always buys me nice shampoo and conditioner which I'm too cheap to buy for myself and I always look forward to it!

In our family we stop all present giving at 21. After that its weddings/ graduations and maybe big birthdays. Not there yet.
No gift giving to adults ie own siblings. Its all too much. We get together a lot over the holidays and have great family nights but no gifts.