How to ensure others keep it fair

[mummyof2boys30]

So basically MIL seems to favour older Ds. I try to baiscally pick what presents for her to buy them so both get same value. She hasnt asked for suggestions this year and i know has bought things already. How do u go about making sure its equal.

She had DS1 (age8) today and he came home with a magazine, a book, and a poster. Ds2 (age 6) got an argos book. I made eldest put it all away and told him it wasnt fair so she made a crappy excuse that it was last 1 and then give DS2 £1 to settle him

I think you need to have a conversation about it with her before christmas. Hopefully she will agree to be fair. If she doesn't then i wouldn't accept presents for either child, if she says she will be fair but isn't then don't accept any more presents after that. If she gives unfair presents then be open about it in front of her, don't be polite about it.

Open favouritism is bad for both the dc.

What had your children asked for? It sounds on the face of it that Shen treats them very unequally and at 6 your younger one will notice. But if he was asked if he wanted anything and only wanted an Argos catalogue that’s not so bad.
I would be speaking to your older child as well as your partner to speak to his own mum. They both get something bought or neither do. Or money/ iou given for when other child would like something.

Youngest has some learning issues and he doesnt have much of a relationship with her, but think its because how she treats them as he loves my mum and will go to her no bother. I told eldest tonight in front of her that it wasnt fair and she came up with excuses. Going to get hubby to speak to her as he sees it himself. Is wasnt as bad when he was younger but now he is noticing it himself