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Christmas

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Original poster

do you, did you take your dc out to shop for the dad, and did the dad reciprocate?

22 replies

Slartybartfast · 17/12/2017 08:40

my dd, 18, has told me that her friends have only just started buying presents for their mums
whereas mine always got something for me - they all earned money as teens but before they earned money, either my dm or my dh would take them shopping

surprised that my dd's friends have never bought before

OP posts:
Rockandrollwithit · 17/12/2017 08:41

Yes, we both took our two boys (3.5 and 3 months) out separately to buy gifts for Mummy / daddy. Obviously they need a lot of guidance at the moment but the 3.5 year old loved it.

LizzieSiddal · 17/12/2017 08:45

Yes, we've always done that, although I needed to point out to DH, that he needed to do this as they didn't bother with presents in his family Hmm.

DDs are in their twenties now and both are fab present buyers. They are always very thoughtful pressies.

BiglyBadgers · 17/12/2017 08:52

I would be pretty upset if I'd made sure my dh got a present from dd and he hadn't bothered. Rather perpetuates the idea that women are just there to do things for other people.

At our dd's primary school Christmas fair they have a parents presents stall. The kids can go and choose presents for their parents and then the stall holder will wrap it up and pop a label on. It's all rubbish stuff of course, but dd loves the fact that she gets to choose something on her own and it is a surprise for us. It also saves us having to drag her round shops and choose something. I think it might be the best idea ever Grin

Original poster
Slartybartfast · 17/12/2017 08:56

that does sound like the best idea ever Grin Bigly

OP posts:
mumof2sarah · 17/12/2017 08:58

I've always took my kids out to pick something themselves, nothing big or expensive just a little something they've picked themselves. They have to think about what they choose and have a reason for choosing it aswell. The gifts are always thoughtful and are always our favourites ❤️

MsAwesomeDragon · 17/12/2017 08:58

Yes, someone has always helped my girls get presents for me.

To start with my parents helped dd1 buy me something (no contact at all with her father), then I met and moved in with dh and that year I got 2 presents as both my parents and dh took her out shopping to get something. Dh always makes sure dd2 has something to give me, but often just buys it himself then gets her to wrap it rather than letting her choose something. One year dd1 took dd2 out to get me something, which was nice.

drspouse · 17/12/2017 08:58

My DS school has a present room one day before Christmas, too.
As we give the items for the room, there's the danger of getting your own item back!

Wh0KnowsWhereTheTimeG0es · 17/12/2017 08:58

Yes, we've always done it, take them somewhere like Poundland or Tiger and choose small things, also for grandparents and pets. Their primary school did the parents presents stall at the Christmas Fair too.

TheInterruptingSheep · 17/12/2017 09:02

I think I’ll be in the minority here but no, we’ve never done this. We don’t do it for any other occasion either. Until they have their own money I just don’t see the point, but I’ll probably get slated for saying this. Blush

AuntieStella · 17/12/2017 09:03

Yes I would take them, until teen years when they can go buy themselves. I still reminded them for a while (all the time living at home) and would be a soft touch for slipping them a little extra pocket money at present-buying times.

DH did/does do the same. But I'm guessing there was less emphasis on 'getting something the recipient is likely to like'. Though I guess that's a reflection of him just not thinking.

Mbear · 17/12/2017 09:30

We do this, we usually get my mum to take him, but think it's important that gifts go in all directions - not just his. And we usually get him to chooses something for my mum as she does a lot with/for him.
Best one was when ds was about 3, and he very proudly handed over DH's present - a big bottle of ribena cos daddy likes bena 😊

Original poster
Slartybartfast · 17/12/2017 09:32
Smile bena
OP posts:
Aragog · 17/12/2017 09:42

Dd is 15y and uses her allowance to buy a gift for me and dh. Her choice. She does so on birthdays too. Been same situation for past 2-3 years. Before that me or her dad would give her moment to buy gifts and/or take her out to choose, from being small - it was always something she wanted to do.

MysweetAudrina · 17/12/2017 09:50

My 9 year old and 8 year old did extra chores and saved their pocket money to do their Christmas shopping. They saved 100e between them and I took them shopping last week. They bought 5 presents for me, dh and their 3 older siblings ( and a stocking for the dog) I was told to go into boots and they went off to another shop to buy mine.I have no idea what they got me but they appeared very excited by their purchase. They picked out really thoughtful presents for the others and then wrapped them and put them under the tree. They made an agreement in advance that they both had to agree on a particular present as they were clubbing their money together.

NerrSnerr · 17/12/2017 09:50

My parents would take us out to buy the other one (and siblings) a gift until about aged 12, after that we’d use our pocket money and we’d be given a bit extra in December for friends and family and buy something in our local shops (we had a chemist, a newsagents etc). We always found something, smellies or a book usually.

HoundOfTheBasketballs · 17/12/2017 10:09

DS is 9, me and his dad are not together anymore.
I always take DS out to buy his dad a present.
Ex does not reciprocate. This upsets DS, so he gets either my mum or ex's mum to take him into town to buy me something. He says next year, when he is 10, he will be big enough to go into town by himself! Smile
I think it's important that children learn the value and pleasure that can be gained from choosing and giving gifts to others.

goose1964 · 17/12/2017 11:30

We used when the kids were small, now they buy it with their own money

CantSleepClownsWillEatMe · 17/12/2017 11:56

Yes we've always done this and the dc love it. A pp said until they have their own money she didn't see the point but I think that misses the point tbh. It's not that I or DH are particularly anxious to get "stuff" but we do feel it's important they know that there is pleasure in giving as well as receiving and that people generally appreciate a gesture that shows the dc thought about them. They understand that just as they enjoy gifts at Christmas and a bit of a fuss at birthdays, so to do other people.

SatsukiKusakabe · 17/12/2017 12:34

Yes dh has already taken them to get mine and I have yet to get his. It’s always something small but the dcs love choosing and wrapping something and like pp said, it’s to get them into the spirit of giving, and finding there is enjoyment in that.

The “own money” thing is not something to get hung up on - I don’t earn any money at the moment, but when I did and when I do again it is for all of us, as dh’s is now, and they should get to share in the fun of giving presents.

hashtagelfie · 17/12/2017 12:43

No we don't but technically we don't buy presents for the dc or each other either, Santa does all that. We are far too poor to buy all those gifts as well as birthday presents (3 of the dc have their birthdays within 3 weeks of Christmas Day!)

shouldwestayorshouldwego · 17/12/2017 12:54

When they were younger they would go into poundland each clutching their pound (in the days when everything actually did cost a pound) and go around and each choose something for dh. Now the two oldest go off with friends and buy something for each family member with their pocket money. I will take the youngest shopping. Usually dh will take them all to buy presents for me but now it is just ds left. Might send him with one of his sisters.

DeloresJaneUmbridge · 17/12/2017 13:03

My son always goes out with DH to get something for me. I've bought DH a CD which I will wrap with DS and label it from him.

It's what I always thought was normal. My son is autistic and doesn't earn from a Saturday job but we give him an allowance for Xmas and he buys it from that,

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