How to tell if DD still believes in Santa (aged 10-and-a-half)

[RDCMum]

DD asked for an expensive present (£300 laptop) so her dad, granny and I bought that between us. She then did 2 separate lists for Santa for her dad's house and mine (we're divorced) and he's spent a further £350!!!!!

I haven't even SEEN her Santa list for my house and I'm starting to panic, as I've bought almost everything I was going to get her and am worried she's now going to produce a list of more expensive stuff, which I simply cannot afford.

Is she chancing her arm by pretending it costs us nothing, and it's all from Santa?? Help!!

I think she is doing the let's list everything I could possibly want. There is probably a lot of things on it that she wants less than other things.
Who gets everything they asked for even when they believe in Santa ?
Mine wrote a list usually in priority order and the exciting part was to see what they got.
Why write two lists when there's only one Santa ? He would split between the houses.
I think your daughter is trying her luck.

She is 10 1/2.

She doesn't believe, she is having one over on you.

I’m tempted to say she has plenty - how friendly are you with her dad, could you buy some of the Santa list from him? Seems like an awful lot of money. Or Santa only visits one house and the ones at yours are from you?

It’s unlikely that she believes but she might. Even so as pp, you don’t get everything anyway. We always do a stocking and one gift from list so won’t have this problem hopefully.

Surely she already knows Santa doesn't bring everything/expensive things/last minute additions! You must have had those conversations years ago?

Regardless of whether she believes or not she is quite spoilt to think at 10 that Santa can come to two houses and get her hundreds of pounds of gifts in both, or even in just one! That's your problem, not whether she believes or not! She should have been told years ago that Santa is not able to give every expensive thing a child wants.

I would be very surprised if she still believes at 10.5yo.

Does she buy for others? Giving my 11yo a set amount of money and introducing her to budgeting to buy for others within that has done wonders for her appreciation of the effort and expense that goes into presents.

I'd be amazed if she still believes aged 10.5. My 8 & 5 year olds are wavering this year but still erring on the side of caution & believing . She needs to understand that just because she writes a list, she's not going to get everything on it.

It's a Dad problem, not a Santa problem. Surely he's not daft enough to let Santa take the credit for spending such a ridiculous amount of money on top of a laptop?

Santa should only going to deliver a stocking to your house containing random stuff. Explain Santa can't deliver double the amount of big presents for one child, just because their parents no longer live together as that isn't fair to the boys & girls whose parents are still in one house, then wait for her reaction. She's milking it.

Thanks everyone for your helpful comments. I was flabbergasted that her dad had spent that amount (and she may well be too). It occurred to me in the meantime that at least some of the stuff may well be from HIM and not Santa, or certainly not on her list.
I’ve always got her more from me than Santa because I wanted her to grow up knowing that I’d put the effort and money into it instead of some mythical being, and also because of the fact that some kids get more than others and not because Santa cares more about them.
Roll on tonight when I’m going to try and winkle her list out of her - keep your fingers crossed for me!

I think she probably doesn’t beleive. I would ask her to pick one thing she wants from santa, say santa doesn’t do electronic items, he only does toys. Then do a stocking with small things in it. She’s very lucky to be getting a laptop and her dad has spent a fortune on her, she’s getting plenty.

My dd’s Don’t beleive and haven’t since they were 9 or 10 but we still play along with it a little, santa brings one big gift and stockings, anything extra is from me or family, their dad spends £100 on them (usually 4 gifts and a book).

I think spending £350 is crazy unless there was one thing she really wanted that cost that amount (Xbox, laptop etc..), could he not put a few bits back for her birthday?