Advice for wife's Christmas present

[Carleatspeas]

Hi,

Bit cheeky this but I need some sage advice. I'm desperately looking for something for my wife and want to avoid my usual fails. I find it flipping difficult to correlate the value of the things my wife seems to like. £30 on lipstick seems mental to me but normal to her. Same as £200 for shoes. I’m happy to spend money on her, but I struggle to spend large amounts on what seems like tiny bits of tat to me. What always seems to happen is that I water it down and end up buying her several bits of crap.

Anyway, I’ll probably spend about £500 – it’s just where do I put it?
She has kinda mentioned stud earrings, shoes (LK Bennet I think). She is 40, fashionable (much more so than me) and will be grateful for anything. Do I just buy one thing like earrings from Tiffany for the whole amount, or a few things for less. A real first world problem here.

Any help or suggestions would be much appreciated!

Thanks! Carl.

I suggest you get her to make you some lists... one of items at £500, one at £400, £300 and £50 or whatever. Then she gets a surprise (she doesn’t know exactly what she’s getting) but you won’t get it wrong either.

I personally would like a few smaller things, but that reflects the sort of stuff I want at the moment.

Think it's too late for lists. She has no doubt been giving me loads of ideas that I haven't heeded...

Don't buy Tiffany because it's a rip off but a good pair of diamond studs (given she's asked for studs) is never going to be wrong, is it?

Think it's too late for lists. She has no doubt been giving me loads of ideas that I haven't heeded...

Then you’re at risk of spending £500 on something she doesn’t particularly want! You need to start listening .
I’d ask her. At least then you’ll get something she wants.

So where would be good for the diamond studs?

The thing is, your wife can buy herself cheaper lipsticks and shoes but for a special treat from you, she loves the more expensive ones, that she wouldn't usually be able to justify buying.

If I were choosing for you, I would spend about £3-400 on one big item (handbag / Tiffany jewellery if that is what she into) and then the rest on 3 smaller presents, e.g. some nice stud earrings from a local jewellers or Christmas market, so they will hopefully be a bit different, some make up or skincare from her favourite brand and maybe something funny that only you would think of buying her.

I'd say buy a couple of high end but smaller items e.g. an eyeshadow palette from a premium counter / some good leather gloves/a beautiful diary and then blow the rest on something special like the earrings or some boots. Make up counters /space nk are v helpful but don't tell them your full budget! They will happily spend it for you! Ha!

Okay, this is a good idea. Let's say £400 quid on a handbag and the rest on smaller gifts.

Buying a £400 handbag sounds like a minefield. Where do I start?

Buying a £400 handbag sounds like a minefield. Where do I start?

You sound like you’ve only just met her?!

If you have no idea where to start with buying her a handbag-you need to ask her what she wants. Otherwise, you’re in grave danger of blowing £500 on shit she hates!

Either you know her so well, you don’t need to ask OR (like most couples), you give/get lists.

Yes, go to Tiffany if she likes it in fact, they know how to present things that's for sure.

Otherwise somewhere like this hattonbydesign.com.

But Wildrose's idea is good.

I would suggest that you ask if it's one that she could take back and exchange it or put the value towards something else.
Not very romantic but if you got her the wrong Expensive_make handbag, she could take it back and get the one she wants.

You sound very thoughtful Carl.

You would not be able to exchange cosmetics or earrings.

With handbags it's probably easier to say what she wouldn't like. No Michael Korrs or anything blingy. What brands are good at the moment?

If you're sure she's mentioned diamond studs I'd go with that - you can't go wrong, just get them from a local jeweller. Handbag or shoes is very personal and easier to get wrong unless you know exactly what she wants.

In future - bloody listen!

Coach bags are lovely. They also exchange and do great sales just after Christmas so she could swap it for 2 handbags 2 pairs of shoes and a mac

Are there particular brands that you are drawn to yourself? Either for clothing, technology or tools? Surely you can understand your wife's pleasure in a top-end product even if to you it looks similar to what you can pick up in Primark?
If she drops hints and you're guided by that then you can trust that she will know the value of what you're giving even if to your untrained eye it looks small.
I've spent a small fortune on photography accessories that don't look "wow" to me but my DH practically drools over.

But in your position I'd probably buy something frivolous like the shoes where the value is really in the brand
And then get a pair of earrings from a "normal" jeweller who can talk you through the finer points of gold quality, stone clarity etc so you can feel that you're investing in quality (win-win) btw bargain hard buying jewellery as the mark up is huge and there's room for haggling!

Most women would be thrilled with a Mulberry handbag, and it's a British brand too, which is doubly nice. (Coach are also nice but American brand.)

Does she have a sister or Mum you could present a few ideas to and see what they say?

If she's on something like Pinterest online she may have pinned some fancy things already.

If you're going to make up stand go to a brand you know she likes and take recent photos of her so they can see what sort of colours she likes and get their help

With perfume there are different notes like floral, fruity, musk etc so take a note of what she wears already to the perfume shop and they'll be able to find you a bottle of something along the same lines as what she likes within your budget.

Have a look at what she uses day to day like if there is a particular high end cream she uses then there may be a gift set available.

Diamond studs sound lovely you could walk in and just ask them for help within a budget and they'll talk you through carets and all that. Think you can but Tiffany online but probably overpriced for what they are?

Start putting notes in your phone when she drops hints so Valentine's and birthdays you aren't caught out last minute again. When my finance drops a hint I either write it down or buy it straight away and stash it because he isn't forthcoming with any lists and always says he doesn't need anything.

Coach sounds good. I'm sure she's mentioned Coach before...

How about this one:

www.johnlewis.com/coach-edie-28-leather-shoulder-bag/p3358899?colour=Navy

Oops.. scratch the Mulberry suggestion unless you want to double your budget.

A few years ago my DP looked up what the best perfume to buy was and ended up getting me the same as what his mum wore. Creepy

Don't be that guy asking on mumsnet for a good handbag brand you want to get what she wants not what other posters like

Lovely bag Carl! I'd be thrilled, this is also nice www.johnlewis.com/coach-chelsea-polished-pebble-leather-cross-body-bag/p3074279?colour=Caramel

Or any of these www.johnlewis.com/coach-market-leather-tote-bag/p3262088?colour=Dark%20Vermilion

Very much enjoying handbags I can't afford!!

you want to get what she wants not what other posters like

This

Personally I would never want a boring black bag; the one you posted would be too small for me; and the shoulder strap looks so thin as to be useless. However, perhaps your wife likes black, doesn't carry much stuff and uses the handles rather than the strap...

Handbags are very personal.

I do like the pebbled leather though. But perhaps your wife likes patent leather. How do we know?

Okay, I quite like that pebble one. Could get that and some earring and maybe a few bits when I inevitably end up going over budget.