First Christmas after Santa?

[Annwithnoe]

This is going to be our first year without Santa. The dc are all still very young: 9, 8 and DD will have only turned 7. So we're not ready for a teenage type Christmas by any means. I thought that when this time came I'd be happy to embrace a new phase of Christmas, maybe go to midnight mass, enjoy the lie-in on Christmas morning, etc
I'm a bit nonplussed about how to proceed.

At the moment I'm thinking that I'll still go through the motions of Santa, get them more involved in charity donations to food banks, and picking out toys for other kids (which up to now I've glossed over with them as they thought Santa brought toys to everyone)

I should add that this is also the first year any of them don't believe, so there's been no gradual transition, or keeping magic alive for the younger sibling. We don't have any close relatives with younger kids either.

I'm wondering what the transition has been like for others? Or if you have tips for holding on to some of the magic? Or what it was like for you as a child that first Christmas when you knew about Santa.

I was 10 when i stopped believing (naive eldest child!) And the biggest change in our house was that the following xmas the grownups started getting a visit from F.C.- just some home made sweets the first year, but it's carried on from there and 25-odd years later my DBs and I are still Santa to my parents- while they still do Santa for us! (He did stockings only for us though). There is a great thing online somewhere about how when you no longer believe you become a santa yourself:

"Your heart has grown so much that I think you are ready to become a Santa Claus.You probably have noticed that most of the Santas you see are people dressed up like him. Some of your friends might have even told you that there is no Santa. A lot of children think that, because they aren't ready to BE a Santa yet, but YOU ARE."

I think it's really written in such a way that it could be used to help break the news but it's a way of thinking that I'd like to try to apply to mine when they reach that stage (but i have bigger age gaps between children so I'll have a few years with some believers and some not!)

Just keep it the same, Santa is a lovely, magical idea. They know he's not an actual person but will almost certainly be willing to be caught up in the fun of it.

Yes can't you just keep him up as kind of a magical legend type thing rather than full on fakery? Knowing looks etc?

And we still receive 'stockings'

We've never done Santa. I didn't grow up with Father Christmas as anything other than a storybook character (my family were all about religious traditions instead) and I've never felt I lost out. We didn't do Santa with my children either, but Christmas is still great. My two are teenagers and we still do stockings - when I suggested a few years back that perhaps they had grown out of them they objected very strongly, and now dh and I have one too :)

One thing we've always been pretty keen on is having the children give gifts too, and they have really enjoyed choosing/making them and the anticipation of their gifts being opened. I vividly remember one year one of my nieces getting incredibly excited about her gift for my mum, so much so that she had to tell her first thing what was inside her parcel :)

There are so many opportunities all year to expose dc to the plight of others in the world. There are many charity collections going on and schools always do shoe boxes but so do local charities. I have never gone into how much or little other's dc get my dc know other dc don't have hardly anything so if fc gave then anything they still wouldn't have much or the basics, hence toothbrush in box, basic clothes items etc. I guess I'm saying why cram this message into Xmas and only Xmas. Just do it throughout the year, think of others at Xmas of course but I don't get this heavy laying on small children...

I also agree that you keep putting presents out. I think dd knows she gave a funny smile when I said ask father Christmas... But I am going to keep up the pretense 😁...

My kids are 16, soon to be 13 and 10. Only the 10 year old believes (I think!).

We still do everything the same! Elves leave festive choccie treats very night in December, though I'm fretting over this this year as ds has an aversion to chocolate since having chemotherapy so not sure what I'm going to do yet. "Santa" still brings the pressies, still do baking, festive nights out....stockings...,they love stockings.

Even though the eldest at 16 is quite chilled about christmas and thinks I'm mad for even thinking about it in September she is ALWAYS the first one up christmas morning! Last year she asked what time we were allowed to get up. I told her no earlier than 7am so she set her alarm for 6.50am!

It kind of changes but in a good way x 🎗

I don't think it's a before and after scenario and I don't think you need to overthink it OP. Just carry on doing what you normally do or do something different if you fancy it, and you'll find your way.

Even when they don't believe you still do stockings. My mum didn't stop until I left home.

No santa???? Santa always comes here and my DDs are aged 19 and 25 years! It is still wonderful even if they don't believe.

My DF still does stockings for DB and me! 😂

Carry on regardless!

We used to ask for stuff that father Christmas could bring (ooh, I need some new hair ties, I hope father Christmas brings some) and Mum still snuck into our rooms when we were asleep even in our early 20s. I'm faintly horrified at the idea of Christmas morning order of proceedings changing!

Just carry on as before. The presents will still be a surprise if you don't tell them what they're getting and don't bring them out until they are asleep on Christmas Eve, so they will still be excited.

We introduced a family secret Santa. On 1st December everyone gets an envelope with £10 and someone's name in. Each person buys the gift, wraps it and on Christmas Day puts it on dinner place/chair of the recipient.

It's really funny when people try to guess who was their Santa and everyone gets to think really hard about buying for one person.

Except for me of course. I get to buy for everyone plus do the secret Santa

Someone told dd who was 4 last year that Santa wasn't real. Had to physically restrain dh from going into school! "What can the teachers do on the yard" I asked! He was actually trying to hunt the child down! Still not convinced he was joking! He was furious!
I'm dreading this year, my kids are the type that left alone don't question things but I know the big kids will spread the seed of doubt and I'm not ready! They're still so little.

We convinced her he was btw!

Blimey, I still give my 19 yo DS1 a stocking!!! And it's completely for my benefit.

DS2 , soon to turn 11, has been asking questions about FC.......think this may be his last Christmas of Belief!

DD, 9, is still safe.

Dd is 15y and FC still comes and has his mince pie and drink, and the Christmas fairy still delivers PJs at her grandparents in Christmas Eve. No way is she ready to dispense with the traditions yet!