Please help me make Christmas special!

[inthewoodshed]

Had a hard year so far, and what with various things going on it looks like it might get harder. The one thing I'm trying to focus on at the moment is making Christmas special so that I have something to look forward to. It's just DH and me - no children - and we've spent the last few Christmas days alone so it's failing to be special any more, and last Christmas was a bit of a letdown.

I had thought of going out for lunch, but it looks like a very expensive option and I'm not sure we can really afford to spend £150+ on lunch for both of us, which is what is costs round where we live.

Can anyone help me make Christmas feel special this year? Am open to all suggestions, but we don't want to go away so it'll be things we can do at home (or possibly out for lunch). Would be interested in hearing if anyone has had lunch at a nice restaurant on Christmas day too and if you thought it was worth it.

Thanks in advance!

Pre children we got tipsy and played board games, sometimes went for a walk. It was nice.

We've done both when it was just DH & I. It was expensive to go out for lunch but lovely. However, we really enjoyed making the lunch together and it was so completely perfect for us (no relatives that you have to compromise with). Having our own traditions is great (even just daft stuff).

What about a special breakfast, or get some really nice 'treat' food from M&S?

Don't forget about the build up to Christmas, think about all the little things that will help - decorating the tree & house, go to a show or concert.

Pre children I always went to midnight mass, which made me feel Christmassy. Followed by a tipple & a gift to open could be a nice grown up start to Christmas day.

Christmas lights on Christmas Eve, e.g., Oxford Circus. Then egg nog at home and a cheesy old Christmas movie. If you ever have dc, you can adapt the same traditions, makes them kind of special.

How about skating or theatre on Christmas eve. Then stockings, bucks fizz and croissants for breakfast, church , lunch and presents, lovely walk around country park, home for board games and tv specials? If you really want to feel part ofvthe community then volunteering or church is best.

I wouldn't go out for Christmas lunch. I simply couldn't bring myself to spend £50 plus plus on what is basically an extreme Sunday lunch. If I were you I would start buying vouchers for Waitrose/M&S/ Harrods ( depending on where you live and budget. ) for me it would be M&S. So I would put a tenner a week away which would be £120 by beginning of December. Then I would get their Christmas food brochure when it comes out (October sometime) and have a nice hour with my hubby while we look through it and decide what we want to spend our money on taking in Xmas eve, Xmas day and Boxing Day. Have you any friends/ family who live nearby who you really like? You could have some sort of Xmas get together on the 23rd or Boxing Day - something smart and stylish or fun and casual. Get champagne from Tesco/ Morrisons/ Sainsburys when it's on offer and have a fun night with board games, bubbly and a load of nibbles or a bug casserole you made weeks ago and froze.
If you just want it to be you two you could go to church- there's something special about midnight mass even if you don't go to church. You could go out for a walk somewhere lovely or somewhere that has a special place in your heart. Or, if you want to do something different you could volunteer to help out at an old peoples home or homeless shelter or some local charity. Or invite an elderly person who would be on their own to spend some time with you.
Whatever you decide to do I hope you have a lovely time. Maybe just buy smoked salmon, champagne and stay in your pjs all day watching movies apart from when you hip bck to bed for lots of lovely Un time encumbered sex!!! Edible chocolate paint might be a fun pudding!

Maybe have a think about what specific things you love about Christmas, and find out what those things are for your DH. Mine loves a big sticky glazed ham with cherries and cloves stuck on, that he can eat for a week. Now I like ham but it wouldn't bother me to give it a miss either. But knowing that it has extra meaning to DH, I make a point of talking about the ham I've ordered, mentioning that I've picked it up, putting cloves and ingredients for the cloves on the shopping list, and the whole cooking of it, smelling it cooking, eating sneaky slices of it on Christmas Eve. It all becomes a bit of an event.
It seems silly and a bit contrived when I write it down. I'd never bother mentioning the ham to my dc because they couldn't care less, but making stained glass cookies, and picking over cutters and discussing the relative merits of boiled sweets is a huge part of Christmas to them.
I love decorating the tree, and I do it over a couple of days, taking time by myself. The kids have special decorations that they put up so they join in, but I love it and it's my special thing so I make time for it.
I could have the tree up, the ham cooked and a batch of cookies in the oven without thinking twice about any of it. But because they are special I fuss a bit over them.
Not sure if that's helpful or if we're just a bit mad

I simply couldn't bring myself to spend £50 plus plus on what is basically an extreme Sunday lunch

but your not really buying the meal although one hopes its lovely - its the atmosphere, having somewhere to go - being around other people in a festive mood.

But yes I think saving up for lovely treat food is a great idea...

But as ever its all what you put in sil doesnt do xmas and therefore they get no xmas and wonder why they dont feel festive!

You could arrange a Christmas decoration shopping day with your hubby a few weeks in advance. Buy everything new, making an effort to really decorate your house beautifully together. Combine this with a nice lunch, bottle of champagne etc and some window shoppingChristmas market perusing.

Book tickets to see a carol concert at a local cathedral

Arrange to make homemade gifts or give gifts with clues

Light lots of candles and fairy lights - really set the mood

Spend time creating a 3 course Christmas lunch menu, shop for the ingredients together and cook it together

On Christmas day, make an effort to get really dressed up. Perhaps have a shopping day where you buy an outfit for each other

If you want to be around others, arrange to see friends or you could both volunteer at a local soup kitchen or food bank

Thank you, everyone. There are some really lovely ideas here and DH and I sat down together this evening to have a chat about we want to do. We've decided to go out for dinner on Christmas Eve (at a quarter of the price) and then do what's been said and get some nice M&S food and treats.

I like the idea of thinking about what's important to us too - Ann you don't sound mad; it's a lovely idea, and I think DH likes the sound of doing a ham and I can think of a few other things he would like too.

Going to church is also a lovely idea - we keep meaning to find one that we like (moved to a new area recently) so it would be nice to pick one for Christmas.

MrsP I like the idea of a shopping day with champagne so will suggest that! Carol concert is also a lovely idea.

When we first got together we used to do an advent calendar with little gifts so maybe I'll look into doing that again too.

Thanks, everyone - I know this is very un-MN but I'm really touched by the number of responses and all your suggestions. Things are difficult at the moment for various reasons and it's nice to know there's something to look forward to on the horizon.