In tears ( how can I manage it all)

[OopsDearyMe]

I am so stressed and sad , I have no way to pay for the kids presents until wed and Fri this week! Its all going out of stock and I am so terrified that I won't be able to get them. What they want. I so want it to magical and feel so pressured. I spent £150 just yesterday on what was meant to be a Christmas shop and whenever anyone eats anything I am terrified that I'm gonna have to choose between toys and food. No one else cares about them and they are so amazing, they deal with everything so well and really deserve a good Christmas. They have no other family and their dad has just cancelled seeing them on boxing day. Its not what I wanted for them.
Someone help me please.

By the time the money comes in it'll be the day before christmas eve, too late for delivery.

You can reserve stuff at Smyths and most places are still delivering. I don't really see what the problem is? Why didn't you just get enough food to last a couple of days and get some presents with the £150.

for feeling anxious, I don't mean to be harsh but I think the situation might not be as bad as you think.

Wow Pablo thx

Collect up all the snacky stuff left from the cupboards when the kids are not about and hide it upstairs in the wardrobe till Christmas. Thats the only way I can stop the hoards from eating everything I buy. I get paid friday too, and will do the food shop then. Until then it's soups, shepherds pie things like that for meals, and toast and a couple of packs of biscuits for snacking.

They still send the items and you get them - it's just payment just doesn't leave your bank for 2 weeks.

It's not available for everything but might be worth trying

Please don't worry. This happens so often. Those of us with plenty of money given children so much less and our chidlren aer happy with things like church, walks, carol singing - things that don't cost a single penny and people who hardly any money think to have a happy Christmas they have to spend money on expensive presents they can't afford. I wonder why it has to be like this?

DH works long hours so I often have to take the DC places I'd rather not. I have found shops really helpful in bagging stuff up when I've phoned in advance and explained - sometimes I can pay over the phone, other times at the till but they'll have already printed a receipt with codes on so don't need to get everything out in front of the DC. Also it's amazing how easily distracted they are. And you'd be surprised how helpful shops are when they know you're there for a purpose - again, call in advance, explain, and quite often they'll find someone to distract the children with a remote controlled helicopter demonstration (thank you Smyths last year!!) or similar...

Where are you in the UK op? Maybe one of us could each your kids while you shop :)

if it just you and the kids then I don't think you need to spend to much on special snack foods. Surely just letting them eat sugery crap will be treat enough. IYSWIM

Hide some of the food, I put our Christmas food away in a cupboard so we don't scoff it all in advance!

If you have a debit card, you could sign up for a free trial of amazon prime (if you've not had one already that is). That means things can be delivered the next day. And then order some stuff on Wednesday for delivery thursday? I've looked, loads of shopkins eligible for prime. I Is BB8 the robot thing? They have that too. Thunderbirds stuff, ditto.

That's to get around the kids being with you when you shop issue. This is all presuming you don't live in outer Hebrides or somewhere :)
And agreed, you need to put the food well away from them until it's actually Christmas.

And when you've done all that, go and buy yourself a bloody big bottle of wine and drink it :)

Op I did a little shop and hid it all - can you hide what you got? I know if I had left it out it would have gone!!

Can you really look at your cupboards and lists and really get the cost of the next one down?
I used to go mad in week before but then having lovely food on xmas day never seemed special so I hold right back now until the day and boxing day.

This week we are having cheapy plain food to hold back.

In terms of gifts can you get anything really cheap from pound shops? maybe they are too old to be happy with colouring and stickers? Charity shops - will have loads from people ( like me) off loading un wanted toys....promissory notes are good too - i hitnk martin lewis said this - if money is tight - write a note - after xmas you will get X - still great "!

Op please dont worry - having a tired stressed mum is not what they want, they want that feeling of warmth - family - happiniess...thats the real key.

How old are they?

Don't panic.

All will be fine.
My tip for shopping in Smyths .
Go in with your list, take it to a nice looking sales rep and ask for help. Ask your kids to go and look through the balloons section (close enough for you to see them but far enough away so they can't hear your Chr) whilst you have a chat with the nice lady/ man.
Ask the sales rep to collect what's on your list and process it through the till & package it all up so its not seen by little eyes.
Then go and pay whilst the kids look at the bikes (perhaps ask a member of staff to help you watch them whilst you pay, explain that you have to do this alone)

Ask them to then carry it all out to your car and help you.

Explain the situation if you need to.

I'm sure they will be more than willing to help. Ffs it's Christmas .
Failing that maybe you confirm to the kids that stockings are from Santa (and you can fill those with sweets and cheap things) and gifts are from you, so they at least appreciate they are at Smyths looking at stuff whilst mummy pays for their lovely gifts (they don't have to see the gifts obvs)

op if you can get onto amazon - get the free prime trial - we have just used it it lasted a few weeks - they deliver NEXT DAY, I have done most shopping through them as was just so easy

I would urge you to look into that - and see if you can access the trial. Then you can target a few large good gifts they want and at least have those - in your hand then target fluffly silly stuff from charity - books, sticker books - pound shops - choclate etc for bulk.

^ yes good point re smyths - and also TAKE YOUR OWN BAGS TO DISGUISE!!!

Isn't this what credit cards are for?

In fact I would call smyths in advance and explain situ then they are ready for you!!!

The OP does not have a credit card Jaxs. Lots of people don't.

Hi OP the stress is horrible I know! I have no money and hardly anything coming in, I have been selling things for cash in hand so...

Up until 2 days ago I had no present for 3 children But I had a very rare 3 hours of child care and RAN to Poundland, savers and the works.

From pound land and savers I got MANY MANY stocking fillers, their favourite sweets etc

From savers I got princess and marvel toiletries for stockings

And from the works you can get loads of huge Gordy and games for '2 for £10' stuff that is usually £30-£40! They have a sale on.

So all I have to do now is get 1 or 2 main presents and that will be enough. My kids always end up playing with the small silly joke stocking filler stuff anyways!

I went to Lidl, did a shop for this week and plus some extra XMas stuff which I've kept hidden.

I've also wrote what I've bought on a list good & toys because your be surprised actually how much you've picked up here and there.

Oh another tip is to wrap stuff individually as much as possible because it looks like more :)

Jax, be fair, she can hardly get a credit card before Christmas.

Approved Foods - excellent website for bargain foods of all kinds, sorts and descriptions. Even an organic section with knockdown prices. Heard about it on MN and it's been a lifesaver.

I hope that you and your lovely family have a happy Christmas.

You poor thing, to be so worried over it all. Try and answer your own questions, though...

What if the toys they want are sold out? You'll get them something lovely and different, or an IOU.

What if they see that it's you buying the presents, not Santa? You fudge it! You tell them that Santa brings the stockings now they're this age, and Mum does the big presents.

What if they have to come with you to the shop? Same as above, you tell them it's a special trip to get the presents from Mum. (Not easy or ideal, admittedly, this one, but could work esp if you can click and collect).

What if they eat all the Xmas snacks? They can't if you hide them :-)

Etc. etc.... The point i'm trying to make is that the anxiety is often far worse than the reality of the upcoming scenario, so try to force yourself to imagine what will actually happen if the things you're fearing do happen.

You sound like you are doing your best to give your kids a lovely xmas, and you sound emotionally exhausted. There are many of us in that boat

YOU'VE GOT THIS!!!!

Can you use PayPal and buy online? Often it gives the option to pay after delivery which seems to be about 14 days regardless of actual delivery.

I keep getting caught out with money being taken long after I've received the item, so don't be like me, make a note of what you spend!