What do you class as a normal Christmas?

[SugarNspiceNallThingsNice]

Hi all. Our Christmases are usually quite boring to be honest. I never had particularly good Christmases so I don't really know how to make things a bit more Christmassy!
We don't have any traditions and I would like to make it more special so the kids have nice memories. On the actual day, after the presents have been opened i start the cooking, we eat and that's pretty much it, and that's just the same as my Sunday roasts! What extras do you do with your dinners and what do you do as a family to make the day special? My children are 4, 5 and 11 so not so easy to please all 3. Thanks in advance.

I think that traditions and rituals are what make Christmas special and festive. They are for me anyway. I really look forward to the little things we do each year.

This is our normal Christmas:
23rd Dec - arrive at grandparents house in the evening already decorated and festive. My parents, siblings, nieces, nephews, aunts, uncles and cousins are also usually there by the time we get there.

24th Dec - long walk in the morning followed by hot chocolates at a specific cafe with my sisters. Then decorate the big Christmas tree together as a family and cook some bits for the next day in advance. Church in the early afternoon followed by a meal out in the nearest town. Come home, watch a Christmas film or two or 10 and put all the children to bed and are read Christmas stories with the great grandparents. We then assemble the stockings for the next day, hang them and set the table/prep for the next day while drinking copious amounts of mulled wine, champagne and cocktails.

25th Dec - grandparents or great grandparents take the children hot chocolates in their room at 6.30/7am. 8am we all go downstairs and have a special breakfast (something chocolatey and fruity with pastry). After breakfast we open presents in the living room while listening to Christmas music. Then we go on a long walk in our wellies and get muddy while the food is on. When we come home we dress up in our special Christmas clothes and do the finishing touches to the food. We have starter, then an hours break, then fish, then an hours break, then the main, a break, then pudding, then a break, then cheese. It takes a long time but feels like a real occasion. And the breaks help the kids not get too bored. After we eat we play games and drink champagne and fall asleep. Occasionally we got for a post-food walk too.

Christmas has been the same for as long as I can remember. Except now the houses are more cramped.

The build up is the best bit. We start playing spot the Christmas decorations every time we walk anywhere from November, get our tree on the 1st December and add/ make more decorations through the month. Christmas shopping with hot chocolate, Christmas movies each weekend, Christmas music while we wrap presents, night time walks to look at the lights (our street is one of the OTT ones!), mince pies for supper... more and more excitement as it gets closer. The older 2 are 9 and 11, so 2 Carol concerts to practice for and watch, plus the younger 2 (3 and 4) are in separate nativity plays. We do the shoebox appeal too... Christmas lasts a very busy month! On the actual day everyone wakes up in new pyjamas, we do stockings and santa presents in bed, then downstairs for presents to one another. Kids eat chocolate for breakfast, then play while we wake up with coffee. Family call round for brunch and we give them their gifts, then dinner about 3. Lots of crackers, bad jokes and paper crowns, then crash in front of a Christmas movie. In the evening we eat leftovers, chocolate and play board games (Santa always buys them all aboard game, something crafty to make and a book, so those get used a lot on the day itself). Nothing special tradition wise on the day, just time playing together and relaxed rules about healthy eating, plus enjoying giving gifts.

We used to have most Christmas's with extended family, which on my side meant every year was exactly the same. Then we emigrated and Christmas has been just the four of us ever since. No real traditions which made me a bit anxious that my children didn't have lots of lovely memories. So I asked them what they thought (both older teenagers now) and they both said that they liked our laid back no tradition approach and that that was our tradition.

We do a few things the same every year. Stockings (now our children make them up for dh and me too), new PJs for kids (didn't do that one year and they were most annoyed), presents opened throughout the day, nice breakfast and big fancy meal in the mid afternoon (different roast each year) with flaming Christmas pudding. We used to do crackers and fizz but since our dog has decided that bangs are incredibly scary we stopped as he gets too distressed.

This year we have my mum to stay and I'm a bit anxious as she may find our Christmas chaos approach very wrong!

Special dinner on Christmas Eve, new pjs for kids and watch Home Alone or something similar. On Christmas Day we have Bucks Fizz, coffee and shortbread first thing with Christmas music playing whilst kids open their presents and then I do a fry up later on. Used to get dressed up but not so much nowadays although I always get showered wear makeup. In the afternoon we play games - no tv. We have our main meal in the evening and I try to make it more than just a roast by adding lots of extra accompaniments plus we have crackers to pull and a scratchcard each plus a fun/jokey "table present" (max budget £2). After that we watch tv and open the chocs. I love it all.

I'm a bit worried this year as we may have to stay home rather than going to my parents'. So it'll just be us four (my DSCs always spend the day itself with their mum so they'll come to us on another day).

Quite a few of our presents are games and puzzles though so that usually features during the day.

Christmas Eve is on the weekend this year so H will be off with us. He's normally at work. This will make it special in itself and we will go for a walk hopefully to collect some holly and mistletoe to decorate the house. I'm not booking a panto or anything as youngest is only 18 months and won't sit still but would have if he was older, maybe next year. Me and H open our presents on Christmas Eve as we like the big day to be about the boys. It's our ritual with a glass of Bailey's. I always have Carols from Kings on as well as I love it despite not being religious.
I give my lads Christmas Eve boxes and that will keep them busy doing crafts and reading Christmas books. I agree that it's the run up to Christmas that's the most exciting not the actual day. This year we are doing a Santa boat ride on the Tyne, Santa lunch with some friends with pony rides etc (free apart from cost of meal), a night with a brass band playing carols at a local pub while we have a meal as well as both of our work Christmas dos plus I'm hosting a Christmas onesie night for my friends with H cooking for us, we'll have champagne in the hot tub and stick some Christmas songs on.

Anyway, I digress. Christmas Day is always at my mam's. I paper the doorway with Christmas paper so kids have to jump through it to get to the living room to their presents. Stockings on our bed first. Then open presents one by one to take them all in. There will only be presents from us on the morning, family give theirs later which spreads it out a bit. Get all dressed up then go to mam's. My two brothers alternate between their wives families as well so it depends how many will be there. Think there will just be us four plus mam and stepdad this year but mam is a party in herself. Makes everyone feel so wanted and welcome. We always bring the starter. H does something different every year. Always something special like scallops, gravadlax etc. The sweet comes from a local bakery, something like treacle tart as no one likes Christmas pudding.
My cousin and her family will come over around 4pm with her husband and young son so we will have more champagne then head home. Get kids settled to bed, pyjamas on and watch some Tv.
Get balloons blown up and banners up for son's birthday which is Boxing Day!! We really try to make that special too so have all the family round for brunch the next day.

Christmas morning - bacon sandwiches, then presents (just me and DP). Put on something a bit festive, sparkly jumper or similar, and go for a walk, then get picked up to go to DP's mum's. We have champagne and canapés, then dinner late afternoon. After dinner we watch the Christmas soaps, then back home about 9ish - DP's brother doesn't drink so kindly collects us and drops us off. Pyjamas on immediately!

On Boxing Day either DP goes to the football if it's a home game, or we go in to the sales mid-afternoon. Either way, we go to Nando's for tea, then to the cinema.

None of that's very exciting, but I love our own traditions.

I think like everything its what you put in, this year we are forgoing the Christmas food shop, its unnecessary, we cant eat all the food we buy and we are trimming back costs. But I know I will miss it - as that shop helps get in the spirit.
The mood, the atmosphere, we go full on xmas here, everywhere you look there will be decorations. I have pine scent sprays too which are lovely.

On the day dc will open gifts from FC but we hold back gifts from us - for the meal, between each course as someone is getting it - we hand gifts round which also extends the length of sitting at table esp if your not with talkers. Then everything else really, xmas music, smells, presents - decs...
even though no big food shop i will still get the best smoked salmon we can afford and all the little extras though.

I do feel dressing up helps mark the day as special too, no set plan here but usually dc stay in pjs ( new xmas ones from xmas eve) then before lunch/dinner they will put special dresses on.

Christmas Eve: Prep veg, Christingle service at the church, tea with grandma, Elves have left new Xmas pjs when we get home. Bath and Christmas dvd, lay out sacks and snacks for Santa. Bed.

Christmas Day: open sacks from Santa, breakfast, showered and dressed. Open presents under the tree, get dinner on. Have dinner around 1, clean up and get out for a walk if not wet, home for Christmas tv and playing with new toys/games and relaxing.

We have several traditions as I grew up rushing around being ferried between divorced parents, I didn't enjoy Christmas Day and I would like my DC to have special memories.

On Christmas Eve we wake up to find the elf has gone (my kids are younger than yours and love the elf on the shelf) and left a box to open at sunset containing Christmas PJs, a new book and a hot chocolate stick. The kids have a bath with a Christmas bath bomb from Lush. I usually spend the morning prepping what I can for Christmas dinner. We go out for lunch as a family on Christmas Eve as DH always finished at midday if he's working. Different place each year but last year we went to a dessert cafe which they loved so we may repeat that! Once home we make and sprinkle 'reindeer food'. Maybe watch a film or play a few games before a picnic/party food dinner, Christmas Eve boxes opened and into new PJs with hot chocolate and a book before bed. Not forgetting leaving out Santa's mince pie and Rudolph's carrot!

Christmas morning the kids come into our bed to open their stockings (Santa brings stockings here). We have breakfast which is usually something simple but a bit special like croissants. Then presents before we get dressed, in Christmas tat usually Playing, telly and dinner!

Christmas Eve is my favourite day, I love the build up.

Our xmas goes like this if we are at home

Xmas eve - me and DD (age 8) get up at 6am and go to the big Sainsbury's to do our xmas food shop, we get mac Donald's breakfast on the way back for everyone.
Xmas eve is a quick tidy around and getting things ready, kids make a gingerbread house and then we go to the garden centre for hot choc and a walkabout the xmas stuff.
Evening is then xmas shaped pizzas and a xmas film while tracking santa on norad and scanning fingers to make sure they are on the good list.
Elves bring xmas eve box while they are in the bath consisting of new pjs and some xmas choc and novelties

Xmas morning we wake and open stocking in our bed, then downstairs where the main santa present is in the middle of the floor to be opened. We then have breakfast and get dressed and then open the presents under the tree, we take out one and do it one or two at a time, stopping for coffee and chocolate breaks and for me to pop things in the oven etc.
We then eat mid afternoon after which we watch xmas tv and kids play with toys.
Boxing Day we go for a walk at some point and food is a buffet laid out for people to eat when they want.

For me, the festive feeling comes from the silliness. I don't have dc yet but I have nieces and nephews who are the right age to believe.

My Christmas feeling starts on December 1st when I get woken up by Christmas music (a tradition that's been going on as long as I can remember).

Christmas Eve is spent with my parents, sister, nephew and assorted random
Family members. My dad still looks out of the window and shouts that he can see the sleigh and we all run and try and see (nephew loves this - he's 6).
We dance, sing, eat lots and generally be silly.

Christmas Day is chaos - presents spread randomly throughout the day, food food and more food, family visits and noise.

When I was small but no longer a believer, my parents helped me 'collude' to keep my younger sister believing. She enjoyed the apparent magic and I enjoyed being part of the plan - could you do that with yours OP?

I think the day is what you want it to be. We have spent a few Christmases away from home and they were lovely in their own way too. To me Christmas means relaxing and doing things that make you happy, whatever that is

Carol service on Christmas Eve- I'd love to go to Midnight Mass but my children would be too tired.

We have stockings in the morning but save all the other presents until after lunch (which is something light but lovely). In the morning we have a long walk, then lunch at 1ish. Presents 2-5pm (there are always loads so it takes a long time, and we open them one at a time, not in a mad dash). Lots of games. Christmas dinner is at about 6, and we always turn the lights off to light the pudding. More games after dinner.

No TV at all all day (we set it record everything to watch on Boxing Day, which is a much slobbier occasion).

Go big on the elves!
In my house elves bring tiny little gifts (chocs, hair bands, bouncy balls etc) every day 1-24th Dec
Xmas eve We do a crib service and the elves bring new pjs and books.
Leaving stuff for FC massive highlight in our house too.

Xmas Day -
FC stockings all in pjs in the lounge under the tree.
Nice breakfast.
Get dressed (either new outfits or Xmas jumpers)
Rest of presents very slowly.
Then start the cooking of the big lunch as everyone plays.
Lunch involves crackers and extra hats/silly games etc
After lunch a walk which may involve a quick drink
Then back for playing/xmas films/chocolate eating
Some kind of tea
Everyone stays up a bit late (big deal round ours!)

This year we've even got visitors arriving xmas day (normally boxing day) so will be super exciting.

Wow such lovely Christmases you all have! I can't believe how many of you do the new pjs thing! I have never heard of or thought of that one, I love that idea.
I hope santa visits you all

On Christmas Eve my husband and I always go out for dinner with my mum, step dad, db & sil, then we go to church then to the pub. We have a new baby this year so will miss out the pub this time and go home to put baby to bed and watch a movie with candles lit & nice chocolates.
Christmas morning get up and open presents with Christmas music on then have a fry up for breakfast, showers & get dressed in something Christmassy. The past few years we've done the Christmas meal so at this point people would arrive and have a drink while the dinner cooks. Dining room would be nicely decorated with real tree in bay window and Christmassy candles so everything smells lovely. After dinner we'll put on a Christmas film while our food settles then have some drinks & music until we're tired enough to go to bed.
This year I voted that doing all the cooking etc is too much for us with new baby so think mil & bil are staying Christmas Eve & doing presents /breakfast with us then we're going to my mum & step dads for Christmas lunch before having the evening to ourselves.

The things that make me feel really Christmassy are going to a Christmas market in the lead up and having hot chocolates in the icy cold all wrapped up, choosing and decorating the tree, wrapping presents & church on Christmas Eve.

OP...do you love your children? Are you a decent person?

Are they happy enough at Christmas? If ( and I'm sure) it is 3 yeses.....don't work yourself into a lather trying to be " Christmassy"

Oh, and portable North Pole app in the build up... its the best personalised Santa video message ever, your youngest 2 will love it!