Present Etiquette - does this sound ok?

[ChocoShocklic]

Every year our friends host Christmas Dinner (they insist and love hosting).

They have two adult children of their own . One of these children also has a daughter .

Our friends are generous with gifts for our own two young children .

As a rule , we don't buy for adults at Christmas due to the expense . We don't receive any gifts from anyone and we are perfectly happy with this.

However , we do always take along a nice bottle of champagne and a nice box of chocolates - either a hamper or a posh box from a posh shop .

We spend in the region of £50-£60 with the intention of our friends and their adult children sharing it on Christmas Day .

We also buy a gift for the child of the adult child (so the hosts grandchild).

Does this sound ok ? Or should we be buying individual gifts ?

It will get very costly if we have to buy gifts for all the adults attending.

I think that sounds fine. We host a lot & do it as we enjoy it. I always expect to cover the cost of all food & drinks myself. If someone was a bit cash strapped, I would much rather they spent their money on their DC or their gas bill and I got to spoil them with a nicer meal and all of the trimmings than they may otherwise be able to afford.
I'm not a saint. I obviously appreciate it if someone brings something but I am just as grateful if they are a considerate guest who, for example, makes an effort to speak to my fairly deaf great aunt whose only topic of conversation is her health or who leaps up and grabs the kitchen roll if someone spills a drink just as I'm getting the turkey out of the oven. The one guest we regularly have who annoys me is BIL as he arrives empty handed, does nothing & expects to be entertained. Another is a friend who turns up with a cheap bottle of wine and, even if we are only offering wine or beer, announces he fancies a G&T and goes on about it until we feel obliged to offer him one and then he starts offering it to others in a generous host type manner and almost implying he has provided the gin.
Oh, now I'm on a role, the other guests who annoy me are those who say "I make amazing brownies. Everyone loves them. I'll bring some" and then doesn't bother to do so. I have now learned that unless I know the person very well & know I can rely on them, anything they provide is a bonus rather than a definite contribution. I learned my lesson when I held a dinner party, two people offered to provide a dessert but neither bothered on the day (one forgot, one was too busy shopping) so we had no dessert that day.

I think if you offer to help/bring food that's different. As long as your gift to the child is as generous as theirs and the wine and chocs are decent I think it's ok.

What you're doing sounds just fine and as others have said, it's worked well for years.

Definitely wouldn't go down the individual gifts route as they may then feel they have to reciprocate. Presents for their grandchildren are perfect.

I think what you do is a lovely touch and I am sure well received by your hosts. Don't let the spirit of Christmas get lost in all the mercenary rubbish

I think what you do is a lovely touch and I am sure well received by your hosts. Don't let the spirit of Christmas get lost in all the mercenary rubbish