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Original poster

ATHEISTS - what goes on in your house? (and Pagans if you're interested)

67 replies

MrsTerryPratchett · 11/12/2015 04:19

DH and I are atheists. After much compromise and tradition and stuff we...

Do have Santa (but when DD [5] says he doesn't exist we don't try to convince her)

Go to a 'living' nativity. Which is weird but really cool.

Don't talk about the actual 'story'.

Take part in carol stuff, Hanukkah with my Jewish friends and Christmas concert (hideous mash-up of traditions). We live somewhere with separation of Church and State so school doesn't do Nativity.

Presents, booze, a Muppet Christmas Carol, holly and ivy and a tree (star, no angel).

What is part of winter and Christmas for you?

OP posts:
LadyDeadpool · 11/12/2015 11:31

Pagan - most of the christian stuff is taken from Yule anyway so we - Have a tree, yule log, gifts, santa, no nativity stuff, no carol singing but christmassy pop songs. We don't do gifts for adults its all about the kids not having them feel different or excluded for whats a huge thing for the majority.

We celebrate Yule on the 21st.

Also Tree is topped with a Castiel pop vinyl a little subtle humor for the adults in the house.

Raxacoricofallapatorius · 11/12/2015 11:49

LadyDeadpool, I have a Castiel on my tree too!

Tim Minchin's White Wine In The Sun is my favourite Christmas song. It makes DH and 8yo DD sob. It does capture the spirit of Christmas for us.

BornToFolk · 11/12/2015 12:05

time off work, good company, lovely food, booze, presents, house sparkly & clean. A mid winter feast.

Yes, that's pretty much what I tell DS Christmas means to me...A chance to catch up with family and friends and basically cheer ourselves up in the middle of the winter when it's dull and dark outside. I do also tell him that it's a time for thinking of others too, so lots of emphasis on giving presents as well as receiving as well as giving to charities.

We don't attend any church services or have any nativity sets etc. I do love Christmas carols though and always watch Carols from Kings on Christmas Eve, mainly in memory of my Granny who loved watching it, though she was an athiest too.

purplepolkadots · 11/12/2015 12:21

Our family is very involved with the church - children in church choir, go to lots of services. This is because they love singing, and singing in the Church of England is the best you can get in this country, certainly as a child. Great musical training and beautiful music. Churches and cathedrals are openly happy for people to join the choir without being Christians.

HeadDreamer · 11/12/2015 12:30

I don't think about being atheist and christmas. It's just normal to me! NZ is so much more atheist than here and we don't even do nativity at school. We just went to our first this year and DH and I have to try very very hard to not make snide comments. Grin Oh and the straight face on not saying Jesus is a bunch of BS. I don't want DD to offend christians.

What's a live nativity?

We just have lunch, exchange presents, have days off. I'm going to a pantomine with DD1 this year.

We do advent calendar, decorations, trees, lights and stockings too. They aren't christian to me. When DD asks about the Jesus story, I just told her it's the story of christmas. (Along the same line as the moon goddess being the story of mid autumn festival).

I think out of all the things people do for christmas, surely it's only going to church that's religious?

HeadDreamer · 11/12/2015 12:32

And yes I will tell DDs that Christmas is originally a Pagan holiday. Same with easter. Because that's the truth.

We have a snowman on top of our tree. DD1 calls it Olaf.

TPel · 11/12/2015 12:32

I bloody love Tim Minchin. Makes me sob too.

I'm an atheist and love Christmas. It is a light in the dark of winter. I don't do church or carols but I do do joy and peace.

eatingworms · 11/12/2015 12:44

We do all the traditional stuff. My son knows the whole nativity story and this year I'm going to take him to church for a Carol service. I still love the whole Christmas 'thing' even if I don't believe in God. At the moment DS says he does believe in God (he's 6).

dontcallmethatyoucunt · 11/12/2015 12:44

'tis the season to be jolly. It is time with family and friends and so for me it's an excuse. We don't go to church though, or say grace. That stopped for me when I stopped going to the vicarage for Christmas!

AllMyBestFriendsAreMetalheads · 11/12/2015 13:01

We do have a nativity set, but it's a 'children's' one and it's mainly for the kids to play with. I see the nativity story as about kindness, helping others less fortunate than you - it can be a nice starting point for thinking about charity with children.

Musidora · 11/12/2015 13:21

Funnily enough, it was my very religious grandparents (1 a vicar, the other a member of the CoE synod) who had a problem with Father Christmas, rather than any of the atheists in the family. They felt that it was wrong to tell a knowing lie to children. Presumably because once a child realised that their parents had lied to them about one big guy who knew if they were naughty or nice and rewarded them accordingly, they might start questioning whether their parents were lying about the other one...

Personally, as an atheist, I have no problem with the Christian aspect or imagery of Christmas as I feel that Christianity (as well as other religions) is part of our cultural history and is extremely interesting as such. I just don't do the actual worshipping.

Doublebubblebubble · 11/12/2015 13:32

We have "Christmas" although when DD isn't in the room we refer to it as present day. We don't have any "christian" imagery however (a nativity scene for instance) as that doesn't sit quite right with me... DD was an angel in the nativity (which was a proper nativity) and fully believes in god and jesus atm (she is 6) and we've no intention of telling her different until she asks the question. Same for santa. Same for harry potter.

whatsagoodusername · 11/12/2015 13:53

I celebrate it as a family holiday, not religious. We do Santa, presents, lots of food. We've been to a few Christingle services with more religious friends, but tbh I have no idea what they were about because I didn't listen. It made atheist DH a bit grumpy though Grin The DC enjoyed it.

I think it's important to know the story of Christmas, but mainly in a historical/social context as opposed to religious. We don't have a nativity set although I would quite like one - I think they are beautiful and we always had fun playing with ours as children.

whatsagoodusername · 11/12/2015 13:54

And we have a Christmas Moose on the top of our tree.

BertieBotts · 11/12/2015 13:59

Atheist family here. We do presents, tree, family phone calls/skype (would visit if we weren't in another country). We don't have a nativity or talk about Jesus specifically although if it comes up at school we would (and have) talked about the Christmas story and the origins of the tradition, but it's mostly just a cultural thing for us. It's about family, it's about giving, it's about getting together and eating a meal and spending time together. And we watch Doctor Who Grin

Because we are abroad I like to go to a Christmas carol singing event which is run here in English because it's just nice to hear the English songs. We still sing along to the religious ones.

GinIsTheBestChristmasSpirit · 11/12/2015 14:15

I know Christians who don't do Santa (apparently because if they later tell the kids Santa isn't real the kids will automatically assume God / Jesus isn't real either) I also know many who do.

We do Santa but only until the kids start questioning. We do tree, gifts, carols, nativity.

NotCitrus · 11/12/2015 14:22

Christmas-loving atheist here. We talk about how it's a time of year to celebrate days getting longer again and to give us something to look forward to, and to take time off and be nice to everyone and make people happy by giving presents. No, ds, it's not just about getting lots of presents. Really. We work hard to spread it over the '12 days of Christmas' so it's a proper festival and not too much on any one day (kids are 7 and 4).

And some people celebrate partly because of the Christmas story or because they think Jesus was great, even if all the bits of the story aren't true it's a good story and if Jesus said to be nice to people, that's a good idea.

Both kids were in nativity plays for the first time last year (nursery/school) but most years it's a Christmas concert for practicality. Have just dug out a tea towel for dd to be a shepherd...

mercifulTehlu · 11/12/2015 14:28

Surely the vast majority of Brits are not practising Christians, and celebrate Christmas in a largely non-religious way but with a few bits which are based on religious traditions. I doubt that my Christmas (as an atheist ) differs much in religious content from any but the fairly small number of properly strict Christians.
Like most atheists/agnistics I know, I don't usually go to church at Christmas (but am happy to go to a carol service there if the dc or visitors fancy it). We sing and listen to carols and we send cards which might sometimes have nativity-based pictures on them. I don't avoid religious stuff at Christmas - it's just a story to us, and one I'm fond of as it's been part of Christmas all my life.

steakpunararemediumwelldone · 11/12/2015 14:31

We go most things but nothing church related. DD sings carols but we abstain from her schools christmas church visit and we don't attach any 'birth of jesus' stuff to it. DD knows that we believe 'christmas' pre-dates christianity and if you hear her talk she will talk about the nativity the same way she talks about arthur christmas, a nice made up story you get this time of year.
We did Santa big time though, until this year when her belief has trickled out.

StDogolphin · 11/12/2015 14:49

Our focus is on quality family time after a really busy few months. We attend the school things but look respectful when prayers are said. We do Father Christmas and stockings and I am very interested in the mythology behind the current traditions.

Original poster
MrsTerryPratchett · 11/12/2015 15:34

Real mixed bag. I suppose I follow the Tim Minchin school as well. Everyone needs a day to think of or be with family. Like him, I'm far away from them.

Santa is interesting. Interesting that some Christians don't do that because of ditching all mythical stories. Never thought of it that way!

I think I like the sparkly, be nice to people, food and family aspect. Which Paganism/Yule/midwinter festivals does anyway.

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MrsUnderwood · 11/12/2015 16:20

Atheist/pagan household here. We do all the regular Xmas stuff except the nativity. We go out on Yule. I'm the only pagan and practise privately so I don't make a big deal if it, especially as most of the traditional Yule trappings are now part of Christmas.

MrsUnderwood · 11/12/2015 16:22

Oh, we do Santa, and we also do St Nicholas on the 5th/6th.

SausageSmuggler · 11/12/2015 16:28

In our house we talk about Santa and the Christmas story but that's all it is to us: a story. Even though we aren't religious I think it's a nice way of thinking about Christmas that isn't solely based around presents.

myotherusernameisbetter · 11/12/2015 17:03

Presents, Tree (usually with just a light on top but that's usually because I cant find the star),Cards, Movies, Food, Board Games, Family time etc.

Kids were involved in Natvity when they were little but it's a decent enough story.

Staunch atheist but that's not how I define my life. I just don't believe in or worship a god.

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