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Christmas

From present ideas to party food, find all your Christmas inspiration here.

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Original poster

Where to spend Christmas Day?

21 replies

Iamnotloobrushphobic · 15/11/2015 17:15

I am trying to decide where we should spend Christmas Day. DH has asked me where we are spending it and I really can't decide what I want to do this year. We usually spend Christmas Day at my mums house and she cooks dinner and hosts us and a few other family members. We have a new baby this year and I suspect that DH wants to spend Christmas Day at home. However, DH cannot cook so I would have to do all of the cooking. I wouldn't mind doing the cooking on Christmas Day but we always host DHs family on Boxing Day and I have to cook for everyone (because the food would be inedible if DH cooked and probably served at midnight by the time he finished faffing and asking me questions) and I don't really want to cook a big meal both days.
I kind of like the idea of spending Christmas Day at home, but not the idea of cooking on both Christmas Day and Boxing Day as well as breastfeeding a small baby.
I suppose I really want to know if I am being unreasonable in going to my mums on Christmas Day even though I know DH wants to stay at home.

OP posts:

Savagebeauty · 15/11/2015 17:17

I'm sure your dh can put M and S food in the oven.

Savagebeauty · 15/11/2015 17:17

And why are you hosting on Boxing Day with a new baby? Let someone else do it

RJnomaaaaaargh · 15/11/2015 17:21

I reckon your dh is learning to cook fast.

There's no such thing as "can't" Cook - there's can't be arsed, never been shown or low in confidence. That's it.

Original poster

Iamnotloobrushphobic · 15/11/2015 17:22

There isn't anyone else who can host Boxing Day as the 'guest list' includes DSS and DSD and if we don't host then DH wouldn't get to see them over Xmas. It has always been the case that their mum has them Xmas day and we have them on Boxing Day along with a few other members of DH family (who can't host because they all come from different regions).
We can't afford to feed everyone prepared m&s food as it would be much more expensive than cooking from scratch and we are on a tightish budget.

OP posts:

Original poster

Iamnotloobrushphobic · 15/11/2015 17:24

He really is hopeless in the kitchen and my confidence in Him not to kill one of our children who has severe allergies is very limited. DH can manage to make breakfast and very simple lunches but his skills don't go beyond that. He has even managed to mess up hard boiled eggs on so many occasions I have lost count.

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Cloudyflower · 15/11/2015 17:28

If you can't afford m and s to feed everyone on Boxing Day could you get it for yourselves for Christmas day? Then your dh could just put it in the oven.

Or you could serve a cold buffet Boxing Day which your dh could prepare? Do people really need another big cooked meal after the Christmas dinner the day before?

Original poster

Iamnotloobrushphobic · 15/11/2015 17:28

I just recalled the last time he heated a m&s dine in for two he put he potatoes in the oven still in the plastic wrapper (which melted) and the last time he heated himself a ready made pie he burnt the top but the inside was cold. There is good reason that I don't eat his cooking.

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ImperialBlether · 15/11/2015 17:31

I think you should go to your mum's. It's all very well your husband saying he wants you all to stay home, but it means so much work for you that you'll be exhausted by the end of Boxing Day. Why not do something special together on Christmas Eve?

attheendoftheday · 15/11/2015 17:38

Unless your dh has some kind of sn I am sure he can manage to cook. If he doesn't it's because he doesn't want to. You shouldn't be cooking with a tiny baby.

Orangesox · 15/11/2015 17:38

M+S throw in the oven for you both on Xmas day which I'm sure you can managed between you both? DH picks up order, you put in the oven after following the instructions, DH plates up?

I'm not disputing his general ineptitude in the kitchen, but it genuinely sounds like he can't be arsed if he can't be bothered to read the instructions on a ready meal? My DP was the same until I started to work late in the evenings and he had to manage or he'd go without... It's amazing how much they can learn when they start to go hungry

For the family gathering... I'd be inclined to go seasonal buffet - probably heavily rely on frozen party bits from your supermarket of choice and ask everyone to bring a suitable dish or indeed any appropriate leftovers from their own Christmas dinner.

I'm sure your guests won't be so unreasonable to expect full blown technicolor Christmas with a new baby in the house?

Original poster

Iamnotloobrushphobic · 15/11/2015 20:15

We could go down the route of a buffet on Boxing Day as my DH can manage sandwiches and puttibg a few pre prepared canapés on plates. I am still inclined to go to my mums on Xmas day though.
My DH isn't lazy, he is just hopeless at cooking. He works full time and does all the washing and ironing and a decent share of the cleaning despite me being a SAHM.

OP posts:

Original poster

Iamnotloobrushphobic · 15/11/2015 20:17

And we can't do m&s throw in the oven on Xmas day as one of our children has severe allergies and can't eat the majority of pre prepared foods.

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ImperialBlether · 15/11/2015 20:26

I think it would be more relaxing for you to have everything done for you on Christmas Day, bearing in mind how much you'll be doing on Boxing Day.

Original poster

Iamnotloobrushphobic · 15/11/2015 21:02

Thanks imperial. I think going to my mums on Christmas Day and a simple buffet on Boxing Day is the right way to go.

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BuildersBum · 15/11/2015 21:28

Xmas day at home, without 'xmas dinner', something you all like that's easy.

Any takeaways going to be open?

Original poster

Iamnotloobrushphobic · 15/11/2015 22:14

We can't do takeaways due to child's multiple allergies. A takeaway or even most ready meals would mean use of an epipen and a trip to the hospital. In any case, the two oldest children are old enough to want a proper Christmas dinner with all the trimmings that they are used to. I can manage to cook a decent dinner despite having a new baby, I just don't want to cook two big dinners on two consecutive days.

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Littlemousewithcloggson · 16/11/2015 00:16

I would go to your mums. Not only is it easier for you but she is probably really looking forward to having your new baby there too

Littlemousewithcloggson · 16/11/2015 00:19

We also host my step kids on Boxing Day and do a buffet, I refuse point blank to cook full Christmas meals two days running . It's usually the gammon left over from Christmas Day tea, baby potatoes, crusty rolls, cheese board and party type food!

WhenWillYouMakeMyTelephoneRing · 16/11/2015 00:28

Yes, go to your mum's. If your DH isn't keen, you can point out that it's the cooking issue that makes staying home both days a non-starter.

GrimmauldPlace · 16/11/2015 06:49

How far away is your mums? Can you not spend some time at home, go to your mums for lunch, spend some time there and then have evening at home with kids and DH? That's what we're doing this year. We normally have Christmas day at home on our own with the kids but MIL has offered to host us this year. Can't wait to have Christmas lunch cooked for me! But we'll be going home late afternoon as PIL's will be visiting other family. If OH doesn't like it, tell him he'll have to take some cooking classes pretty sharpish.

Original poster

Iamnotloobrushphobic · 16/11/2015 08:03

That is probably what we will go mrs fizzy. My mums is only half an hour away so we will go about 3pm, eat about 4pm and leave about 7pm. That's my most recent plan, but knowing my mum dinner will be served at least an hour later than planned because her timings are always way off.

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