Thanks for all your replies.
I've looked up some figures and set up an Excel sheet now.
The activities we have booked including Santa train, breakfast with Santa and a panto total £95.
We are also going on a Christmas markets trip in Europe in December, I estimate we will spend up to £700 all in for that, including 3 nights in a city apartment and one night in a cabin on the ferry.
Food and drink- DH is fortunate to get to bring home quite a few gifted bottles of wine etc from suppliers most Christmases, so I'll earmark £30 on top of that.
Food- I usually cook 2x large chickens instead of Turkey which is cheaper, and as I'm not a great cook keep the meal pretty simple with no starter, and Xmas pud and a trifle as dessert choices. MIL has offered to bring crackers. Then cold buffet items for the evening. So maybe £50 for Christmas Day food.
Gifts- for DD probably £50, have already bought her main gift which looks quite impressive (for her, anyway), plus some little bit for stocking etc. Its also her birthday soon after Christmas so I don't go overboard for that reason. DS's main gift has cost £60, it was a real bargain at less than half price, and will only spend approx another £20ish on his stocking and few other bits.
DH- I usually do him a stocking and then do similar to a PP with putting the money in lieu of a large gift towards a weekend away somewhere during the year and we really value the couple time together.
DM- approx £50, same for the in laws. Not many more family members and we have agreed a £20 limit each.
I've been buying gifts throughout the year which helps spread the cost.
Oh dear, adding all that up totals over £1000! Although if it wasn't for the 3 day break abroad it would be far less and we won't be going again after DD starts school next September.