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Christmas

From present ideas to party food, find all your Christmas inspiration here.

Original poster

No money at christmas

53 replies

sockmonkey · 14/11/2006 08:43

DH has been out of work for a while now. Every month we struggle to get by. Yesterday he lost out on another job, and I just feel so depressed. It was really the last chance to get employment (and thus a payday) before christmas.

I am completely not bothered for myself, but for my DSs. DS1 is 3 now and is sooo excited about Santa coming. DS2 is only 1 so he wont know any better. I am sat here crying now just thinking about it. We have already sold pretty much everything of value that we have to pay to get the car through MOT & Taxed.

I know I am not the only one who is skint at christmas, but I feel like such a failure to my little boys.

OP posts:
noddyholder · 14/11/2006 08:45

There is a budget xmas thread somewhere but I can't do links sorry!Start now buying little bits at the supermarket and in cheaper shops.Don't buy each other anything and do budget food shopping for the next few weeks and spend what you save xx

UCM · 14/11/2006 09:04

You kids are at the age where they won't appreciate presents anyway. Ok maybe the older one will enjoy pulling the wrapper off, so wrap up some stuff from charity shop. He WILL NOT notice that it's 2nd hand. Also see snowman night thingy and do some cookies & decorations out of plain white paper with him. I can send you some craft stuff to make decorations if you would like. Please don't feel like a failure. Spending time together as a happy family is so much more important than unwrapping expensive gifts. You could buy some glider planes from the pound shop, wrap up warm and take them out for a lovely walk on Christmas day. Don't get turkey, get a chicken, it really doesn't matter. I have not spent loads of money on presents this year as I feel that making the time spent together more interesting takes first place.

CorrieDale · 14/11/2006 09:15

The NCT usually have toy sales in Novmeber - check out the NCT site for details of a sale near you. You can get really cheap toys there, generally in good nick. UCM is dead right - they won't notice they're not new. And your time with them is way more valuable to them than any number of new toys.

expatinscotland · 14/11/2006 09:19

Exactly, UCM.

We're lucky in that there is loads of free stuff going on in our city - Christmas storytelling at the Botanics, the lighting of the Xmas tree, carol services, etc.

All free and full of other little children.

DD1, also 3, is most excited about these events rather than presents.

Also about eating goodies, which are cheap to make.

How about making Xmas deccies? VERY cheap w/salt dough.

We used to make paper chains out of scrap paper, scrap wallpaper, etc. and have a blast.

Also cuts out from paper to hang in the windows and stamps made out of potatoes.

cremolafoam · 14/11/2006 09:32

sockmonkey-so sorry you are feeling a failure- you are not. we can certainly not afford Christmas this year either and there will be hundreds like us. so far my money sving ideas are:
a book of vouchers for dd- which will include
trip to cinema
, bowling, mini golf
day at the beach with bike
trip to country park etc. this will spread the cost of treats over the year

for the stocking- i raid the local charity shops bit by bit over the next few weeks for books and clothes toys and videos. never spend more than a £1
for mum and MIL and teacher have bought a cheap packet of hyacinth bulbs and planted them. will do nice gift wrap for them

agree with dh not to exchange a gift

please don't feel bad. lots of people on here will give you ideas

helenhismadwife · 14/11/2006 11:05

Sockmonkey

Do not feel like a failure, there are so many people in your position, I have been there as well my older ones always had 2nd hand from either car boot sales, local free ads papers or charity shops when they were younger they truely dont know or mind to them its a present that is wrapped, new to them and exciting.

Have you perhaps got any of your childrens outgrown baby clothes or baby equipment that you could put on the for sale/swap board here, also put wanted ads on for the things you would like for your little ones.

Also have you spoken to your health visitor, I know this may sound a strange thing to say but when my older 4 were younger we had no money to spare,and were in a similar sounding position to you and my hv put me down on a list I think it was something to do with the round table and we were incredibly lucky and got vouchers for using in Asda I think it may have been woolworths as well.

Sorry I cant give you any more advice but dont feel a failure, you truely dont have to spend a lot of money to have a great christmas

helenhismadwife · 14/11/2006 11:06

cremola what a brilliant idea the vouchers are

noddyholder · 14/11/2006 11:06

cremola I am going to do that voucher thing for ds just because I think he'd like it!

Bananaknickers · 14/11/2006 11:11

Sock monkey where abouts do you live?

marymillington · 14/11/2006 11:14

what UCM said. wise lady

marymillington · 14/11/2006 11:16

also, tons of good stuff for kids seems to come up on freecycle, you might find some gifts for the DSs there.

sunnysideup · 14/11/2006 11:16

sockmonkey, I do know how horrible it is to be so broke but I tell you what, the year that I was MOST broke, was the year that I had the most creative chrismas ever and my mum still talks about a couple of the pressies I found for her (junk shop finds, I'm talking about £1 each!)

Just think of it as making you think a bit more, rather than it stopping you having a good time.

You are lucky that your boys are not old enough to be materialistic so whatever you get will be exciting...our local charity shops have had some lovely toys for about 50p or a pound, and your Ds's won't realise they are not new.

People have said it all already really, I just wanted to say go for it, you can have a lovely time; your local council should be offering a good few free christmas activities at libraries/museums etc.

The things I am most looking forward to this year and getting excited about, I've just realised, are free; going for a walk round our little town when it's dark on christmas eve, for a tour of the christmas lights, then coming home for hot chocolate and to watch scrooge on the telly (old video, 50p job from the charity shop as it happens!) going for a walk with the GP's uncles and aunts on the beach on christmas day....visiting a local castle (free entry) with other family a couple of days after christmas....

of course the presents and other bits are lovely but REALLY don't get caught up that it matters that much.....I'm sure you can get some really thrilling, magical times for your boys this year..

CountessDracula · 14/11/2006 11:22

sockmonkey, you should try freecycle for presents

I wanted to get dd a wooden farm for her birthday, put and ad on freecycle and someone gave me one her dds had grown out of (plus loads of animals!) All for nowt!

Where do you live?

I had a huge tidy out of dd's stuff the other day I have tons of stuff that would be good for stocking fillers would you like me to send you a parcel of it? It will only go on freecycle otherwise!

sunnysideup · 14/11/2006 11:28

oo yes, another vote for freecycle, it is amazing the quality of stuff that people give away sometimes!

jessicaandrebeccasmummy · 14/11/2006 11:33

I know the feeling.

Once we have sorted family out (that are not just happy to get a handmade card because they are so bloody precious), it has left us with virtually £60 a week to live on - and that doesnt include having got presents for my dad, DH or girls.

Im worried sick, but hey, life throws these things at us and we have to make the most of it.

Bananaknickers · 14/11/2006 11:36

There are lots of us skint this year aren't there.We have taken a morgage holiday to pay for pressies for the children this year .

Dottydot · 14/11/2006 11:44

Just wanted to empathise - we had a stoney broke Christmas last year and this year's not looking much better. Things we did/I'd recommend:

Don't buy ds2 anything - we didn't get ours anything when they were 1 - he'll play with the paper. Or just get him teeny weeny things - seriously, don't spend more than £10 on him, if that.

Don't get friends/family anything - explain to them - if they're good friends and nice family they'll understand. Last Christmas the present which went down the best was a homemade calendar we made with photos of our ds's, for the grandparents. If you've got a digital camera you're laughing. I found a calendar template on the web and made a document with a different photo of the boys for each month, printed it off, hole punched the top and tied it with wool! They all love it and have demanded one for this year - cost nothing!

Dp made mince pies and cakes as well for the grandparents - we spent a few quid on some nice little bags, put half a dozen mince pies in each and tied them up. Minimal cost.

I also knitted the grandmas a nice scarf each - slightly more expensive because the wool cost about £10 per scarf. This year I'm knitting scarves for the grandads/uncles - much cheaper wool so about £3 a scarf!!

So spend what you can on ds1 - like you say, he'll be excited. But I'd hunt out stuff at charity shops/car boot sales - you can get fab toys for virtually nothing and he won't know. If there's maybe 1 - 2 things he really really wants, concentrate on that and then get the rest from charity shops. Ds's love going to our local charity shop - there's always something they can find for 50p and it gets played with just as much (or as little!!). If you get quite a few little things it'll pad out ds's Christmas stocking.

Good luck - it's easier said than done, but try to have a plan of action for the next few weeks and do some hunting at car boots (which are good fun anyway) - there'll be lots of school christmas fairs coming up and they usually have nice cheap bits to buy.

Dottydot · 14/11/2006 11:46

Or if you haven't got a digital camera, get a friend with one to take 12 photos and print them out for you!

Dp and I also agreed last year not to buy each other anything.

foundintranslation · 14/11/2006 11:47

sockmonkey - look at the 'please read - everyone' thread in 'Christmas'

Bozza · 14/11/2006 11:48

Take CountessD up on her offer. And get over onto soapbox's thread.

Bozza · 14/11/2006 11:48

snap - fit!

Nemo1977 · 14/11/2006 11:49

Dont feel a failure at all hun. The only reason my kids have a decent present this year is that I got my maternity grant and had already been bought my double pram. Your little ones are the same age as mine and they really dont care/notice if something is second hand etc. Christmas is about family not about presents.

ratclare · 14/11/2006 11:52

sockmonkey ,dont cry your are by no means a failure ,your little ones love you , tbh they would probably love making decorations with you more than any piece of expensive plastic tat . Charity shops often have great stuff ,most of my dds wardrobe and toybox is from charity shops , i bought a brand new next coat with tags on last week for a neighbours son because it was such an unbelievable bargain i couldnt leave it £2 ! So go and have a hunt round and you might be pleasently suprised ,ive had great little tikes stuff ,elc stuff etc all for a couple of pounds .

CHUNKYMUNKEY · 14/11/2006 12:51

Have you got a local Netmums site. They have a nearly New Section on there. I have sold things on there and also got some lovely bargains for my little girl, they are in really good condition. Def worth a look. I know how you feel about the money situation i think loads of people are in the same boat this xmas.

LadyVickyOfBeckinghamPalace · 14/11/2006 13:19

Whereabouts are you sockmonkey?

You're not a failure.. Listen, those children will love you no matter what.
I still cry about this: When I was in 2nd yr of secondary school we were supposed to be going on a school trip. The fee was £5. My mum didn't have £5 to give me. Even on the morning of the trip she was in knots, trying to explain to me that I couldn't go as we just didn't have the spare money that week, I was fine, honestly, and when I went into school I told my friends that I didn't want to go on the trip, my mum said we could have a day at home and bake cakes etc.. do our nails... they were a bit envious! lol Anyway, about 40minutes into the Emglish lesson a man knocked on the door, and it was my dad.. he walked right over to me, in his ripped coat that we wore to cut sticks to sell for £1 a bag, and handed me 5 pound coins to pay for my trip. I know he had went and cut the sticks to sell that very morning to pay for my trip... shit I am crying writing this..

Material things don't matter, it could have been £1000 or 1p he give me that day... what mattered was that he loved me enough to go and do that.

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