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Christmas

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Original poster

How do you deal with birthdays close to christmas?

75 replies

tinytotmummy · 12/11/2006 20:33

My dd will be 2 on New Years Day, and although this year I know she won't completely understand, I just wondered how to manage the whole present thing with so much in one week? Is there anyone with any good tips as to what I could do in the future, and also is it a terrible thing to buy a joint birthday and xmas present? What happens with parties when they get older? Any tips/advice would be great

OP posts:
Steppy1 · 12/11/2006 21:54

Snap Bienchen...our DS share the same birth date !!!!!

joanna4 · 12/11/2006 22:07

My birthday is 27th december and i too resented the whole joint present thing.Another big no no is birthday pressies wrapped in xmas paper!One year i opened all my birthday pressies by accident this way.Now i am all grown up my hubby and kids go to special lengths to keep the 2 seperate.

flibbertyjibbet · 12/11/2006 22:08

What if we do a 'non birthday' in say February for DS1 so his chums can come along? Take em all to one of those ball pit/tarzan activity centres? And just have family on the actual day (though not his uncle who shares birthday, he prefers not to share his celebrations with a toddler!).

all4girlz · 12/11/2006 22:47

Think that most people have covered it but just wanted to share what we do.
mine are the 28th dec and 17th jan so we went for joint party at the end of jan and made the planning and stuff really exciting for them.
I have a friend with a dd born on the 27th dec and another whose dd shares my dd 's b'day so we all ready have two b'day parties that week any way.
We tend not to give chrstmas presents to the friends but make sure they all get nice birthday presents.
I had a baby in may so we too now have a balance bt it des not help that dh is late Dec too aargh!!
Have fun whatever you do mine think it is great as they got two birthday cakes last year too.

twinsetandpearls · 12/11/2006 22:47

My ex had his birthday on xmas eve - we divorced !

makemineadouble · 12/11/2006 23:48

Just gonna answer op

My b'day is 30th dec (how awfull) my dd is 31st dec(sh*t everyone busy)

My family always did mine at easter big house parties, I never realised! when I was older I moved it, nobody had any money to party the night before new years eve!

My beautiful daughter never spent a new years eve with me (coz it's her birhday!)since she's been grown up, I mean well 16 , ha ha , but this year she's 21! and want's to spend it with me! her siblings, my parents and her step dad, wow!!! so we're all going for drink and meal in local Indian, they have arranged a cake and balloons and been lovely I still can't believe she'd choose to spend this night with us! I have tried however to make it her 21st! not new years eve good luck x

bettythebuilder · 13/11/2006 00:15

Well, dds b'day is on Christmas Day - she'll be 4 this year, and we're still trying to get it right!
Let's face it, it's a bit rubbish really - we try to make the day special, but she still has to go 364 days between presents!

For the first time, we are having a birthday party (on the 22nd dec- oh, how other parents will love us!) and, as before we won't get dd a big birthday present, but we buy her something 'outdoorsy' in summer- last year it was a slide.

izzybiz · 13/11/2006 12:01

My Ds is 27th Dec.

I have always told people to get 2 presents even if they are 2 small ones.

He will be 14 this year though so i think he can decide now, you know, if there is something he wants and its expensive he will only get the one present.

He wants to have a party in the new year.

nikkie · 13/11/2006 19:59

at twinsets solution!

fizzbuzz · 13/11/2006 20:38

Ds's bday is 17 Dec, and I find whole Christmas period really really stressful. I don't buy joint Xmas and Bday presents, as I think it is unfair. However when ds was younger, in the space of one week we would have a birthday party (+ presents), school xmas party, birthday presents (separate from birthday party presents), and xmas pressies. Ds would be as high as a kite all week, and the house just could not absorb all the pressies. It would take me until about end of Feb to find places to put them all and ds was not really interested in them as he had so many.
Just for the record, my bday end Nov, sisters, brothers and my mums birthday all in Dec. Most years I just want to run away!

KTeepee · 13/11/2006 20:55

Ahem! as someone who shares a birthday with your dd, I agree with everyone who has said you absolutely must NOT do joint Christmas & Birthday presents! Luckily I always had seperate ones as a child (though with hindsight I probably didn't get much for my birthday sometimes - I remember getting ONE Ladybird book for my birthday one year from my parents). I still hate it now if someone (usually my sister) hands me my Christmas present and tells me it is my birthday present as well... would prefer to get two smaller ones.

Birthday parties were not very common when I was little but having one after they go back to school sounds like a good idea, just have a cake and special food for tea on the actual day.

lou33 · 13/11/2006 20:58

i have ds1 turning 8 on the 27th of this month, then xmas, then dd2 is 10 on 29th dec, then i am 40 on 3rd jan

it's always tight but i insist they have separate pressies, as mine were always combined as a kid and it sucked big time

cat64 · 13/11/2006 21:35

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cat64 · 13/11/2006 21:37

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earlysbird · 13/11/2006 21:56

My DTs will be 3 on 14 Dec we will have family party w/e before and not get Christmassy at all until after but will then have a summer party for them and their friends, either 6 months on or on the anniversary of their Christening in July, just to spread it all out a bit. Tbh I'm relieved they were 5 wks early as their due date was dh's birthday in Jan

ComeOVeneer · 13/11/2006 22:00

DS is 19th Dec and DD is 8th Jan. DS is only comingup for 2 so haven'thad the chance to encounter any problems. DD is not a problem as long as we plan it and inform people well in advance before the christmas holidays. I think we will just have to see how it goes with ds as he gets older.

KTeepee · 14/11/2006 07:40

A summer party is also a good idea - one thing I also remember is never getting the opportunity to be given summer toys or clothes because of birthday being so close to Christmas....

Tutter · 14/11/2006 07:43

my birthday is also jan 1st

not sure how you get over it tbh - i've always just thought of it as one of those things

often forgotten by friends/family (sob) - one year even my my mum

if it's any consolation, when she's older she'll prob have really fun nye parties - i did!

Neena28 · 14/11/2006 07:44

My ds and my best friend are both 1st Jan birthdays. Have to say I do think it is a crap time to have a birthday. We just ask around his best mates to find out what day over the new year period they are all free and book it for then. That way if other kids are al away at least he has his most important.

We do very different gifts too, definite christmas then birthday. He also has a small present on his sisters birthday in July so it doesn't seem forever to him.

ernest · 14/11/2006 08:10

I think after Christmas is even worse then just before. My ds is 2nd of January and he always gets forgotten, and by the time people realise, the shops are shut, there's no post and he never gets as many cards, never mind present as his brothers. I keep some of his birthday money behind, and let him buy something in August when it's his brother's birthday, that way there's no jealousy, plus he doesn't have to wait the whole year between pressie, unlike brother who sensibly born near middle of year.

We also do birthday treat (party, shudder) 1st weekend after term starts.

With family, when they ask what dss want for Christmas, I always say now a Christams and birthday present idea, so they don't forget and get it in November so with immediate family he's now ok and not forgotten. At least for him the 1 advantage is the 2nd of January is always a bank holiday here so not only does he not have school, but daddy never has work and can spend the day with him, unlike his brothers

CatBert · 14/11/2006 08:25

My birthday is 26th December. My parents ALWAYS made my birthday an entirely separate occasion and although I sometimes got fed up that I had to wait a whole year for my presents - They always got an extra set of crackers for the table and I ALWAYS got a separate present. Often we all went to the Panto as well.

Personally, I really resented anyone buying be a joint birthday/christmas present. I even got a "birthmas" card once. I didn't appreciate it. But that's kids for you. At 2 - he won't know or care particularly. He will as he gets older!

Although once Christmas day is over - it's lovely to have another celebration to look forward to! There's less of a post-Christmas blues feeling!

fortyplus · 14/11/2006 08:28

ds1 is Dec 27th. Definitely always separate presents. But it does have the advantage that sometimes friends/relations have seen something more expensive than they would usually buy and got him that for his b-d and only a token someyhing for Christmas.
He LOVES having his birthday just after Christmas - he says that for him it means that the excitement isn't over. ds2 is a July baby and we always get ds1 a present on ds2's b-d so he doesn't have to wait a whole year. (ds2 gets one on ds1's b-d as well)
As for parties - it's varied a bit over the years but usually in the week between Xmas & New Year - everyone is looking for things to do then, anyhow, so other parents have been very grateful! We go out for a 'treat' as a family on the actual day - maybe a meal, London Eye, Theatre or whatever. When he was little it was just family round for tea & cake.

calebsmummy · 14/11/2006 09:00

My two youngest Ds' share a birthday on the 17th of December when they will be 4 and 2. I don't do joint xmas/birthday pressies as I don't feel it's fair, but this year I am not opposed to them having joint birthday presents as DS3 is playing with DS2 toys anyway and I can't see the point in buying him younger stuff now. I don't do joint birthday pressies but don't mind others doing it.

Added to that, DH has his birhday on 1st Jan and DS1 on the 11th. I always wanted to compensate for DS1 haiving his just after christmas as people were more likely to forget. Now I find that most people just tend to do their birthday/xmas shopping all in one go. We must be a nightmare for our family and friends! (Well I'm not, mine is May)

fortyplus · 14/11/2006 09:07

How about this lot...
Niece 30/11
My mum 1/12
ds1's best friend 1/12
MIL 13/12
SIL 26/12
Best friend's child 26/12
ds1 27/12

Must be a lot of people doing the business at the same time as the mad March hares!

maveta · 14/11/2006 09:41

Hi, I'm sorry I haven't had time to read all of the replies so I don't know if I am repeating anything that has already been said. Apologies if so.
My birthday is a few days before Christmas and it has NEVER been an issue in our house. When I was young my parents offered me the option of having a party in summer to celebrate my birthday if I preferred but I never wanted to do that.
The main concession made was that my Mum never put the tree up until after my birthday but we did put other decorations up. I always felt it made my birthday more special that the house looked so pretty.
I never never NEVER received joint christmas and birthday presents and the one time in my life I did, from a then boyfriend, I was mortally offended. Why should I get less just because the two occasions are close together?! If anything I think normally I did pretty well out of it because my parents tended to overcompensate!