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Christmas

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Original poster

What would you do for Christmas in my position?

13 replies

Smurfgirl · 08/11/2006 20:24

We have no kids BTW are both 22 and have always spend Christmas separately with our parents - first year we will be together.

Ok. We live 2 hours from my parents who we are planning to spend Christmas with, only DP is working Christmas Eve and probably Boxing Day morning (works in retail) and we have no car. So we are relying on trains etc.

So we are a bit stuck, I am my parents only child and I know they will be upset if we cannot spend the day with them. My parents can't come here because my Grandad will be there and he is not v.flexible.

DP is trying v.hard to get some days off after Christmas but his bosses are not keen, he has explained the situation but we are not hopeful...

I had originally planned to go home on 20th Dec and then DP would join me but tbh I am wondering if it is worth it if we just have to be back here for Boxing day.

We have a set of friends we could spend Christmas with this year...

So what would you do? Reading it it sounds silly but I know my mum will be dead upset if we can't come and I really want to go but the logistics don't look good.

OP posts:
Rhubarb · 08/11/2006 20:29

Explain it to her and perhaps spend New Year with her? Sure she'll be a bit upset, but you can't make everything go right, especially not at Christmas, there has to be a bit of give and take and a bit of understanding. I think if more people were willing to compromise then everyone would have wonderful Christmasses! But as it is, everyone seems to feel that Christmas belongs to them and people should do what they want to do!

Not saying this is the case with you, but be honest with your mum and arrange something else.
There will be other Christmasses!

Original poster
Smurfgirl · 08/11/2006 20:32

They have new year plans as do we so its a no go but I have suggested that. And I will be a qualified nurse in 2 years so will probably be working Christmas and so definately have to stay at home.

My mum sounded like she was going to cry when I talked to her about it on the phone. Eeks.

God I wish we had a car.

Sensible advice though Rubarb I keep repeating that its just Christmas!!

OP posts:
themildmanneredjanitor · 08/11/2006 20:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Rhubarb · 08/11/2006 20:36

First Christmas by themselves.

Well, for our first Christmas I had to spend at my sister's, being kept awake all night by her new baby who screamed and screamed. Then to my mums for civilities and sausages on sticks. I called him up in desperation on Christmas Day and begged him to come and get me!

Original poster
Smurfgirl · 08/11/2006 20:41

Last Christmas we spent apart and this one is the first one we will betogether we got engaged in May and I know maybe thats a bit silly but i want to be with him for it

[cheesy emoticon]

OP posts:
Rhubarb · 08/11/2006 20:43

Then be with him! Your mum will understand!

Could you not spend the day before Christmas eve with her, and go back on Christmas eve to spend Christmas Day with your bf?

BudaBeast · 08/11/2006 20:47

Before we married/moved overseas we had separate Xmases. I wouldn't miss Xmas with my family and he wanted Xmas with his Dad.

We would then meet up a few days after Xmas and have our own Xmas day - pressies, champagne, nookie, Xmas dinner etc etc.

New Year with whoever we wanted - together.

Original poster
Smurfgirl · 08/11/2006 20:47

Was just thinking go to parents until Christmas Eve - maybe do special lunch on Christmas Eve with them, then come home and spend Christmas Day with my boyfriend and my friends. Hmm. Sounds good and DP does not have to rush around.
Do you think that sounds good for my mum?

OP posts:
dmo · 08/11/2006 20:48

i have been with my dh 12 yrs we now have 2 boys but the rule for christmas day is
we have no visiters and we visit nobody
this is only one day and b4 children we worked really hard so it was nice to spend a whole day together, now we have children it is lovely to spend the day as a family

mil is miffed this year already asked if she can bob down on christmas day (her youngest moved out in feb so its just mil and fil at home alone) already said no

Rhubarb · 08/11/2006 20:48

Yup, sounds fine. If I were your mum I'd be touched that you were making an effort to spend time with me over Christmas, and it's real time too, not just a couple of hours before you rush off, but 2 days and a night! I'd be dead chuffed!

LoveMyGirls · 08/11/2006 20:57

i would spend it with my dp, you got engaged and so you should be treated like a couple and as you will be working most christmases i think you should spend this one with your friedns and next yr (which will be your last one?)you should make sure he books time off and both go to your parents.

firemaiden · 08/11/2006 21:05

My memory of trying to get public transport around Christmas day is that it is a complete nightmare. You don't want to ruin your Christmas by spending most of it on train stations and once you are qualified, as you say, Christmas may not be flexible. Your compromise sounds really sensible (provided there are trains on Xmas Eve!).

ja9 · 08/11/2006 21:08

could you hire a car for a few days?

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