Best Xmas memory and worst Xmas memory...

[Primadonnagirl]

Best...I loved Christmas and as a kid the best part was when all the family had arrived safely and I knew nothing could spoil the day..
Worst...Dad making Mum cry in front of everyone and she was gently sobbing as she passed the biscuits round..we all took one not knowing what to say.So ashamed of that even 20 years later

I'm glad I started this thread..not to be maudlin but to remind us all that the best Christmases can be made of simple things and that everyone goes through " worst times" but you can get through it. Don't want to sound like a Tiny Tim but Christmas is both wonderful and hard for me so I really appreciate you sharing your stories .

I'm finding this christmas pretty depressing. Was hopeful this time last year id be pregnant but several rounds of treatment later and nope, still not pregnant this christmas. Another year and nothing's changed.

Worst waa 2 years ago. My final round of fertility treatment had failed and I was severely depressed (DDidnt realise at the time) and then two days before Christmas got winter vom bug.
Best Christmas is hopefully this year with our beautiful ds. But last year was wonderful too when we saw a photo of him for the first time on Christmas Eve.

I'm so sorry Forty

Best was 3 years ago when we were in the Alps with PIL's and my Dad and our ds's. A proper, snowy Christmas. Santa visited the village on Christmas Eve. We all skied and had lots of fun and someone else did the cooking.

Worst was when I was 19. I knew mum was ill, nobody had told me how ill. She cooked Christmas lunch for the whole (extended) family and went straight to bed afterwards. She died 2 days later.

She would have loved our snowy Christmas.

Xmas - sorry about your mum and everybody else who has lost loved ones

My worst christmas was last year when I killed our christmas tree then got appendicitis and had surgery on Christmas Day, missing dd's first christmas . Nobody was there when I woke up from surgery I'll never let dh live that one down .

Thankfully I can't remember any bad christmas' apart from that , maybe just a few boring ones . Most have been lovely and hopefully it will continue this year with new ds

Oh my god islandmama are you Kate Middelton?

Best - 2006 bring newborn Ds (dc1) home from hospital Christmas Day evening and all the twinkly lights being on and then fireworks going off as we drove along the motorway.

Worst - 2001 When my gran died on Xmas day.

Actually worst would be a tie with Ds (4) being diagnosed with pneumonia on Xmas day

Best - hard to pick out one as most were good, or had lots of good bits. But 2005 was the year that Christmas Day was my EDD, I refused to travel "down home" (250 miles) and we stayed at our home. But as I was SO heavily PG, we were able to go to my GPs house for dinner (we always feel that any time we DO stay up, we ought to cook for ourselves just as our core family of 2 and now 3). We always visit my GPs house, even now that they are gone and it's my DAunt's house - she hosts Christmas for her siblings, and there is a big gathering of various relatives and friends throughout the day dropping in for drinks/nibbles. But that year, we went to church in the morning, walked the pier (well, I got 2/3 of the way waddling), visited my other DGM in my other DAunt's house, and then we went to my DGPs house in late afternoon. Where DD had dropped enough to allow me to enjoy 2 helpings of turkey, 2 of pudding, and 2 small glasses of wine. There were 14 there that day (DGPs, 5 of their 6 DCs and the 3 relevant DSpouses, and 3 DGC's (me, a 4 year old and a 5 month old - our respective parents were the eldest and youngest) as well as DH). It was a lovely relaxed welcoming evening, with lots of laughter. I knew before I left that their DGGC was on the way (things started as we left dinner table to open presents but I had to stick it out for another 2 hours) but it was a lovely surprise to them all waking up the next day - I was trying to keep quiet sitting between the other new(ish) mum and the priest!! The mat hosp was lovely and quiet that evening so I was able to stay in the shower for hours, and DD arrived at 6am. By the time that the "family" dinner back in that house in the early new year (when my DF and his family came up to our city - for dinner at his parents house), it was sooo lovely to be home, and to get photos of DGM holding DCousin (5 months) and DGF holding DD (just days) - that is a really special photo showing the bridging of the generations and there's a whole family one showing 4 generations together.

Worst - last year, I found it quite hard. It was the first without any of my DGPs - they died in 2010, 2012 and 2013. All had great lives, and I was very involved with them throughout my own. There was a lot going on and I was running too much. But I didn't have a chance for much needed quiet time and processing time. We have had a few years of rows in my family - but I have learned enough by now to see them coming and get out of the way.

My worst Christmas would be the year my grandma died Christmas morning, we lived with her so I was taken away from my mum and dad for the day to stay with my aunt and cousin.
My best Christmas was 5 years ago when me and dh moved in and as my parents went away we spent the whole day doing whatever we wanted with no one elks to think about. I hope this year will be good as dd is just turning 4 and more excited than she's ever been but dh is working 12 hour shifts every day through her holidays apart from Christmas Day and the following Monday so we don't get much time with him at all :-(

All my childhood Christmases were great; lots of special food (we only had turkey at Christmas so it was a big deal, great film on telly, all the extended family getting together. In bed trying to get to sleep waiting for Father Christmas to come, writing letter to Father christmas and sending it up the chimney, going carol singing, school Christmas fayre, all that kid stuff).

Worst: a few years ago when I suspected my partner was having an affair. He was a sullen pig to me all day, his two kids were over, my grown up son, pig spent whole Christmas dinner completely ignoring all of us and texting continually back and forth to someone (her, I guess) while I tried to slap a smile on and pretend everything was normal, ran around doing decorations, presents, shopping, dinner etc by myself, for the sake of the kids. He was having an affair. Now my ex.

Best - I think it must be when I was little and still believed in Father Christmas: the years when waking up early on Christmas morning there was that moment of lovely excitement feeling the weight of the stocking on the bed and knowing that Father Christmas had been...

Worst: I was heavily pg and spent most of Christmas Day on an acute cancer ward with a friend who was undergoing aggressive chemo - it was not certain at that point whether she would survive (she did though!) and it was a very depressing day surrounded by the elderly ladies on the ward, one of whom had terrible flatulence and a potty-mouthed husband who kept insulting the (lovely) nurses, and another of whom had a series of relatives who came in and set up an electronic Hammond organ and played favourite Christmas tunes for literally HOURS without a break - my poor friend was going crazy listening to "Frosty the Snowman" on this electronic horror for the twentieth time. The pay-TV conpany the hospital used made a big thing about how they were giving patients free TV for Christmas (it was otherwise stupidly expensive), bug then it turned out that the free TV was only between 1:30 and 3:30pm on Christmas Day (stingy bastards).
Then a young on-call doctor with no bedside manner came round and told her she would have to have a bronchial wash (nasty procedure she had been dreading) and she was distraught. Overall a grim day and far far worse than the one Christmas I spent in bed delirious with very bad flu - at least I knew at the time that I'd get better from the flu...!

Best - possibly the first christmas DH and I spent together. We tiled the kitchen, ate baked potatoes and a Sara Lee gateaux, and it was just so carefree and cosy together.

Worst - the first year mums dementia had really kicked in, and she had wrapped random rubbish up for us all. I sobbed and sobbed later, not because of the presents, but for the loss of the person who used to spend so much time finding exactly the thing I would love, and who'd looked forward to buying things for a grandchild for so long.

Ah, CMOT - that's hard :( My gran had always given us terrible presents but deliberately terrible IYSWIM (charity shop purchases, wartime spirit!), but the year she gave us all random wrapped things that made no sense was the year we really realised that her dementia had really taken over. Very sad :(

This year should be brilliant with our beautiful 3 month old DD, last year I had had my fourth miscarriage of the year on 10th December. In 2007 we lost my Dad on the November after a short illness so that wasn't great but within 2 years we had my niece in the family and she rejuvenated us all.

But even the sad years it's been good to be with family and sharing the worst and best times.

The worst christmas I've had was when I was 12. We were at my aunts ( dads sister)house for the day, and my dad picked that moment to announce to the extended family they were divorcing as my mum had had an affair. My siblings and I already knew, but while no one else did it was nice to pretend iykwim? My aunt lives in the middle of nowhere so mum was stuck there all day with a horrible atmosphere and no one taking to her.

The best ever was a few years ago. After spending previous years with DHs family, they had decided to go away so we had our first Xmas at home. Us and our 2 DC spent all day playing board games and eating and watching telly. It was a fab day.

Best Christmas - ds2 a week old. Ds1 SO excited Christmas morning and his delight and amazement at getting a stocking full of toys just for him.

Worst - My youngest brother coming in very late on Christmas Eve and throwing up everywhere and over everything including his bed. Trying to help by helping clear it up, putting on washloads /drying /ironing it whilst my mum was in floods of tears and my father shouted. Then all my brothers massively hung over on Christmas Day and my father silent with angry outbursts all day about it with my mum still massively disappointed in how the day had turned out / non-appearance of my brothers etc..... Though the year my father gave my mum only the few things he'd managed to get at the petrol station - think de-icer and a bottle of washing up liquid - late Christmas Eve and watching her trying to hold back her tears and put a brave face on it is pretty close. (I took over his role after that.) Don't think ghost of childhood Christmases will ever leave me tbh.

I can't see christmas this year being great. My lack of pregnancy makes me unwilling to bother with the whole thing to be honest.

Best was the first Christmas with the DCs but without the ex. It was so chilled with no drama. I loved it.

Worst was age 5. My DBro (then 7) declared in front of me and my mother that he did not think Santa existed. My mother was ecstatic that he'd worked it out so young and made a huge fuss of him. I was utterly heartbroken that something so nice wasn't real. She told me off for being a crybaby.

Worst: it's a toss up between the first Christmas after my mum's suicide and the last Christmas I spent with my terminally ill brother.

Best: a toss up between last year, our second Christmas day at home just the four of us - small DC so excited, DH and I so relaxed, lots of good food, playing and chilling out together - and the one when I was about 8, with my (happily divorced, best of friends) mum and dad, my darling brother, my nan and her husband and dog, laughing together and playing Trivial Pursuits and just being happy together.

But on reflection, I think last year's was the best. I am so lucky and so thankful every day for what I have. I cherish every moment.

Best-I must have been 5/6 years old, and I came home from school to see that DM had decorated everything with those foil ceiling decorations. Completely covered. I spent hours laying there watching them and then having Christmas at home as we normally visited family.

Worst- My DGM died on the 27th Dec. We had Christmas with her but she was in a foul mood. No one knew she was dying but she wanted to get through Christmas and get home.

I was a young teenager and she died in front of me. I had to do CPR and call an ambulance. Horrible time for us and I had a break down. I hated Christmas from there on until I had DC and I realise DGM was doing her best, even to the last moment.

Best: DS1 just 2 weeks old, at home just DH, DS and I. Stayed at home, cooked a lovely meal, relaxed and it even snowed in the evening.

Worst: fast fwd 8 years and DH (now ex) had just announced that he had 'feelings' (read lust) for somebody I thought was a friend. We went to the PIL as planned. The elephant in the room was enormous! My mood was not helped by cheesecake for dessert (Xmas pud having been declared 'too heavy'), one tube of Pringles, one little box of Celebrations chocolates for 4 adults and 2 children.

Best Christmas -any with my family or the one year when it was DH, me and my best friend. My best friend was supposed to be going to see her family but due to mental health issues couldn't face it so had taken a overdose. She rang me from the hospital to ask me to collect her and she stayed for dinner and then the night. It had also been snowing in the days before Christmas so we went to the local park for a walk in the snow.
This year will be great - DS is 3 and so excited which is making me excited.

Worst - we went to PIL, not on Christmas day but around Christmas and MIL moaned the whole time. Then one evening she asked us advice on what to do about her elderly dad who had dementia and we gently suggested that if she and her siblings were struggling with his care it may be best for him to go into a home. This was met with basically a tantrum and her saying all sorts of nasty things to me about my family (she had past form for this but we were trying to sort things out). We decided to leave but as it was late stayed the extra night so in the morning we ended up with another huge argument. We didn't get to meet any of the friends we had planned to meet as we had nowhere else to stay. DH was really upset and we haven't been to their house since.