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Christmas

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Should I make DH cook on Boxing Day?

13 replies

Inthedarkaboutfashion · 10/11/2014 12:08

I'm posting here as I am not brave enough for AIBU and my thread is Christmas related.
Every year we have lots of family over at our house on Boxing Day and every year I do all of the cooking despite DH promises to share the cooking. This year none of my family are coming for Boxing Day but we have 5 members of DH family coming. I am seriously tempted to tell him that he is doing Boxing Day dinner this year because I have done every year for the past decade and it his his turn. My DC would prefer me to cook as DH is not the best in the kitchen but frankly I think it is time that I put my feet up on Boxing Day and left him to it.
Should I make him do the meal planning and cooking for Boxing Day or would that be excessively mean (on the guests as well as DC and DH).
I will be cooking on Christmas Day BTW.

OP posts:
EverythingsRunningAway · 10/11/2014 12:14

Of course it's not unreasonable.

What you are proposing sounds totally fine.

madsadbad · 10/11/2014 12:17

Not unreasonable, practice makes perfect so he can get in the kitchen prior and have a few test runs.
For our Christmas though my Mum wants my husband over there even if I was not going, as he is a great host and she can rest assured all are ok when she's on the cookathon.

TheCowThatLaughs · 10/11/2014 12:19

He obviously needs practice. Does he cook at any other time? If not he could start making dinner a few times a week and everyone benefits

Inthedarkaboutfashion · 10/11/2014 12:26

He rarely cooks at other times. It's my own fault in the main as I have allowed him to do next to no cooking but it is partly due to the fact that I am a SAHM and he works long hours so the kids can't want until he gets home and starts faffing in the kitchen.
It's also partly due to one of our DC being on a restrictive diet due to having several food based allergies and DH is clueless about this and has to ask me about every tiny thing and I worry that he isn't conscientious enough to avoid cross contamination. However, if he cooked more often he would probably get used to this and it would be less of an issue.
Looks like he is cooking on Boxing Day and I am putting my feet up. If he doesn't like my proposal I suppose he will just have to uninvite his family as I am not spending another year cooking by myself for the five thousand some of who I don't actually like

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DillydollyRIP · 10/11/2014 12:29

It's sounds fair if he shares the cooking load over christmas. He's got time to practice in the meantime.

If your inlaws are anything like mine, your dh will get all the praise when he hasn't lifted a finger anyway so might as well get him to actually do it.

Inthedarkaboutfashion · 10/11/2014 16:13

Spanner in the works. My mum is now considering coming to me on Boxing Day and I'm not sure I can subject her to DH cooking, different than just having the in laws. Wink

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TheCowThatLaughs · 10/11/2014 16:39

But with all the practice he'll get between now and then, surely it won't be a problem Wink. How bad is his cooking??

Leeds2 · 10/11/2014 17:34

I think it would be a bit unreasonable if you just tell him he is cooking on Boxing Day, and leave him to it, because he will in all probability do nothing! He needs to start practising now. In a couple of weeks, I would get him to draw up a list and, tbh, I would buy the stuff on it for him if I was a SAHM and he was at work. That would be my contribution!

On a separate note, he needs to learn about your son's allergies as a matter of urgency. If you were away from home in an emergency, he would have to cope and it is better that he is prepared.

Inthedarkaboutfashion · 10/11/2014 18:38

He knows what to do in case of an allergic reaction and he knows that some foods are safe, the ones in free from packets. He also knows that there is a stack of allergy free meals in the freezer that I have pre cooked and frozen in individual meal sized portions.
He will have the time to plan and shop himself for Boxing Day as he doesn't work for two weeks at Christmas.
I do feel mean but after more than a decade of me cooking at Christmas and not getting the promised help I think I have to stop being a pushover.

OP posts:
gymboywalton · 10/11/2014 18:42

Why are you cooking at all on boxing day? Surely boxing day is cold turkey, Gannon, cheese, pickles, etc etc ?

gymboywalton · 10/11/2014 18:43

Gammon even

Inthedarkaboutfashion · 10/11/2014 19:00

Because we usually have lots of family over on Boxing Day and both mine and DH family are not British and expect a cooked meal. We have never done cold buffet style meal and it isn't something we would want to do. If we did a buffet it would be hot dishes and people helping themselves, but still lots of cooking involved.

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rookiemater · 10/11/2014 19:03

Go for it. I have passed responsibility for Christmas Day over to DH when a) I realised that for once I am the one working right up to Christmas Eve b) it's his family coming and c) he started to complain about the cost when I got out the M&S Christmas food brochure. So I am leaving it to him and will see what will happen. I'm sure it will be fine Grin.

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