Would you buy a 12 year old a doll?

[Toastandstrawberryjam]

Middle DD is 12 but still quite a young 12, she likes her iPad and phone and make up but also playing with her sylvanian families with her little sister and was heartbroken when her dad tidied out all her baby dolls a few months ago.

Youngest DD has a v expensive doll that she got when she was 3, it is an absolutely beautiful rag doll type. Handmade in Canada and I still cringe at the cost of it (and the customs charge I got slammed with!). Middle DD has always coveted it, it's very much the type that could look lovely on a much older girls bed still and be kept forever. Am I crazy to consider buying her one, is it a babyish gift to buy for an almost teenage girl?

I'm not a doll fan but they are lovely so pricey though! If I could afford them I would be seriously tempted!
Fwiw I have a nearly 14 year old boy who still has his babyhood teddy in his room on full display - battered and a bit bruised (from his WWE phase) but he has his mates round all the time and it is never hidden.

Try Rubens Barn dolls - not dissimilar, and considerably cheaper.
And get her a doll. Your mean dh.

I would be concerned that it might spoil Christmas for all of you as well and make DD feel guilty about that. If her Dad has convinced her she's too old for dolls and hers are 'hidden' in her wardrobe, how is an expensive doll like this going to go down with him? Either way, DD is bound to feel upset that she can't play with her dolls or that she's got a present her Dad thinks is for babies, so even if she does like it (which I'm not sure she will anyway) then isn't it just going to open a can of worms?...

Tsk to your dh. Really!

She's definitely not too old for a doll.

I know of the Bamboletta dolls. They're quite waldorf-y aren't they. Nice dolls. Used to be difficult to get hold of, had to buy quick when a new batch was put on sale.

My nearly 11yo has asked for Barbie stuff for christmas. I initially thought she was too old but it is what she wants so I am indulging her.

I think you should talk to dd and see if she would like one of those type of dolls all of her own like her sister has. Your DH is an arse. They grow up so fast, making her feel crap about wanting to play with dolls is very unkind.

I think you need to ask her. I also think that giving up dolls is always a bittersweet moment but it has to come at some point. I'm all for preserving innocence but you can't do that forever.

My 13 year old still sleeps with her Baby Annabelle, she'd hate her friends to know, and I don't think she'd be interested in a new doll.

It is a funny age, DD sweeps down the stairs, all 5ft 10 of her, looking amazing and off to a party, then a few hours later she's tucked up asleep with Baby Annabelle looking about 7 again.

DD1 is 12 and is currently surgically attached to an old rag doll of mine that she has carefully "refurbished" by giving her new hair and making her a dress. She has taken the doll out and about with her. Her friends seem remarkably understanding. It hasn't gone to school yet, thankfully ...

What you're talking about sounds quite different from the baby dolls. If you're sure she'll like it, go ahead. If not sure, drop some hints and see what she says.

My 13 year old tough rugby playing ds has just come out to get a drink clutching Bronte the dinosaur and losh, the very, very tattered remains of a blue silk scarf he stole from my mother and refused to give back at the age of 9 months..........

I can't really see the specialness if the dolls? They look like cabbage patch dolls and really babyish.
I wouldn't get her one actually, the move has been made away from dolls and so she will be thinking of them as something adults don't want her to have.
I'd go with something else.

I also think that giving up dolls is always a bittersweet moment but it has to come at some point. I'm all for preserving innocence but you can't do that forever

A child doesn't have to 'give up dolls', normally they just have a smaller and smaller role in your life as you grow up.... it happens naturally, not when you arse of a father decides that at 11 you are 'too old' for them and makes you feel so bad about it that you are scared to play with them/take them to bed :(

What does preserving innocence have to do with dolls?

I just looked at their site - would think of getting one for DD if they weren't so expensive! But you said it would be one of the smaller ones, not the big ones - so why not, it would be a lovely ornament in her room and much more appropriate for an older girl. I'd get it!

I agree with Chipping!

Also, the Bamboletta (as I mentioned earlier) are basically Waldorf dolls, as you're probably aware. You can buy those good quality, easily, and a little cheaper, and in the UK (if that's easier).

E.g. www.waldorfdollshop.co.uk/

I really think you need to ask her. I remember being absolutely gutted one Christmas at what was probably that sort of she when my mum bought me "one last doll" when I had COMPLETELY grown out of the whole thing. It was a main present so kind if blew Xmas for me, I still remember the feeling of crashing disappointment to this day! So what I'm saying is ask a few questions and test the waters before you buy and make sure it's for her and not for you!

Well said Chipping.

What else is your DH going to decide it is time for her to give up or begin? She is only 12.

ps. I am not sure I'd get one if you're unsure OP. I'd be more likely to tell her Daddy has been very silly and encourage to get some of her existing dolls down and do things in her own time. Them staying up there at his suggestion, and you getting a new one, seems like mixed messages. It is also a lot of money when she probably won't play with it much as a teenager, even though she may still keep the dolls she has an attachment to.

Well I wasn't sure again yesterday when the new batch were released on the site and they are all sold now so I have another week to think about it!