DH took DD1 for a hair cut and now she has a mullet! Pls cheer me up

[FrauHolle]

can't enjoy this Xmas, my H has taken my eldest to accompany him for his hair cut then they come back and he's had her haiuncut, too. She has super fine hair and now there's nothing left of her lovely curls, they trimmed it down sideways and it's frizzy and uneven! I broke out in tears and had a go at him and he screamed at me he pays for everything in this house and hence makes the decisions.

He is always at my eldest to do her hair up or cut her fringe but I have always said no and he knows that.

Yes I know it will grow back but that's not the point. He went against my will and he squared up to me and screamed how only his wishes count and not mine.

I have sat stoney faced throughout last night's dinner and am in bed now with my iPad. I am so so livid he treats me like this!!

Is there anything you can say to cheer me up? I have not unwrapped my presents, I don't want anything! The girls got way to much and are fighting downstairs. From the presents to the food he always does what HE wants, nobody else's view matters.

so it's not really about the haircut is it? you're right. it will grow back

it's christmas, nail on a smile and spend time with your family and be grateful for what you do have.

that said, it's unreasonable that he thinks that he holds the purse-strings so makes all the decisions, but there is a better time to have that conversation.

I'm sorry you're having a rubbish morning Frau

If I were you I'd repost in relationships. I'll look out for you over there.

Fwiw I would have cried too. I agree that you should make a pretence on Christmas day for the girls sake but I know that's hard.

I hope your day gets better

You are right, there is a better time to have this discussion. I have just managed to get dressed and play with the girls and for their sake I am trying my best to make it a nice Xmas.

I will pour myself a glass of champers and ignore his selfishness.

Enjoy your champagne and have a lovely day with your DDs.

Hope your day was better, frau. Merry Xmas. :)

Your husband squared up to you, screamed in your face and told you that as he makes the money he makes the decisions and people are saying put a brave face on for Christmas?!

I'd be fucking furious in your position and Christmas or not, I'd be having it out with him and not taking shit - this doesn't sound like its just about a hair cut.

How old is DD and what does she think of her hair, or is she too little to notice she's got a mullet?

And definitely repost in relationships if you've not done so already

Sorry, you're right that is awful. I didn't mean forgive your DH or pretend with him. I meant have a nice time with your DDs and keep any argument away from them.

I hope your day improved Frau, sorry if I seemed not to validate your feelings - you were right to be upset x

The shouting about making the decisions as he earns the money is the worrying part. Bring your DD to a ladies hairdressers to see if they can improve the cut. That way your DH gets to pay for the haircut twice, and the message gets through.

What age is your DD? What does she think of her hair.

There is obviously much more to this than just the haircut. Hope that your day went ok - it's rotten having to feel enforced enjoyment when you are so upset.

Every child has to have a crappy haircut at some point in their child hood. Take lots of photos so you can look back and laugh in ten years time.

You are her mother. That give you the ultimate decision over how she has her hair. It is an unwritten law.

"he pays for everything in this house and hence makes the decisions." this is the bit that needs addressing.