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Christmas

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Unwelcome Christmas guests

40 replies

fluffytowels · 24/12/2011 00:19

I'm gearing myself up for Christmas Day and don't know what to do. You can decide.

We are having lunch by ourselves then my siblings and family are coming for tea. My parents have died so it's just us.

My Dad's sister and her husband always used to visit my parents on Christmas Day.

So last year, they just turned up at our house. Shock. In previous years they had gone to my sister's but they turned up at her house and she wasn't in so they realised she must be at mine.

They only live a few miles away but I never see them. They haven't sent a Christmas card, have never sent me a birthday card or DC's. They didn't bring so much as a bottle of wine but settled in for the evening.

There has been no opportunity for me to tell them not to come as I haven't seen them since about August (at my sister's).

I'm all for Christmas spirit but it's Christmas Day FFS and feel taken advantage of.

My sister says it would be mean to not let them come and I'm not entirely sure how I stop them.

Thoughts please.

OP posts:
fluffytowels · 24/12/2011 10:54

They'll turn up about 8pm and then expect to help themselves to ham, pork pie etc.

OP posts:
CrotchFlakes · 24/12/2011 19:44

Only if you let them in!!!

SantasENormaSnob · 24/12/2011 20:05

I wouldn't answer the door tbh.

Very rude to turn up unannounced and uninvited on christmas day.

PigletJohn · 24/12/2011 20:29

go out for a long walk

hide the ham, turkey sandwiches and mince pies, and say you had a late lunch and will be going out for supplies in the morning.

shodatin · 24/12/2011 21:29

I wouldn't have them in the house again, as obviously not amenable to hints, but think you need to sort out your sister so she's not encouraging them or on their side, like insisting she does the catering at her house from now on.
Very best wishes.

MerylStrop · 24/12/2011 21:37

Well, yeah it is cheeky
But I think in the spirit of the season I'd make them welcome, invited or not. If you're doing food for a bunch of people, two more isn't much.

Maybe you should be working on your relationship with them a bit?

Binfullofgibletsonthe26th · 24/12/2011 21:41

I would answer the door, but not invite them in tbh...could you have a cheap bottle of plonk with some tinsel round it ready in the hallway, hand it to them, say Merry Christmas thanks for stopping by but we don't want to keep you from seeing your grandkids and then close the door.

Appuskidu · 24/12/2011 21:45

Why doesn't your sister host the 'sort of Christmas' she would like at her own house, then??!

I think they sound incredibly rude! Did your parents actually invite them every Christmas day or have they turned up uninvited (without anyone actually telling them they weren't welcome) for twenty years??

toutlemonde · 24/12/2011 23:16

So they turn up at 8 in the evening, not for your Christmas dinner or all day or anything like that? Sounds like they are just visiting family on Christmas day like lots of people do, but that they're being a bit shit by coming empty handed. Can't you eat tea a little early, say 7pm and then just offer them a glass of wine and a mince pie when they turn up? They are your family , pretty cheeky of you too if you turn them away from your door on christmas day...

AllGoodNamesGone · 25/12/2011 00:35

I agree that turning up at 8pm isn't that bad, especially is it was always tradition to visit your parents. I thought you meant they appeared just as you were dishing out dinner and expected to pull up a chair!

Very rude to not bring anything, though, not even a selection box for the children! I'd be inclined to hide all the food away and just offer them a brew, then all start getting into pyjamas and yawning at 9, tired after getting up early with the children and all that!

shodatin · 25/12/2011 10:11

Hope you';ve now decided on plan of action and are able to relax without feeling resentful and apprehensive all day - best wishes, and hope this isn't a problem for next year.

fluffytowels · 25/12/2011 11:59

Right, I have invited them. Told them what to bring.

DH had quite well deserved rant at me for letting it bother my Christmas. Invitation removes the rudeness of turning up uninvited. Job done (I think).

Thank you all.

OP posts:
3duracellbunnies · 25/12/2011 12:43

Well done, it's only a few hours a year, can put it down as your good deed, and hopefully they will bring something so not so rude. You will probably relax and enjoy it more knowing that they have contributed, also sets the precident for another time. Happy Christmas.

BastedTurkey · 25/12/2011 21:30

Well done, you're a better person than me

3duracellbunnies · 26/12/2011 07:54

So, did they come, did they bring something? How was it?

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