Just the 4 of us this Christmas - how do I make it a special day?

[NoseyNooNoo]

It just me, DH and 2 DCs this year at home for Christmas. Normally we have some family over so it will feel very quiet / just like any other Sunday.

Any ideas for making it a special day for just the 4 of us?

Also, DH's mum died in January so any tips on how to handle that would be great.

Same here, so watching with interest.

Hi, I don't normally post on here, more of a lurker, but thought I would chip in. We always have Christmas just the four of us and it is lovely. You can wear pyjamas for as long as you like, eat what you like and get to spend quality time with each other without worrying about anyone else. I should say, I am normally a very sociable person but love it on Christmas Day when it is just us :o We have kind of evolved our own traditions over the last few years, like making our own crackers and everyone choosing their own breakfast. Some friends of ours always go for a huge walk in the afternoon and I know other people who always have a new board game to play. Our first Christmas without my Mum was difficult so you have my sympathy Nosey. I think the best thing to do is to accept that it will not be the same without them and don't expect to be able to carry on as normal. I lit a candle for my DM and still do, several years on. Anyway, I am rambling on now. Good luck! (Oh and go out on Boxing Day so you don't go stir crazy!)

We've just had the 5 of us for the last few years. Here are my top tips:

1. Christmas Eve dinner is a carpet picnic of party type food, or pizza & garlic bread, or anything pretty easy. We do the whole Christmas pyjamas thing and always a new DVD of something we can all watch together.

1. First thing in the morning the children open their Christmas stockings in our bed. Then downstairs for posh treat-y breakfast (or pork pie for breakfast if you're an exiled Midlander like my DH)

1. Are you church-goers? Either habitually or just-for-Christmas? We do go to church anyway, but I like a Christmas morning service because it gives some structure and a sense of occasion. If you do this, would you have the opportunity to light a candle in the church for your MIL, or anything like that?

1. Back home, drink & mince pies / slice of Christmas cake round the tree while we open presents.

1. Then I cook the dinner but it's a very freeflow, dinner-will-happen-when-it-happens approach. Usually end up eating about 2ish. Lots of crackers and Christmas music on.

1. If it's still light, or weather's OK, might go out for a bit of a walk / ride on new bikes or whatever. Or in previous years, when we've finished eating and it's been dark, we've had some fireworks. Or actually last year we had indoor sparklers and DS1 burnt a hole in the kitchen floor.

1. Children go to bed reasonably early (having had very early start). We then have cheese & biscuits and liqueur in peace, and we usually save one of our presents for each other until this point too.

I guess a lot of it depends on how old your DC are - and I know lots of people having a small Christmas at home prefer to spend the whole day in pyjamas playing on the Wii and eating Chinese, at least the beauty of it is you can do absolutely whatever you like.

I love Xmas just us 4
We have lazy morning drinking bucks fizz, eating what we like, taking ages to open presents, watch Xmas telly, this year we're eating at 5pm so we cam help dcs with their presents ( ds is getting HP Lego which will take ages to build)

This will be our first year just us too and I love xmas being a social occasion so was very put out that MIL is going away!

So we will be going to see Santa at his grotto on xmas eve followed by a film on the sofa. Presents on xmas morning then lunch at middayish - we are just going to eat whatever we like rather than doing the big roast thing.

At 2ish we will drive down to my parents hotel (they are very busy working on xmas day and we can't stay there as they are always full) to see them for a bit and have a little social in the evening.

I just felt like seeing noone on xmas day feels like any other weekend day and it wouldn't be xmassy at all to me.

Can you go and see friends in the evening?

This year will be just the 3 of us and I can't wait. In 10 years of being me and DH and 3 of having DS we have never been just the 3 of us.

Champagne, bacon and eggs awaits us for breakfast. Present opening, walk with the dog, lunch (when it is ready!). Rubbish TV, lots of chocolate.

We also do pjs and a new dvd on christmas eve but I am not sure which movie yet!

I really can't wait!

We are on our own this christmas (me, DP and DD). I'm really looking forward to it. My current plan to make the day special is that I have done a treasure hunt for DP (DD is too little and DP is a big kid who will love it). I have taken close up photos of places around the house so he will have to work out what the photo is of and then find the present. I have bulked up the presents I'm giving with a few little things, like bottles of ale, that I would probably have done anyway. I'll leave DP a note saying his presents have been stolen by the christmas goblins, but they left their camara behind. Yes, I am still a child (but so is DP so it will be alright).

Oh, and we'll have a christmas morning fry up. And yorkshire puddings with christmas dinner (which DMil doesn't approve of). And I'll scoff chocolate all day, and later we'll walk the dog and watch Doctor Who, probably play a board game. I think it will be super.

Thank you - wasn't expecting so many responses. I was a bit worried it would just feel like any other Sunday but there are some great ideas here. Thank you.

We are having family this year, which I will enjoy, but my favourite years have been when its just the four of us, in our pjs, with takeaway. We play with all the new stuff, watch one of the n ew DVDs, and its the only day of the year pretty much now that absolutely everything is closed, so we dont feel stressed about what we should be doing - and that alone makes it really really special.

I usually take flowers to my granny's grave too.

And we do make phone calls to those we are lucky enough to still have around.

I would enjoy the chance to get drunk tipsy! I love our Christmas day but its a slog going to both parents houses, and if I'm honest by tea time I really wish I could be sitting getting merry watching TV! I miss drinking wine with the dinner too. (I'm the only driver)

My father died a few days after new year so our first Christmas without him was a double whammy, it was slightly subdued but still a generally merry day. We go to the cemetry on Christmas eve and I still buy him a card every year and a bottle of Jack Daniels which goes on his grave (God we sound like a family of alcoholics - We're not I promise ). It helps me that we made the decision to make Christmas eve the time we think about my Dad, because I was putting pressure on myself that I should go on the day but its just not practical for us.

I love Christmas with just the four of us! We spend the day eating lovely foods together, unwrapping presents, playing with/building new toys with the kids,going for a walk perhaps, watching a dvd together...the nice thing is we can do whatever suits us. There is also no pressure to cook a huge meal for lots of guests or to travel to relatives - you can just spend quality time with your family!

I am green with envy. My two will be with ex-H.

It can't possibly feel like any other Sunday; as you'll have the tree up, presents underneath, Santa may have come, you've got a special meal, Queen's speech, you can listen to carols - so many ways to make it different & lovely.
Enjoy every second of your time together on Christmas Day - you don't realise how special it is, until you don't have it.

Bugsy - thanks for your post. You've put it in perspective for me.