PLEASE TELL ME HONESTLY...

[NanaNina]

Now that the Christmas ads have started appearing on TV I am finding myself wondering the same thing as I do every year. Are there real families who sit in a perfectly cosy, tidy large room with a lovely Christmas tree in the corner, with a couple smiling happily at each other (maybe Christmas eve) and the snow falling softly outside......And the one on Christmas morning with 2 sweet kids in fluffy dressing gowns who are enraptured by their presents and a smiling mum and dad. Later the turkey is carried to the table by a woman with beautiful hair, lovely make up and dress, (no sign of being hot and harrassed by cooking the Christmas dinner) to the grateful cries of the rest of the family. DO they exist?? If you are one of them Please Tell Me. Thanks

Last christmas started out like a TV ad. The smell of turkey wafting from the kitchen the children sorting their toys in to tidy piles.

A little while later realised nothing else had gone in the oven (to busy playing, drinking and tidying). So turkey and chips loved by the kids.
Then when I asked the 2 DD's why they had put their toys into 3 piles was told "Thats my toys, that's her toys and that big pile is the toys we don't want".

Note to self buy oven chips and don't spend as much on the ungratefull DD's.

We always have two old university friends of my mums over and my sister and brother in law and her children and my mum and dad. We have the tree and a few decorations and a clean house. The children cut out paper snowflakes from ordinary white copier paper at the beginning of the hols and they go on the windows so it always looks christmassy. We have the special china out and a lovely 6 course vegetarian meal with crackers and the silly jokes and silly hats preceded by nibbles and iced pomegranate juice and followed by everyone (children and all the grown ups) relaxing on the sofa/floor, taking turns playing an instrument or reading a poem (the children write out a little programme just after lunch) then we have tea and cake and open presents and play charades and then all the guests go home and the children and I watch Dr Who if its early enough.
My sister never helps and always moans about every aspect of it. But she comes all the same and we (DC and I) end up with a nice warm fuzzy feeling at the end of the day. I'm the one who is in tears at some point, usually half an hour before everyone arrives.
The presents aren't major, usually books, (everyone loves books in the houses) and always a private eye annual, and in the morning the stockings always include a tangerine and a chocolate orange.
We don't dress up formally in party wear but wear comfortable day clothes.
When the children were very young the presents were toys and lots of them and the opening of presents happened very early and everyone went for a walk after lunch and before tea.

I just want to add that when the children were young I used to try and get them to open the presents in such a way as to save the wrapping paper. This, looking back, was completely pants. We never re used it and the years flew by so fast I now really regret not letting them just rip the paper off.

'I am exactly like that. But Drunk'

YYY, exactly waht Angryfeet says.

Right I've read the thread now and I'm leaping to LeQueen's defence. Why on earth does it sound snobby to have your children hang up (velvet) stockings by (period) fireplaces? Is that not what a perfect picture of Christmas is supposed to be about? And was that not the question the OP asked?

And I know wht she means by 'extrovert' - she means a family who all make an effort to talk/laugh/interact to make Christmas a special inter-generational family time, rather than just slumping in front of the telly like any other Sunday...

To the best of my knowledge none of our immediate family on either side has ever fallen out or flounced or burst into tears over a family Christmas. I'm sure we do rub one another up the wrong way from time to time, but frankly if someone annoys me sufficiently that they are likely to make me want to scream or cry I just wouldn't opt to spend Christmas with them at all. I don't understand all this traditional Christmas argument stuff. We are all civilised round our house!

Its just me and the kids Xmas eve. Each year we make a simple meal from a different country, DD gets to chose and helps cooking. We eat then get our new PJs on and then flomp in front of TV with tin of quality street and nibbles and drinks. On Xmas day ex DH comes over and I do the full turkey dinner but actually I treat it just as a normal sunday roast albeit with a few extras made up in the fridge a couple of days before. I love the smell of the kitchen on Xmas morning. I always have a moment of sadness when I look around the table and see the empty places where my beloved sister mum and dad should be but then I think of the kids, glug some wine and carry on.

nope

Am sp but xmas is slob out time , dd and ds3 have pizza , ds1 and ds2 have a curry made night befor eand nuked .

We eat when ever its wanted often not all together and last year we was in pjs all day bliss this year will be the same

snow......slipped and tripped on the ice underneath and ate dinner with a wet arse , sore wrist and laddered tights. Took the edge of the pretty snow scene outside

christmas tree....adorable but less than artistic paper baubles drawn by a todddler only a mummy and daddy can love (the baubles, not the toddler!). these have to be removed, recoloured, generally shown off and the tree redesigned every day or two for the whole period. additional glitter which gets all over the house, sparkly though.

presents......all beautifully set out just like the TVdream, when toddler comes downstairs, decides that cardbox box is the bestest ever present and is therefore not really interested in anything else.

however.......toddler finally gets excited about all the wrapping paper, the choccilicious theme and forgets to have a nap, collapses and falls asleep at 4.30pm right before dinner.

Still, christmas dinner itself was very peaceful.

Homemade Baileys recipe

Gently heat one litre of UHT full fat milk to blood temperature. Stir in one can of condensed milk, then add about half a cup of strong black coffee. Have a taste, add more coffee if needed. Then stir in about half a small bottle of whisky - add less than you think, you can always add more. Keep tasting until it's about right. Add a splodge more whisky when serving if you like. Make more than you think you need because it does prove popular.

Last year my grandad fell over in the snow on Christmas eve and ended up in hospital having a hip replacement. The heating and hot water broke at my mums and we all had to spend the entire time in one room with an electric fire on, and my mum and brother both had proper flu, i.e the knock you on your arse for at least a week type, and consequently there was no food in the house to eat.

I'm hoping this year will be better, although on xmas day I will be 38+3 pregnant. What could possibly go wrong?

I think if LQ had started a thread talking about velvet stockings hung on period fireplaces then you could praps justify a small snigger . But the OP asked does anyone have the picture perfect family Christmas and LQ answered. So not showy-offy IMO.

Bless you, zebrafinch. You sound lovely. I hope you and your dc have a brilliant Christmas this year. It sounds like a real family to me.

worldgonecrazy that sounds great. How long does it keep for? If I made some, say, mid-december and bottled it, would it be OK for between Xmas & NY?

On years when it's just DH, the kids and me, then I think our Christmas is pretty much perfect. Christmas eve we tend to sing some carols round the piano, have some treats, the boys go to bed (traditionally my mum sends them each new pyjamas, slippers and dressing gowns for Christmas eve so they wear them), then DH and I sit quietly with a hot chocolate or whatever til we know the boys are asleep - then we rush round doing stockings, watch a Christmassy film and go to bed.

Christmas morning, the stockings are opened in a mad flurry of activity (we hang them by the fireplace to prevent little people waking at 3am and opening them in bed when the rest of us are asleep!) We have breakfast and present opening is spread throughout the day - not in an artificial way, just because the kids like to play with each present as it comes.

I don't get too stressed about Christmas dinner because I prepare as much as possible on Christmas eve afternoon so literally all I do is cook the things I've prepared. I don't like Christmas to be ruined by me feeling flustered. However, no amount of make-up, fancy dresses or £££ spent on my hair will make me look beautiful so I just wear whatever is comfy. We're all usually pretty damn happy. No idea how this year will go down, we have FIL with us and as much as I love him, he winds me (and the kids) right up, so I am just hoping he'll spend a lot of time sleeping on the sofa.

agentprovocateur I don't know how long it keeps. It only takes a few minutes to make and we just keep it in an empty pop bottle in the fridge. Once people know it's there it has always been drunk within a day or two. I once made several litres for a Christmas party thinking there would be some left over for me but it got guzzled.

Oohh, I don't like to see people laughing or sneering at other people's Christmases ....

I wouldn't mind spending Christmas in a tastefully decorated Georgian Rectory ...
Mmmm, with a roaring fire .... ( Sometimes we go somewhere like that for a retreat day with the local church, and it is beautiful and very Christmasey. )

But of course at the end of the day it's the people you're with that really matters ... and whether the children are happy.

We did decorate the tree while the snow fell a week before Christmas last year, enjoying port and mincepies as we did so! Only spoilt by my DH saying 'This is so surreal, it's like being in one of those awful adverts!'

Funny - I do seem to remember Christmas being like the 'TV' ad when I was a kid. I guess my Mum was a great actress and good at covering up the stress. Maybe if she been less organisde and my Dad had not been so easy going then I wouldn't feel like such a failure when I am reduced to tears in the kitchen ( that last post rang very true) and the kids have had too much chocolate and beineg vile and DH is in a monosylabic foul grump cos my Mum and single brother are with us AGAIN.

we've had a christmas with an ear infection, christmas where MIL had a nervous breakdown, christmas with D&V, and a christmas lunch out meal which was rather disappointing. This year it si just us (me, kids and DH), and I know it will be the best ever! [hopeful emoticon]

Last year's Christmas was perfect. Children woke at sensible hour, we had stocking presents, went to Mass, home for cup of tea/gin and tonic and opened our presents. Extension and new kitchen finished, so we had whole family round for lunch (Mum, MIL,FIL , SIL, BIL, nephew and the 5 of us). Beautiful organic free range turkey crown, superbly cooked with all the trimmings. Opened family presents.

Then felt v tired and a bit odd, went to bed and didn't come out of bedroom for 4 days as hit by flu. Could hardly stand, couldn't eat, violent headache and have no idea where 4 days of my life went.

Lesson is that karma will always get you back if you try to be so blardy perfect, so this year we will muddle through in a drunken haze of overeating and children squabbling as usual

LeQueen you are my hero... On a technical note, how do you attach the stockings to the fireplace? I am reluctant to hammer nails into a rather old and very lovely mantelpiece...

Not trying to hijack this thread but can you tell me what you think is essential for a good Christmas? What's the nicest bit you'd not want to go without? I like the idea of stockings and a log fire... (This is from someone who's lived in the UK for nearly 20 years but I still don't 'get it'...)