PLEASE TELL ME HONESTLY...

[NanaNina]

Now that the Christmas ads have started appearing on TV I am finding myself wondering the same thing as I do every year. Are there real families who sit in a perfectly cosy, tidy large room with a lovely Christmas tree in the corner, with a couple smiling happily at each other (maybe Christmas eve) and the snow falling softly outside......And the one on Christmas morning with 2 sweet kids in fluffy dressing gowns who are enraptured by their presents and a smiling mum and dad. Later the turkey is carried to the table by a woman with beautiful hair, lovely make up and dress, (no sign of being hot and harrassed by cooking the Christmas dinner) to the grateful cries of the rest of the family. DO they exist?? If you are one of them Please Tell Me. Thanks

Yes - it's exactly like that.

Although I can't always organise the snow.

daftpath :o

nananina I sniff the washing, especially in the summer when it comes off the line nice and crisp.

nananina, you are hilarious! and youre not alone on this.

we all secretly want that advert christmas BUT IT DOESNT EXIST! surely?

ok there might be moments in the day when you get that joyous feeling of everything going well and thats great but in reality theres going to equally be moments of madness, messiness, chaos and disorganisation.

in our house i prep as much as i can and decorate house as nice as i can (on a budget) and then just take the day as it comes, knowing ive done my best.
the presents are ripped open by kids within 5 mins of us entering our SMALL livingroom, me and hubby are shattered from the night before and our 3 kids, not 2, usually have sticky up hair and crumpled jammies.
yes i do wear a dress and heels and do my hair etc BUT the heels are off after an hour, slippers are on and hair needs to scraped back when carving and dishing out. me and hubby usually quietly bicker while doing this bit so the guests dont hear and when we finally sit down to eat in our kitchen i am bright red, not hungry and just want to drink my cava.

having said all that, to me, that is a perfect christmas. family together, happy kids, some good food and a glass or four of something nice. perfection!
(even if it is a bit cramped and messy with toys)
take it easy and enjoy it.

lemondifficult - why will yours be so different this year? just being nosey.

we used to have christmas like that with my parents (but after german traditoon in the evening of course).
there would be presents under the tree in a spotless living room, everyone would be dressed im their nice sunday clothes, eat dinner together, then gather around the tree, sing songs while the real tree had real candles burning on it, and then we would open our presents in a civilised manner, no ripping paper etc.

all this only happened.like that because of the threat that christmas would be cancelled otherwise

This year I have a spreadsheet.

I have already bought or chosen 53 presents (53, I know, mental) not including stocking fillers. They'll all be wrapped before the end of November.

I'm going to choose a theme for my tree, never had one before. I'm going to do lots of prepping in advance and let other people do lots of the food.

Inspired by this thread, I am going to lay out my Outfit the night before.

See, see, get me!

It'll all go to bollocks of course

I think it is highly unrealistic to try and have a "perfect day"!

I would suggest allowing the kids to enjoy their presents in the morning, have a "perfect lunch", then let them watch telly in the afternoon while the adults enjoy some booze :D

I have the 'Fantasy Christmas' - the shopping being a pleasant, heartwarming festive experience (to be completed in one day) .
My DCs going to bed at a decent time .
Me getting enough sleep.
Me wafting about on Christmas Day with perfect hair,make-up and nails -which survive the cooking traumas.
Not sitting watching the soaps (their Christmas's are always tragic, makes mine feel better)

In Eastenders everyone buys everything from the market-(or the Mini-Mart) -clothes,shoes,decorations,veg,even the turkey. No-one trudges round supermarkets or has TescoDirect
And it always manages to snow just at the right time!

i have never felt so sleep deprived (not since dd was a baby) as i do on xmas morning.

I hardly sleep, i keep waking up. dd sleeps right thru.!!!

NanaNina the penny has dropped where I know your name from! The fostering thread, you were involved in childrens social work/social care for many years.

Your description of a perfect fantasy Christmas- is that something that the children you worked with would dream of having?

My Christmas with my 2 ratbags lovely DCs isn't Hallmark Card perfect. But I do think about the children who know that their schoolfriends will be enjoying the festivities, but they have to endure neglect, violence, arguements and hunger.

Sobering thought.

My children have always been well behaved on Christmas Day - but that's because I am a raging Nazi when it comes to behaviour generally! Our Christmas days are always rather nice but that's because we stay at home and don't invite anybody for Christmas day and just have a nice, peaceful day with just the four of us. We generally do get on well, spend time together, smile nicely and take time over opening our presents.

But my hair is never beautiful and I can't promise that I didn't swear the year I set fire to the oven. :) And we are all veggie bar dp, so I don't cook turkey!

We open lots of pressies.
I clean up heaps of packaging.
We burn some of the paper to keep warm (I like to burn things ).
We talk to rellies on phone.
DC eat too much chocolate & watch too much TV.
DC do all their usual fierce sibling rivalry fighting bashing heads in.
We don't eat anything special, or keep any unusual traditions. I like the pretty tree, though.
We see relatives on Boxing day or later.
I am pants at the whole "special" "magical" thing, aren't I?!

DC get wildly excited about Xmas, anyway, they don't think they are missing out on anything at least.

Our christmas is a bit hectic. This year it will be an early start, wrapping paper everywhere and then we are off to my dads (leaving all the mess behind) where we will have a more classic christmas (sit around the tree opening presents, eat turkey etc..).

Our christmas is a bit like the soda streem advert minus the christmas jumpers.

"it's not a proper Christmas until one of the women is in floods of tears in the kitchen".

Yup, same here!

Madness starts around 6am. by 6.30am it looks like a bomb has hit our place with all the paper everywhere. by 8 we are cooking breakfast on the beach by 10am we are drinking white wine. no need to cook turkey as its to hot so we have salad when we want and maybe a bbq in the evening. very relaxed day with the 4 of us

We stayed at home last year me, dp and dd. Was lovely..me and DP spent the morning with our feet up drinking tea while dd played with her playdoh, then we had a lovely beef dinner which dp cooked while i played with dds toys tidied up a bit. Followed by a lovely evening watching The Polar Express and an old Only Fools and Horses. Bliss...

We are going to MILs this year. DP wants to stay there. Overnight. I will be taking a large bottle of Southern Comfort with me.

Chirstmas here is a case of...kids jump on me, or to be more precise, my bladder to wake me up. I'm then blinded by the light which is switched on just as my eyelids fly open from the force of my bladder trying to escape though my retenas, I stagger out of bed, bump into the walls, make it to the bathroom, pee while hearing screams and excited shouts, kids run downstairs, I stumble down them barely keeping upright, locate screwdrivers, kettle, batteries and plastic bag..make coffee, look at the clock, swear under my breath, log onto skype, set it so HE can watch the kids trash the house upwrap presents, down coffee, make another one, step onto newly tipped out lego, swear a little louder, then make another coffee, log off skype, make sure kids eat something that vaguely resembles breakfast before they devour all the sweets, hide sweets, get dinner on, collapse on sofa and watch them argue/play/make a mess.

It's bloody great, I love it. I'm laughing now typing it all.

Hi Lordoftheflies - yes tis me! To be honest when I started this thread I was just so pissed off with the christmas ads starting so early and everything being so perfect. However I always think that a third of the world are starving and we are faffing about roast potatoes! I also know of course through my work that so many children will not get presents or any sort of special day, and it's hard to imagine really. When I was new to social work I took some kids from an estate I worked on to a pantomine (not a big production) and they remembered it for years after, and whenever they saw me they would mention the pantomime. I think that tells us that it was such a huge event in their impoverished lives.

However, am not wanting to turn the thread into something more serious cus I'm really enjoying the posts and it's something I've often wondered about, even though I know real life is nothing like that ads. Oh and yes voldermarts have to confess to a quick sniff at the washing in the summer when it is all fresh! but you know the ads I mean where the woman goes into raptures over her son's beautiful clean shirt because she's used whatever it is that's being advertised.

What do people think about christmas cards - I have sent them every year but am seriously thinking of stopping (except to the people I woud write a message to in the card who I haven't seen for a while) we just get them and look at them and put them on the side (I like nice cards, do keep a few I really like and add them to the store I have collected over the years (IF I can find them) but then just re-cycle the rest after christmas. I love the ones with a message and maybe a photo of a new child etc but the ones To x and x Merry Christmas x and x leave me a bit cold. Oh god you are all going to think I am a real miserable sod and I'm not really......bah humbug!!

no, I dont like cards either, I think they are a waste of money and paper.

They clutter up the house for a few weeks then all get chucked in the bin and it's such a waste.

I stopped doing them when I moved out but now the kids are at school a lot if not all of them come from them.

I always say this christmas it will be like x...

and it never is. but im never going to be perfect and since im in control of christmas its obvious to me that christmas wont be perfect either

Yes our Christmas is like that. But with more wine.

I always have a relaxed xmas day but I dont cook, wash up or do any cleaning. Christmas is but once a year and Im not running around doing stuff I want to enjoy myself