Got any Qs about getting set for Christmas? Come and ask journalist and author India Knight- ANSWERS BACK

[RachelMumsnet]

We're inviting you to send in questions to India Knight, who's joining us for a Christmas-themed Q&A. India is the authority on all things celebration, whether it's how to decorate your home for Christmas on a budget, where and how to shop on a budget and how to navigate the social minefields over the holiday season.

Her latest novel, Comfort and Joy, tells the story of Clara Dunphy who finds herself on Oxford Street with two shopping days left to Christmas, desperately, madly trying to make everything, not perfect, but just right for her extended family on the greatest day of the year. But then she gets distracted . . .Comfort and Joy is described by Jilly Cooper as a 'hilarious, bawdy yet touching portrait of Christmas over three years'. India has also written Thrift book: Live well and spend less and The Shops, both of which touch on the subject of Christmas shopping and saving.

India is a weekly columnist for the Sunday Times and visited Mumsnet previously for a live webchat. Send us your questions for India by Wednesday 16th November, and we will choose the ten best to send over to her. The authors of the selected questions will all receive a set of her beautifully repackaged novels, courtesy of Penguin.

I have a newborn baby and am dreading the whole Christmas thing! I want to make it special for my 4yo though. Any tips on how to cope with a newborn, shopping, cooking, and entertaining guests whilst trying to get to grips with a newborn and breastfeeding?

Any tips on magical things I could do for my 4 yo?

It's the first year my MiL will be coming over for Christmas (we're in France) and I'll be nearly six months pregnant. She's happy to share the cooking. My question is how do I get a partially-renovated house Christmas/MiL ready without expelling too much precious energy or spending too much cash?

How do you get the balance between traditionally home-made Christmas and knackered, frazzled woman on the edge?

Any ideas for something we can do to keep us all entertained Christmas day afternoon. Ages ranging from 2 to 89 years old. Cannot stand another afternoon listening to simultanous snoring and overtired crying children. Thanks

A frugal christmas will be had here. DH is in Belgium, I am in the NW with DD. He will be coming over around December 20th.
How can we have a good time without spending £££££s (d'ya like the Chat stylee that I used there?)
DD is aware that she won't be getting as much as in years gone by and that's fine.

I'm 48, I did my first Christmas dinner in 1983, in 2011 after doing 27 more (I've had one year off for good behaviour!) it's not that I'm heartily sick and fed up of it, it's just that there's nothing to be excited about anymore.

My children are 23, 18 and 15 and my 84 year old mum will be with us. I have tried to suggest changes to the daily routine, but they are having none of it, we get up, open presents, go and collect mum, go to church, go to a friends for gin a present exchange, come home, have sandwiches, laze about, get the meal ready and eat about 6. Dh's parents pop round sometime in the day.

I want the day to be wonderful, I reaslise that each Christmas may be my mum's last and that soon the children will have their own homes and I am aware that each year could be our last all sat together round my dining table.

How can you inject magic into something that has happened so often?

oh and it goes without saying that money is a serious issue!!

I have lots of questions but I need to collect my thoughts . Marking place, will be back.

I enjoyed reading Comfort & Joy, and I wondered how much it reflected your own family life?

I love Christmas, and the whole build up to it. What I don't enjoy is all the travelling and having to visit the family all over the country. Not that I don't love seeing them, just can't bear always being on the road, often in bad weather, when I'd like to be in my own house, on my own sofa, watching my own telly and in my own bed!

We love Christmas but because money is tighter we need to do it on a budget - what would be your advice about what to miss out/what to include and any suggestions for thriftiness with food/decorations and pressies!

PS Wife has just read your article in Red Magazine this month and loves the very positive vibes your home seems to give off!

Hello India, loved the Thrift book - especially the bit about emotional thrift which I wanted to highlight and leave lying around for various extended family members - and the ideas for Christmas in there. Esp getting everyone involved.

I would like to know how and if it's possible to stop the Christmas flip-flopping where you go to one set of parents one year and the others the next. I want to spend Christmas in my own home from now on.

I'm happy for whoever wants to share Christmas to come to us - as long as they don't expect to be waited on hand and foot - but we can't seem to get out of the pattern.

Our parents never went to anyone else for Christmas dinner when DH and I were growing up, relatives would have to visit us. I'm just fed up of dragging two children around the place and staying over when I just want to be at bloody home. All advice gratefully received

Righto.

India, I have noticed in your novels that your characters always seem to remain on good terms with The Ex(es). I am looking forward to a Christmas flitting between divorced-and-remarried parents (3 sets) and enjoying the company of my own Ex (DD's father) on Christmas Day itself.

Relations very definitely have the potential to become strained. Do you have any tips on keeping the atmosphere light and fun that I can pass on and use myself? My current plan (getting stuck into the Baileys over breakfast) has some flaws.

Thanks very much, Merry nearly Christmas

My son is 11, so still very young and I try to get all excited, but really Christmas has turned into a chore. I used to love the whole thing, but particularly after my mother died a few years ago, Christmas has lost its sparkle.

So to echo lilibet, how can I get the magic back?

This sounds like someone asking how to put the spark back into their marriage, doesn't it. I guess it's not so disimilar

Lots of questions already! Here's mine...

I grew up in a very "nuclear" family, with very few relations nearby so Christmas was always the 5 of us, at home, doing more or less the same things every year but enjoying it!

I also used to love the relative "laziness" of our family Christmas - lots of relaxing, exploring new presents, reading or doing jigsaws, and enjoying being together in a relaxed way - no forced "socialising" or organised activities.

But now we live away from my family, and DH's family is much bigger (all married with children). So every year is different - sometimes at my parents', sometimes at SIL's or BIL's, or sometimes at ours with various guests. So my questions are:

• First, how can we create some stability and nice traditions/expectations for the DCs, when we are in a different place and fitting in with different people's arrangements every Christmas?

• And second, how can I reconcile my secret wish for a nice lazy relaxed Christmas and being able to do what I want a bit (reading etc), with the usual reality of loads of visitors/visiting, a houseful of children, lots of plans made for us (family walks, organised helping, etc) and feeling like I have to be obviously "sociable" all day?

(PS I know this makes me sound like an antisocial grump I don't think I am really, I love seeing everyone but DO need a bit of time to myself sometimes!).

well, my question/s are that my DCs know that there is no FC this year so how can i still make it special for them? it already feels different because of what they now know
do you have any ideas for me please? DS is 9yo and DD is 7yo.

i always have my lovely in-laws for lunch on Christmas Day and we have a super time together.

thank you

We've just moved into a new house, our 1st proper 'grown up' house. We'll be 15 for lunch, only done Christmas lunch for half that many before, but I'm sure it'll be fun. I'm seriously excited about decking the halls.... Visions of lovely crafty making things, but I see myself heading for a fall when Dds x 3 start getting on my nerves or not creating according to plan. Please talk me out of it or give me some easy ideas? Thanks.

My dcs are also older. 15, 12 and 9. My question is this.

I love the build up to Christmas and the whole holiday. Dh is self employed and this will be the first whole week he had had off since last Christmas, so I feel even more pressure to make it perfect. What kind of activities can I do with my family leading up to and over this period. Now Dcs are to old for grotto visits, reading Christmas stories, pantos and leaving snacks out for fc, all my traditions have been made redundant.

So again how do we inject the magic back into Christmas, but not just the day but the whole holiday. How do we keep the excitement alive on a budget with hard to please teenagers.

Can I serve mashed potato as a 'side' on Christmas Day? (there will be roasties too)

• I have the same people over Christmas Eve and Day, it's a lot of potato making!

Oh, I love India. Writes so brilliantly. I still laugh when I see sssssssensual massage oils in crappy shops.

I love Christmas and all it entails. We are at HOME this christmas, every year since me and DP have been together we have traipsed out somewhere (even if just for drinks at the PILs) on Christmas day. This year we are not and I can't wait.

Two questions: I know Christmas is not all about presents, however I have a 16 year old dd and an adult stepson, my dd will be getting her present before Christmas and I bought stepson a laptop and gave it to him as an early christmas present when his old one blew up. Also, me and DP don't buy each other many gifts (we have a £5 gift limit, and then have a massive blow out dinner somewhere in january as a present to each other). Anyway, there won't be many gifts under the tree. DD and Dstepson have stockings, but do you have any tips to make the present situation look less bleak, and also to stop me dashing round the shops at 3pm on Christmas eve like a manic lottery winner, out of sheer guilt and christmas panic?

Secondly, we have 2 8 month old kittens. They are going to run up the tree aren't they? What can I do to stop it (other than kick the kittens out into the snow).

Oh, and a third question.

Please do you have any el cheapo christmas cocktail recipes?

Laurie - we always had mash as a side. But it was poshed up by being piped onto a baking tray and cooked for a bit. Crisp outside with fluffy mash inside

laurie - I always do a great load of mashed swede as well. I make this on the Christmas eve and it only needs reheating on the day.

If you give a large selection of veg (again a lot of it can be pre prepared) you don't have to give everyone gargantuan quantities of roast potatoes except me

mrskwaz my DP does that with mash - I curled my lip at him when he first did it, but it is lovely.

If you have loads of people the problem is with having enough room in your oven for all the trays - there is always a point at Christmas when I reach screaming point with the potatoes, pigs in blankets, stuffing, parsnips etc and feel like telling the turkey and family to go fuck themselves.

Roast dinners are a bugger to get everything ready for the same time. As much done as possible beforehand helps, but there is that panic as you tried to get everything served up and hot at the same time. I use booze to help smooth the edges

Dearest India,
Do you have any suggestions for an alternative turkey stuffing, ideally wheat-free, for a (wannabe) twig.