Where to go for Christmas?

[yellowraincoat]

So I learnt yesterday that my parents plan on spending Christmas with my brother and his wife. I am invited (I guess), but they only have one spare bedroom, meaning I'd have to sleep on the sofa (no thanks).

My partner is going up to his Mum's, and I know she'd welcome me, but I think he'd enjoy some time with his family without me there.

A friend of mine is thinking about staying in the UK (she's American), and we had planned to go to my parents' together as her husband is going back to the US, but now there's pretty much not enough room for her at my brother's.

I don't really get on with my family and tend to dread Christmas. If my friend is staying here, I am more than happy to spend Christmas with her, I think it would be a laugh.

Or does anyone have suggestions for places I could go? I don't particularly mind spending it alone, but also don't want people doing "poor you" faces at me when I say I don't have anywhere to go. I volunteered one time in a homeless shelter and it was ok, but I found it a little bit stressful to be honest.

I'm a bit pissed off with my parents for arranging to go to my brother's without telling or asking me! I won't have my own room so nowhere to escape to.

If you and your friend can't do Christmas together at your place, I would just lie to the Poor You Face people and if you want to be alone, do that. If you don't enjoy it with your family I see no point in going. Are you just guessing about your partner's feelings about time alone with his family? Might be worth the conversation.

Hmm so you have the fridge and remote controt to yourself...sounds like heaven!

I think my friend is going to have a Christmas party at her house for everyone stuck in London for whatever reason.

Alone does sound appealing though - sitting in pyjamas, watching crap on telly, mmm.

So angry that my parents haven't included me in the decision though.

Um.

You were dreading spending Christmas with your family and now you don't have to. What's not to like?

Is there "history" with your parents and brother? Sounds like there is more to this.

On the face of it, your parents have two grown-up children, both with partners and their own homes, and they've chosen which set to spend Christmas with. Then they've let the other set know. That's normal, isn't it?

When you say "we had planned to go to my parents' together" do you mean your parent's had invited you both to go, and now have uninvited you? Or do you mean you had assumed you could both go, and were intending to invite yourselves? Because if so I could see that your parents might be a bit annoyed at you.

Has your partner said he doesn't want you with him at Christmas? That would be a bit wierd too ...

Yes, of course there's more to this, isn't there always?

Yes, I assumed I would go to my parents - they are my parents, it's Christmas, that's what we've always done, I at least expected to be asked what I wanted.

No my partner hasn't said he doesn't want me with him at Christmas, but I think he'd rather spend some time with his mum since he doesn't get to see her much.

I'm glad you think my situation is weird though, that's helpful.