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Original poster

Anyone else have issues with GP's and presents?

57 replies

Pigleychez · 28/10/2011 11:21

My mum has asked for a list for the girls. I emailed her some links this morning and now is saying i'll have to see what Santa brings.

Why she cant give me an idea of what shes getting i dont know! Its not like im going to tell the kids. I just want an idea so I don't duplicate on anything plus the Inlaws have been asking so what she doesnt want to get I can suggest to them. But now I dont know what to suggest to them as I dont know what shes going to be getting.
Grr. Angry

Next year I will just give her one toy and say buy them that!

Anyones elses family awkward about presents?

OP posts:
Catsdontcare · 28/10/2011 22:11

Mil "what would dc's like for Xmas"
Me "well they love Lego so maybe something along those lines"
Mil "wilko's have a ten foot crane"
Me "not sure we can accommodate a ten foot crane, they love Lego or maybe xyz"
Mil "I'm just wondering about this crane"
Me "oh fuck off and buy fucking crane you're going to anyway so why fucking hassle me for ideas when you've clearly got your mind set on something"

Catsdontcare · 28/10/2011 22:14

I don't really say the last bit out loud I usually just chew on the end of the receiver

Thzumbazombiewitch · 28/10/2011 22:31

neverever - yep, that sounds like the sort of thing MIL would do too! Grrrrr.

Tolalola · 29/10/2011 01:40

Oooh I feel evil for ranting but...My mother's ds's only gp and she's so annoying about bloody presents! She would never even consider asking us what he might like or discussing what she might get, which is quite annoying as she has no idea what he plays with.

But the worst thing is she's just so mean about presents. Instead of a present, she'll give a note saying what she's going to buy for him, and it'll never materialise, or she'll buy things, even wrap them, and then if he gets more than about 2 other presents she won't give hers to him at all, saying he's had too many already.

She has a cupboard where she keeps lots of things she's stashed, some of which have been wrapped for more than a year now, which he's probably too old for, that she just never gave him.

HauntyMython · 29/10/2011 01:44

Why ask you and then not tell you... Agree it seems needlessly childish.

Mum asks what she should get - mainly because she wouldn't have a clue what to get or where to get it and wouldn't want the hassle anyway - we buy it and get the money back. Suits us all!

Thzumbazombiewitch · 29/10/2011 02:36

Tolalola - your mum appears to have a screw loose - what on earth is the point of that?? Does she plan on donating the ungiven presents to a children's ward or a CHristmas for the Poor charity or something? Otherwise, what an unbelievable waste of money! Shock

AVoidkaTheKillerZombies · 29/10/2011 09:23

Catsdontcare We have had that conversation every year for 10 years :0

Although ours usually goes like this

MIL - what would DS like for Christmas?
Me - oh xxx or yyy
MIL - Well I was thinking about a lentil weaving kit which I can get from Oxfam and is fairtrade. It will teach DS about the value of Christmas.
Me - If thats what you want
MIL - I think Christmas is a very materialistic time. I think I will go with my idea.

Now I am not ungrateful, she can buy him what she wants. But why does she ask me every bloody year. Her presents always have a 'message' to them, like recycling, or fairtrade, or something she got at a socialist fair. Like the year she got 4yo DS a Stop the War mug.

seeker · 29/10/2011 09:28

"EVERYONE else is more than happy for me to ask them how much they want to spend and then allocate presents accordingly"

Bloody hell, what a depressing and joyless way to carry on!

Thzumbazombiewitch · 29/10/2011 09:32

Not when you're in Australia and your family and child's godparents are in England, Seeker. Get a grip love! Grin

scarevola · 29/10/2011 09:38

ffff is right and they need some thinking time.

Mine do a nice variant on this - they agree to buy X, I think great and scribble it off my mental list. On the day, no X, something completely different. "Oh, I knew you'd mentioned something but I couldn't remember".

Actually this only mattered one year when one DC had heart particularly set on X. I leaned pdq not to rely on anyone else for the things that mattered. And to be fair, the GPs often come up with some wonderful surprises.

AVoidkaTheKillerZombies · 29/10/2011 10:05

I dont think its a depressing attitude. Whenever I am asked what the DC's want I think about who is asking. If its my sister who is a student I know what her budget is so I will suggest a book. If its my Dad who likes to spend a fair bit, I will suggest something else.

I have my own list and suggest things to people off it. I dont dish out the whole list because it wont work over 4 families who dont speak to each other.

4madboys · 29/10/2011 10:23

my parents and mil just ask and we give them seperate ideas, tbf they are very good, this year my parents are buying the boys a joint present of an xbox kinnect and then will just get some other little bits for the younger two :)

i am tonight going to email my mil a list of links of ideas, she is miffed as my parents are getting them something 'big' so she wants to get something equally good Hmm ds3 wants one of the larger mini micro scooters so that is one thing sorted, not sure about the others yet, some googling to be done!

Tolalola · 29/10/2011 13:24

I know Thzumbazombiewitch, she's completely barking! She told me about a year and a half ago that she'd bought him Mr Men dvds. Which would have been great, but she just put them in the cupboard and never gave them to him, so we downloaded them from Youtube in the end.

She never donates any of it. It just stays there in 'the cupboard of pointlessness'. Maybe she's waiting in vain for my Dsis to have babies Confused.

sunnyday123 · 29/10/2011 16:36

my parents and mil ask each year around this time - i know they both spend £50 on each child so i make sure i have 2 items worth £50 for each child on a list :) Of course they can choose a present themselves if they want but usually they are happier with this as they want to get something the kids like. TBH the whole family does this - we all write lists about october and each tell one another how much we are spending and then pass on something from the list. This is great as it make sure the kids get most of whats on their lists and less unnecessary presents. We all try to get on the 3 for 2 at boots/argos too.

belledechocchipcookie · 29/10/2011 16:41

Yes. Ex Mil. Every year she buys ds something very educational. Last year it was a game about who gets the last word Hmm and another weather station. I wouldn't normally moan but she'd called and asked what he wanted. It took me ages to help him to think of something, he finally decided that he'd like her to adopt a penguin for him. She didn't. I ended up having to sort it out and the presents are still unused. Every year she askes him what he will like, every year she ignores him.

openerofjars · 29/10/2011 20:21

Tolalola, tell her about the MN Christmas appeal? What a waste, and what a shame for your DS.

belle, another weather station? Poor kid.

belledechocchipcookie · 29/10/2011 20:43

Yup. There's 2 lemon clocks floating around the house also. She gave him a lamp showing the stars a few years ago. He's been asking for a ds game for 6 years. Sad

neverever · 29/10/2011 20:45

Opener how are you (ellielou02) here, congratulations btw :)

neverever · 29/10/2011 20:46

Sorry for hijack.

WhereDidAllThePuffinsGo · 29/10/2011 21:03

OP - tell her that you and the inlaws are shopping from the same list, and that she is going to be giving her presents last - so hers will be the duplicate if there is one. The one that your dds look at and cast aside saying "yeah, granny bought me that already". Or, she could tell you what she's got ...

Perhaps this year I'll tell the gps that I'm not going to buy presents for them unless they tell me what to buy. They have to give me a nice long list of things to choose from, with internet links to the online shops so I don't have to put in any effort at all. And then I'll ignore it and buy them something from Poundland and not tell anyone so no one else can use the list ...

LikeABlackFlameCandleBNQ · 29/10/2011 21:33

Im sure all GPs must have this 'talent' lurking somewhere! I can't even mention to my Dmum ANYTHING im planning on buying in for the LO when it arrives in Dec: she will go and buy it and give it to me the next time I see it. Its lovely that she wants to contribute, and also lovely that she obviously listens to what I would like and gets that, BUT there will be nothing left for me to buy, and it gest to the point where I feel I either have to say 'I bought xyz' after the fact OR not tell her at all.

I only wanted to get three things for LO for xmas, as if it arrives on time, will only be 9 days old.: a stocking, a first xmas bauble and a copy of Night before Christmas. I bought the book, then had to tell DMum so she wouldn't, to be then told, "I've ordered you a bauble and your sis is out shopping for a stocking".

Grrr....three things I really want to spend time choosing and will see my kids through till they are adults, and I can only get one Sad

I feel guilty, as I dont want to be ungrateful, but there is nothing else a 9day old will need, and as it's mum, I would like to buy these things. ALso, I said to her that if the baby is born after christmas, could she keep the items for it's present for next year to which she was Hmm .... well, it's not going to have much use for them in January Grin

Waswondering · 29/10/2011 21:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

openerofjars · 29/10/2011 22:02

Hi neverever! How are you? Thanks!

hophophippidtyhop · 30/10/2011 06:53

I like your thinking, wheredidallthepuffinsgo.

leftmydignityatthedoor · 30/10/2011 10:22

My mum buys everything she can think of.

Mil says 'I hate shopping, here's x amount' - that pisses me off - its the thought that counts and all that!!

My brother has said he will get ds a dsi this year - its his main present - if he doesn't get it I don't know what I will do!

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